Sunday, March 31, 2013

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Food for Thought: Open-Mindedness

One of my favorite readers Lisa B. text me yesterday and asked for a Food-for-Thought post. So I thought I'd post something from one of the books I am currently reading. 

I am reading a fabulous book right now.

Walking into Walls: 5 Blind Spots that Block God's Work in You by Stephen Arterburn.

This book is a real in-your-face eye opener. I have been reading it for the past few weeks, just a few pages or a whole chapter here and there. I can't seem to finish because I am reading some chapters two or three times. It is just that good. This book is a real gem.

Sometimes Joyce Meyer has special guests on her show and they have a sit-down discussion about various topics, and one day last month, I believe, the author was a guest. I believe he is a Christian based therapist of some type. They were discussing some really serious topics like the root of addictions and what not. I found it all very interesting. They briefly mentioned the book, as it wasn't a show about the book. I remember having to make sure to catch the name of the book on a second episode, since it was so briefly mentioned.

Anyway, I found out something interesting while reading this book:

I have been working really hard on various areas of my life. For years. YEARS. And I will continue to do so. But this is the first book that really went into depth concerning many of the things I had been working on. Many of things I've done to solve some of my attitude problems were detailed in this book.

And here I thought I was doing something original concerning myself. Humph.

But it was good to read about many of my problem areas, some of which are no longer problem areas. And thank goodnees I had the fortitude back in my late 20s and early 30s to recognize that I needed to change in some areas of my life.

The book was a detailed discussion of the many "walls" that keep us from moving forward.

The Wall of Stubborn Resistance
The Wall of Arrogant Entitlement
The Wall of Justifiable Resentment
The Wall of Disconnected Isolation
The Wall of Blind Ignorance

I won't discuss them all.  That in itself would take forever, lol.

But there was one section, a portion within the chapter on the The Wall of Stubborn Resistance, that caught my attention.

It was a section on "Open-mindedness".

I think it resonated with me because it is one of the areas that I have been working on for awhile.

First of all, there were some interesting questions to evaluate if you or open-minded. I will list some here.
(Refernce: Chapter

How frequently do I admit that I am wrong?
How frequently do I ask for forgiveness?
How frequently do I ask people for their opinion?
Do I ever admit that I have been approaching problems in unhealthy ways?
Am I willing to admit that I might need help to move beyond the walls in my life?
Have I ever said, "You knew I was this way when you married me?"
Do people tell me, or do I feel that I have a strong need always to be right?
Do I stop listening to people who try to get me to see things in different ways?
Am I a "my way or the highway" kind of person?

Those are some hard-nosed questions.

There was a good chapter that defined the term "open-mindedness". It is defined as:

1. The ability to see things from another person's perspective
2. The willingness to acknowledge that there are other points of view other than your own.
3. The ability to realize that you may not always be right.
4. The ability to realize that you need to make things right when they are wrong.
5. The willingness to be quiet for awhile and listen to someone else.
6. The ability to consider counseling or recovery, because their is a wealth of information available that you may not otherwise find on your own.

I found all of this so interesting. For some reason, it stuck with me the most of everything out of the book.

I think it is because I run into close-minded people on a regular basis. It irks me to no end. And it always reminds me that I need to continually work on myself in that area.

I don't do well at all around close-minded people. Especially if they are over 40. Let's face it, when us over 40 folks have our habits and attitudes, they are bit deep rooted. That is why I ALWAYS tell folks in their late 20s or early 30s to go ahead and work on their attitudes, goals, etc. Just do it. Start then! Not later.

And then we start walking on the dark side. I am not only close-minded, but now I have a problem with you because your beliefs are different from mine. And I'm trying to convince you that I am right. I am always right. Sigh.

Let's face it. You're not the only person walking on this earth. Not everyone has your exact set of experiences. I realize it about myself, even. It doesn't even cross my mind to argue with people about religion, beliefs and the like. Why? Because your beliefs may or may not be similar to mine.

And I don't argue about it. I am open-minded enough to listen to your point of view. I am not only concerned in what your opinions are, but the "why" behind it. That gets to the core of who a person truly is deep inside.

And I don't see that way of thinking too much. We're too busy fighting and fussing. Not willing to consider other points of view. And that's the main reason for all this conflict.

Look at the hot topics in the news. Especially today. Our close-mindedness births conflict. So sad.

So I thought I would post up a little something I read from the book that has stayed on my mind. I keep going back and reading this section. I think it was worth posting so I can come back to it when I need to.

There you go, Lisa B! Hope you enjoyed that specially ordered food-for-thought :)

Monday, March 25, 2013

Monday Again.

Well it is Monday.
Once again.

Seems like this day of the week always comes around at this very same time...

It never fails.

LOL. Yes, that sounds silly. But it feels like this year is flying by. Before you know it, it will be spring time. Why next weekend, we will be hollering "Happy Easter". We'll be scrounging through bushes looking for easter eggs.

Haven't done that in awhile. It is fun to remember, though.

Anyway, it is cold as I don't know what in the ATL. I'm not sure why it's 37 degrees outside right now, but man... when I think of the month of March, I think sunshine and 70 degrees at least. Yes we have had some warm days here, but not quite enough.

This morning started off with a doctor's appointment. Sigh. I wasn't all that happy about that. Not to mention that I woke up this morning in a FOUL mood. Not sure what's up with that. I think I was a little miffed because I had to leave home earlier than usual and drive some 30 miles to the doctor's office. You know how much I don't like to drive. And besides, I'm not riding in luxury right now. I'm traveling around in Pam!

Pam is on program until Lucy's wreckage gets fixed.

Go Pam! Pam has clocked a good 175 miles over the past 3 days. Whew!

Not a smooth luxurious ride like that lexus. No sir. But that little car know it gets on down the road!

I have been lazy about getting the 150,000 mile service on Pam. It is 1000 miles overdue, so I took Friday morning off and went and got it done. The car was in good shape, so that's a good thing. No extra work needed, just the preventative stuff. Amazing how I get the lead out of my butt when the other car went down, and do what I have to do for this little car. Must. do. Better.

My doctor's appointment went okay. I was a tad bit apprehensive about going because we were butting heads at my last appointment in January. I did some things she needed me to do over the past couple of months, and I am happy about that. I know she is too.

I went into the examination room and saw this.


Now when on earth did they start putting nice comfy chairs in the exam rooms? Is this a new trend?

Like I said, the appointement went well. No arguing this time. I hope it stays that way.

Saturday.  Saturday was my best friend LadyTee's 45th birthday.

I made a card.


And we went out to eat.

Here's her plate of food.


That's a LOT of seafood. Deviled crab, whitefish, shrimp and oysters. She took half of that home!

I posted a food picture just to make you hungry! LOL

I will do a big post on that some time this week.

Picture of the week. So, one day last week, I came home to see a new plank in the fence.
That makes me smile. The girl that bought the house next door is trying to flip it. Everyone was using the yard as shortcut to the next street (yes, they tore out the back fence when they raided the empty house, which is still standing empty).

A plank on my side had fallen. I would use the handle of my hedge clippers to nail it back up. That was never good enough, because it wouldn't be long before it would come aloose again. But they put up a new plank. Nope, it's not the same color wood, but who cares. It was a good gesture.

My mood was foul when I woke up. Some of that started yesterday. I think I am PMSing. And then I spent a lot of my weekend taking in the first two seasons of this show on Netflix:


Oh, that show is depressing. It's very good, but depressing. I have decided that it is some type of kicked up soap opera. There are a group of humans trying to survive together, and some of them have deep emotional issues... and in the midst of all this, a few zombies amble through and chase and eat people. Oh how depressing.

And most of the drama involves people from the group wandering off... and now everyone has to go look for them. And oh yeah, they have to dodge that gang of zombies ambling through who chase and eat you. Interesting.

I wouldn't be a good person to have in the group. I don't play very well with others in my space for long periods of time. And I'm not walking off in the woods looking for people who get wander off.  No sir.

Very good show. But I watched too much of it. I needed to watch something happy.

I think I was a little sad too because my aunt came to town and I didn't know about. My sister called and talked of the day she, my aunt and my mother spent together. It makes me sad sometimes that I am not apart of that. But when I work to rid my life of a bunch of drama, well, I don't get a chance to attend many family outings. But I told my sister I was glad that she got a chance to spend time with her and and our mother. My sister deals with a huge amount of drama (and Lord knows I have to pick her hurt feelings up off the ground on a regular basis, which is a vein of stress to me in itself), but she is determined to have some family time somehow. And that's a good thing.  And I am glad that my aunt and mother are somewhat getting along. That's good also. Sometimes, I miss having some sense of family. That's all.

I woke up in a foul mood, but after a couple of hours, a little reading, and some prayer, and just examining and dealing with my feelings, I feel much better.  Much better.

I am looking forward to having a great day... on purpose.

You do the same.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Lucy!!!!!!! Uggggh!!!! *faints*


Lucy!!!!

Oh my beloved Lexus Lucy!!!!!!!

*hand to forehead in grief*

I crashed my beloved Lucy the Lexus!!!!



Oh goodness. Ya'll know how much I love Lucy!

Oh Lucy!

It wss written up as being my fault. Myself and the other driver where coming around a sharp up curve on a thin laned street and I was cited for not maintaining my lane.

Mind you, the other driver was driving a HUGE tow truck. Not the one that tows cars, but the one that tows big vehicles. HUGE. So big that when it you see it drive down a street with skinny lanes you wander out loud..."What on earth is he doing on this street?? Let me stay back because that truck is too close to the lane line!"

Anyway, his wheel spurs hit the back rear tire of my car when we were taking that sharp upcurve.

Man... that was the worse sound I've ever heard in my life! There was construction in that area, and the big metal road bandaids were in the road. I thought one of those suckers had come aloose and I had fell through the ground. It even flashed across my mind that I was falling through a sinkhole!!

(funny the stuff that goes through your mind when the unexpected is happening!)

I pulled over and jumped out the car and looked at the damage.

"Lucy!!!!!!!"


*drops to knees*

"Oh my beloved Lucy!!!!!!!!!!!!"


"Lucy, Lucy.... LUCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

*passes out on the hard concrete*

Oh, that hurt so bad to see my car all messed up like that... OHHH it hurt!!

*weeping all over again*

No, I didn't act like that. We called the police, and discussed what happened. I didn't see anything. I was busy trying to fall back a little from the car that was in the lane next to me. You know how it is when you spot a person who has NO idea where he is going... and you know that they might just get the unction to make a left hand turn from a far right lane.
UGH!!

And there were no witnesses.

And the tow truck driver looked like Santa Claus. How do you argue with Santa Claus?

Sigh.

He said I was on the line. And that is all jacked up since his Tow truck hardly fits in one lane. Sigh.

So I got charged with the accident.

The guy was cool, though. He rummaged through my trunk and pulled out my spare and change the tire. He knocked off some of the shrapnel debris. I gave him 10 bucks for doing that. (You know how I make sure I sow some seed. ESPECIALLY in the midst of some craziness. That dude coulda jumped out his truck and shot me.... but he didn't. Thank God for that.)

I didn't even know that I had a full size tire for a spare in the trunk. Imagine that.

But poor Lucy!!!

We had a most delightful conversation while waiting a hour for the police.

I drove Lucy home VERY slowly. It drives fine and straight, but when I went over a bump or through a bad patch of road, there was some scraping of the tire against the wheel base. So I decided that I will just park it until it it time to take it to the body shop next Thursday.

I have the full coverage, and that is good. I told the customer service rep that I want the type of insurance that if an alien fell out the sky and picked my car up and flew away with it... then I could get reimbursed.  LOL

(Couldn't you see me hollering and screaming when an alien snatches up my car.... then calmly calling the insurance company and saying... "Ya'll need to cut me a check. Thank you").

So it will get repaired. I hope they don't total it. The guys at work say that's not gonna happen. I hope not.

I would absolutely faint if they did. Because...

I LOVE LUCY!!!

Yes, I would faint. And tear my clothes and hair out. Then calmly say "Ya'll need to cut me a check. Thank you."

LOL

I went on home, and I said a prayer in the driveway while removing my things from the car. Then I went in and made up a praise song and had me a good ol' fashioned praise service around my kitchen island.

Oscar-Tyrone was staring at me as I sang and moved all about...

"Oh Lord I thank yoooooou... That I can walk, walk, walk, and I can kick, kick, kick, and I can twist, twist, twist... Oh Lord I thank you...."

*clap*clap*church shout*clap*clap*church jog around the kitchen*clap*clap*clap*

I just sang myself happy.

Because you know like I say all the time... People leave for work everyday...

And they don't make it home. Because they die in a car accident.

So even though I am inconveinced, I am alive. I walked into my house without injury. Lucy will be taken care of one way or another. But I walked away without a scratch.  Not one scratch.

"Oscar-Tyrone?" I said.

He meowed.

"I am calling a fast tonight. I am calling a fast of thanksgiving!"

He didn't look too pleased.

He was standing near his empty food bowl.

And he had that look that said "I don't care what fast you do. You just better be fast about popping a top on the cat food can and feeding me!"

"Dude, this fast is for me, not for you," I said as I mixed his special food with water and placed it in his bowl.

I sat his bowl of food on the floor. He was quite pleased.


And I had a very good evening, despite the car wreck. I took special joy in doing my nightly chores and the other things on my to-do list for the evening.

It felt good not to be laying up in a hospital somewhere after a wreck. I was thank for that.

It has been an interesting week. An interesting week indeed.

Hopefully we can get Lucy back right.

And if not... I will call up my sister...

And we'll just go buy another Lucy - Lucy, Jr.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Semi-Wordless Wednesday: Nasty Chips!

Have you had these?


Nasty!

They taste like someone squeezed a bag of limes into a bag of potato chips.

Nasty!

Glad I bought the grab bag instead of the family sized bag!

Monday, March 18, 2013

Happy Dreary Monday Morning

Happy Dreary Monday, ya'll.

I am not dreary. But it looks all dreary outside today in the ATL. It's suppose to rain really hard during rush hour traffic this evening. I am NOT happy about that, because you know we ATLiens can 't drive as it is. And when it rains, sleets or snows? My goodness. There will be quite a few accidents scattered all around the city. Sigh. I plan to dodge them all indeed!

Weekend. I had a great weekend. First of all, the weather was PERFECT. I didn't even really need a jacket! You know that's all good.

I've had myself on a good schedule for the past two weeks. Lo and behold, I have figured out a way to get rid myself of rushed and stressful mornings, and how to keep my house straight during the week. That has worked out well, and I will continue to improve, with the goal of using my weekends to clean out and get rid of junk and stuff I just don't use anymore. It amazes me how I collect so much stuff. I am from a family of hoarders, so I better get a handle on that now before I carry on the family traditions!

Mzinspiredmind was in town, so I had quite a few chances to hang out with her and her wonderful kids. (They are the most mannerable children I've ever met. What a surprise. I wanted to send their Mama home, and keep them with me, lol). I even saw my sister Kentucky and blogger Tazzee!

*backflips*

A great time was had by all. Come back to my city soon, Babes! I'd love to see ya again :)

Grandma. Oh goodness. My beloved little 4'11" Grandma. Sigh. We have been dealing with some debit card ratchetness as of late. Seems like she lost some, and had to get new ones. My aunt has power of attorney or something like that. That touched the account that I have with Grandma. So I had to get a new card for her and make sure everything was under my address.

The strange thing is that she couldn't remember her debit card number. I am not sure why she changed it from something we agreed upon. But she did. And couldn't remember the pin number. She gave me three different pins, and you should've seen me at the Wal-Mart trying to use her card. That was hilarious. Luckily, one of the numbers she gave me was the right one. Now let's just hope she remembers it. I may have to just give her some cash each month. That way she doesn't have to think about the card.

I may do that.

Anyway, before I delivered her new debit card to her, I stopped by Ba.nkhead Seafood.
 Grandma loves good fried fish. And this place serves up the best.


You get all of that for $5. And that includes your tax. That's a ton of fish. And there's a hushpuppy or two in there somewhere.

Yes. For only $5. They don't strike me as the type of folks who care to count out pennies, nickels, quarters, and dimes. Paper money only. Thank you.

And they don't keep the money up front. Seems like they keep it in the back where they fry the fish. I bet if you go back there trying to rob them, they will kick your butt good fashion. Either that or shoot your tail.

I thought they only sold fish. But they don't. Hmmm... here's a shot of the menu.


They are only open 4 days a week for only 5 hours at a time... or until they run out of fish. So you may be cutting it close if you head up in there around 2:00 pm. Sigh.

I didn't want any fish. But I wanted the 5 for a $1 hushpuppies, though. They have really good hushpuppies.

Grandma and I sat at her little yellow formica table in her cramped little kitchen and ate our lunch.

"How you like your fish?" I asked.

"It's goooooooood," she said, she said between bites. "Real Good."

I am sure it was. She and my uncle will be eating that fish for the rest of the week!

And my hushpuppies were great, too.I wish they would let me work in that kitchen for free for a day so I can learn how to make such good hushpuppies.

Song of the Week. Daykeeper by Foreign Exchange.



I like this song. But I must admit, it is a bit ambiguous. They could be talking about relationships. Relationships with your significant other... or with drugs. I have no idea. I like the production.

That is all for this dreary Monday.

And whether it's dreary, sunny, rainy or snowy... I'm gonna make this a good day.

On PURPOSE.

Yes sir. On purpose.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Friday Afternoon Freestyles

Another Friday!

And it's PAYDAY!

GLORY!

I don't know why I'm all excited. Most of that paycheck is going to bills, bills, bills.

And that's alright!

It's hard to believe that we are halfway through March. And even though it's sunny outside here in the ATL, it is still a bit chilly and windy. The current temperature is 37 degrees. The high today will be 71 degrees. You best believe I'm gonna leave the workplace this afternoon and go for a walk. I need to drink up some of this good sunshine.

Well, well, well... You all sure do like some Food-for-Thought posts, don't you? Thanks for all your comments. And you wouldn't believe the number of text messages and emails I got from the folks who lurk on this here blog. That post touched a nerve with a lot of folks. I think we all tend to think that when we are going through something, we are the only ones going through. But the fact is that there are a multitude of people who can relate to our issues.

There's nothing new under the sun. Be encouraged by the fact that there are folks that have gone through something similar to your ordeal, and they have overcome it all and gone on to do great things.

That post was a deluxe edition... no baby formula, you see. That was some strong meat. A lot to take in. But it did my heart some good, too. It always gives me great pleasure to sow some good words your way :)

That post came from about 30% of my convo that day. I might share a little more with you next week. Something on the subject of how to handle out-of-control emotions and feelings.  Hmm... Ya'll know I'm continuously working on my violence and anger management isshas, right? Your Oldgirl LadyLee has come a long way over the years. Still got a ways to go. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm in charge at work today. The Excellent Boss decided to take a day off. I was too O_O to throw a hissy fit. I gladly accepted the challenge. I hope she has a great day off.  Nothing like a three-day weekend!

As a result, I will be doing little work in the lab today. I am reading reports and watching movies. I have had to go in the lab to direct some prep work and answer questions, but that is all.

This week was interesting. Folks been all O_o about me getting some iron infusions done. Ya'll more upset than I am about it. And I'm not even upset. I feel just fine. I am a little perturbed that a half a point below normal iron levels in my blood is causing such a fuss with my doctor. She sent me to a hematologist to get some extra blood work. I went on... reluctantly.

I am glad I did. We went over my blood work on Wednesday, the day of this scheduled iron IV. Man... I learned sooooo much about blood. That post yesterday would have been 10 times longer than it already was.

I had 4 pages of blood work. 4 PAGES. What the world? We went over all of it. I can see why my immunologist sent me that way. She wanted to make sure nothing strange was causing that dip on iron count. Mind you, I feel fine. I wasn't all worn out and tired. But she wanted to check anyway. I am glad she fussed at me long enough to make me go.

Man oh man... there is stuff in the blood that I can't even pronounce. I was so intrigued by our whole discussion I almost hollered....

"I want to be a hematologist like you!"

(LOL. Can you imagine me going back to school? No way, man. I'm already a doctor. I will not be sitting in anyone's classroom!)

I was gonna get a book so that I could have an intelligent conversation with this doctor next week. But uh, those books cost around $350-$1200.

Uh, yeah. That is alright. I will just schlep around on wikipedia or somethin. LOL

I took some pictures.

There's the IV and saline in my arm.


There's my "iron juice".


There's the iron juice going in my arm!


O_o. Make ya'll good and squeamish by putting up extra large pictures. LOL

That was an interesting experience. It took 5 HOURS. Because of the lupus, I have to always do premedication type stuff before any procedure, no matter how menial it may be. I even have to do that before I go to the dentist. No one wants a chick experiencing a flare on their hands. Goodness. So I understand. A little annoying, but I understand. I have never had any issues. They were watching me like a hawk on Wednesday though.

After 5 hours, I was ready to go. I was giving the receptionist the hard sideeye when she told me to have a seat and she would get to me in a moment. I almost skipped out on her!

I ran to my car real quick. I didn't want them calling me back, lol.

I started up the car and the CD changer was flipping to a new CD. One of my favorite rap songs blasted through the speakers.



I know they had to be looking out the window and hollering "Who is that out there beatin' like that? Call the police!"

Yes. Lucy the Lexus' premium sound system can be heard all the way to outerspace. Yes ma'am. And that's GREAT!

I was long gone before the cops could run up on me for disturbing the peace.

Because I was hungry, you see. I hadn't had a thing to eat sense the night before. And it was 3:30 pm by that time. I'd been at the doctor's office since 9:30 am. Sigh.

I went to the Golden Corral and scored a vegetable plate!

That's a pretty good plate. I needed something red or purple on there, though. It would've been perfect then. Talk about something good, good, good! I couldn't even eat it all! I had the itis!

I arrived home just to catch some Judge Judy.  And a well deserved nap.

I don't feel much different than I did before the iron drip. Maybe a little increase in energy. But I was expecting to be fighting crime like Wonder Woman or something. LOL.

Hopefully this ordeal makes my doctor happy. I just want to keep kicking, stomping and turning cartwheels on a daily basis!

LOL

I am looking forward to a great weekend! It's gonna be quite lovely in the ATL. I plan to get out and run some errands and do a little walking and what not, amongst other things.

I'm gonna make it a good weekend indeed... ON PURPOSE.

You make it a good one, too.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Food for Thought Deluxe: Never Stagnant (Never Stagnasty Either)

I’m living in a pretty interesting time of my life right now… Very interesting.

I can’t remember a day in the recent past, meaning, in the past few months to a year, where a day has not gone by where I haven’t had the opportunity to impart some wisdom or advice in the life of others… or where someone hasn’t imparted wisdom or advice into my own life.

Sometimes this happens multiple times per day. And when that happens? That’s what I call a good day.

That makes me feel very rich. Not in money, but in knowledge, wisdom, heart, love and power.

And it increases daily. I am getting to the point where I wake up with a sense of expectancy.

I tell you… What more can your friendly neighborhood Oldgirl ask for?

Because you know what? This Oldgirl needs all the wisdom and advice that she can handle. I’m like a bottomless pit when it comes to advice and wisdom. I soak it up like a sponge. I squeeze that sponge out into my mental databank somewhere… and come back and soak up some more.

Anyway, I was talking to someone last Saturday morning about some things. She’d said the night before that she’d cried herself to sleep. I told her that if she needed to talk, I was here.

I think she even woke up crying. What the world?

I feel her, though. Because Lord knows that I’ve cried myself to sleep many a time. And I’ve woke up crying. So I understand.

She is a little like me—keeps whatever bothers her close to her heart. I respect that.

I understand that too.

On Saturday morning, she text me about some of her issues. (Note: I asked permission to post this. She said I could. I could even use her name. Uh... she will remain unnamed).

I know I’m a good ten years older than her. So I understand some of her issues. I’d been through the same thoughts, feelings and emotions. I was able to offer her some extra special “food for thought”.

One issue she had, that I myself and many others have from time to time is this:

“I feel so stagnant.”

Sigh.

I felt for my homegirl.

I too have felt stagnant.

But when I get to feeling that way, I have to give myself a mental wedgie. I have to lace up my spiritual bootstraps. And be quick about it too.

Stagnant can turn into Stagnasty… real quick, you see.

(Yes. I did go make up a word. I sure did. I'll discuss that much later).

And you know me… I am not the most well read girl in the world, so I like to clearly define my words.

Stagnant – not moving or flowing; motionless; showing little or no sign of activity or advancement; not developing or progressing; inactivity.

Stagnant has several synonyms – stale, still, standing, quiet, sluggish, motionless, brackish, inactive, flat, slow, depressed, slow-moving.

Man… none of those words make my heart leap for joy. None.

There’s no wonder that when people cry “I am stagnant”, it is a fully loaded statement. It is drenched in tears. It’s covered in sheets of pain and sadness. It will have you so depressed that you will feel like you will never see the light at the end of the tunnel ever again.

And when you do see the light at the end of the tunnel, it’s not the end of the tunnel It's not the way to freedom. It’s a fast moving train coming straight at YOU.

Yes, feelings of stagnancy can get that bad for some folks.

I posed a question to her. It’s one that I pose to my ownself very often.

First of all, let me digress and explain something about myself. I am a scientist. I have a doctorate degree in organic chemistry. I am interdisciplinary, meaning I have done research and published papers in several scientific areas.

And I am spiritual. I don’t necessarily care for organized religion, but I go to church, pray, study my bible, etc. That is waaaay more important to me than my scientific training. Mind you, I’ve been embroiled in all things science since the age of 16, when I started college. I am 43 now. That’s a ton of science. I’m reading a book on quantum mechanics, string theory, and relativity right now (I have a minor in Physics, so I like to do a little, uh, casual reading in that area, in my spare time).

So, as you could imagine, I think of everthing from a spiritual AND a scientific standpoint. You may ask, how is that so, since the two are polar opposites? Well, I’m a scientist to the utmost degree. So my thinking tends to swirl around in that direction. At the same time, I am a spiritual person.

And I believe that everything is born out of the spiritual. Including the scientific.

I’ll let you go chew on that and debate amongst yourselves. That’s just my personal philosophy. Sorry, but that piece of paper you are writing on didn’t appear out of thin air. It came from a tree. That tree went through various processes to become paper. And somebody formed a thought in their head that maybe we can take this tree and make paper from it.

Everything starts with a mere seed of a thought.

And that tree came from a seed that had been sown in the ground.

And if you’ve been reading here for awhile, you know how I am about sowing seed.

Boy, my eyes are stretched, trying to sow a seed. Sow a seed of cash, wisdom, kindness, help, advice… SOMETHING good. Yes sir. I figured all that out in my 20s, honey.

That is all… You needed to know that so that you could understand what I am about to relate to you.

Back to our subject matter.

Anyway, I offered her some advice.

Advice I give my own self when I get to feeling stagnant.

You’re never stagnant.

I’m never stagnant.

“Your hair and nails grew overnight. They are growing right now as we speak. But you can’t tell. Just because you can’t tell doesn’t mean it isn’t happening.”

She agreed with that.

And that is coming from someone like me, who has an alopecia component to her lupus. I haven’t cut my hair since June 2010. (I do some bootleg trimming with a rusted pair of scissors, but not a real hair cut). My hair grows at a really slow rate. So over the past year and a half, it has grown approximately an inch.

It has grown slower than your hair.

But understand this: no matter how slow my hair grows, it hasn’t been stagnant.

I asked her, “Did you get up this morning and piss?”

She responded yes. With a giggle.

I told her that while she was asleep, her body worked hard. It very precisely identified all the bad and dead cells, repaired damaged cells, and generated new ones. It even identified potentially cancerous cells. It ushered all those dead, badly, damaged and potentially cancerous cells to your blood stream, and directed it to the kidneys.

And when you got up this morning?

You pissed all that out… along with other contaminants… contaminants expertly and precisely identified by your body and targeted for elimination.

And you did all that without not even thinking about it. It was all an involuntary process.

When you are asleep, in your seemingly most still and “stagnant” state of being, your body was far from stagnant.

Very far.

“We’re never stagnant.”

Never.

Her response was “*gulps*. Yes ma’am.”

She may have been thinking… “That LadyLee… she know she is a bit out there. She think too hard about stuff. ”

Whatever, baby. Maybe I am. But I’m just offering you a different perspective. You can take it, toss it around, chew on it, use it or trash it if you want.

Do with it what you like.

Know this: In the time that it took me to write this post (a couple of hours), the earth has traveled approximately 135,000 miles on its path of revolution around the sun. The earth rotated on its axis some 2000 miles.

Yet we can’t even tell. Of course, if we pay attention to the position of the sun during the day, we can tell. But have you noticed that we don’t really care about all that? However, we DO pay attention to when it’s daytime and when it’s nighttime. The difference between the day and night is very apparent, very stark.

We pay more attention to stark changes than we do to subtle changes.

That translates over to life in general. We’re never stagnant. Something’s always happening. Always. We are more in tune with the rapid changes… and we don’t celebrate the subtle and quiet changes.

I don’t know about you, but that’s how I get to feeling sometimes. And I have to remind myself that it’s all important.

I penned a post a few years ago about the movement of the space shuttle from wherever they store it to the launching pad. It takes six hours to move it 2 miles. If that’s not “stagnant”, I don’t know what is.

Subtle slow speed… but progress was made. There was a starting point and there was a destination. If the shuttle was moved too fast, some of the expensive and delicate mechanical parts could get messed up, so it had to be moved SLOWLY. If not, something would break. And we can't have the shuttle busting up in space, can we? We've seen what happens already when stuff goes wrong with the shuttle! Hmm.

I’ll let you find the parallel to life in that one.

I didn’t fully realize this and appreciate it until I was about to turn 40, and I pondered my own life. I am not a rich woman. I am not a beautiful woman (well, I am beautiful to me, lol). I don’t have everything that everyone wants. I’m just me. Your friendly neighborhood Oldgirl, LadyLee.

But, I broke out crying several times as I thought of all that had gone on with me between the ages of 30 and 40. There were way too many times during that span of time that I complained of feeling stagnant. But I was far from such. Over 10 years- over 3,650 days, mind you- I’d had more joy, pain, triumphs, trials, tribulations, hurts, dreams, disappointments, learning experiences, fears, growth and achievements than I can count or even remember.

There was this wondrous mix of things going on. In 10 years. We not talking about all 43 years of my life. Just that 10. To think of what has gone on in the past 43 years would make me pass out.

Goodness gracious alive.

The point was… I was never stagnant.

At that moment, I realized that the only time you’re stagnant is when you die.

I’m not dead. That means I’m not stagnant.

The human body completely regenerates itself on a cellular level every seven years. That means no cell in my body is older than 7 years old. You know this has to be true on some level because whenever you shower, there is some dead skin that comes off and you gotta wash out your tub. You scratch up on your face right now and some dead skin comes off on your fingernails. And the body kicks in and creates new skin cells.

O_o.

The body is a wonderful specimen, constantly repairing and regenerating and making new cells.

Never stagnant. NEVER.

I know when I am feeling the most “stagnant”, a few flags start flying. Some red alerts, if you wanna call them that.

It is an alert to pause and think. And I ask myself a question (well, several questions): What is it that I am suppose to be learning at this very moment? Am I standing still because I need to grow in a particular area? Are some of my decisions I am making or have made causing this stagnancy? Are there any immediate steps I can take to break up this monotony? Can I identify someone who has gone through the same thing and get some advice?

I ask myself many more questions. I won’t list them. But that list above is a healthy start to breaking and busting up the fallow ground of personal stagnancy, isn’t it? I think it is. For me, at least.

And I know me. I have to get to work and ask myself the hard questions. And step out and take immediate action.

If not, I become stagnasty.

Yeah man. That’s the word I made up earlier in the post.

You know, stagnasty. Like water that’s been sitting around for too long.

You’ve seen standing water… water that’s just there, just stagnant, not flowing or moving.

If left along long enough and not treated or whatever, it starts to smell. Stuff starts growing in it. It gets slimy. It’s just nasty.

Stagnasty.

And you better not drink it! You better not! If you do, you’re gonna get sick, babes. Sick as a dog.

If we don’t address the roots of our stagnant feelings about ourselves, we may become stagnasty like that water.

I am pretty much convinced that people who are problematic… you know, people who cause emotional and mental carnage in the life of others around them, people who always got something to say about other peoples’ choices and lives… People who always at the center of a bunch of mess.

Yeah, those type of people.

I am convinced there is some area of stagnancy in their lives. An area that has been there for a long time, one that they haven’t dealt with. And they’re trying to deal with it in the wrong way.

Stagnancy is painful.

And people in pain tend to try to deal with their pain by hurting other people. People who can't control their emotions tend to try to control the emotions of others. That’s stagnasty right there. Your stagnancy gets to a point where it affects not only you, but it infects all the people around you.

And I’m sorry, but that’s just jacked up.

And I think our times of feeling “stagnant” are gonna get worse before they get better. I submit that we are living in a very interesting time. Very interesting. We are living at a time where information and all that we want is at our fingertips.

I was getting an iron infusion today, which took about 4 hours (geesh!). I had my smartphone, my kindle and my netbook all going. (I almost brought my touch notepad laptop, but uh… that woulda been too much, lol). I was listening to some music (O’Jays whooo hooo!), texting back and forth with a couple of folks, doing some writing, reading some blogs, and watching movies on my kindle… all at the same time.

You couldn’t do all that 10 years ago. Heck, you couldn’t do all that 5 years ago.

Technology and the information from it is fast. And you do realize they are about to come out with the computer eyeglasses. And the prototypes of contact lenses that let you text from your eye are already being tested (How on earth is THAT going to work?).

Yet there are things in life that still take time to do.

Like personal growth.

Finding your soulmate (permanent, not this fly by night foolishness).

Permanent weight loss (and I mean permanent).

Breaking addictions (just say no, ya’ll. It’s harder than that).

Forming new good habits (permanent ones, not this trendy stuff).

Coming back and working your way out of bad choices and bad decisions (that is painful for me).

And whatever else you can think of.

A blog sister is teaching me a LOT about the importance of our timing versus God’s timing and the specific order of the heart’s desires and much much more. In the midst of all this life- this fast life of ours- we may be having those feelings of time to time of stagnancy. I know she does. But she works through it. With the desired results running her down like a freight train. (Whoo. That sista preaching so good, I almost dropped her a 40 page email. But I’ma leave you alone, girl. You know who you are. I’m gonna leave you alone. Cuz I don’t want you to think I’m crazy. I’ll just sit here and watch and listen and learn and crochet very fast. Very fast.).

We’re not stagnant at all. We’re never stagnant.

It’s not only the journey that’s important. But it’s the thousands of little things we learn along the way that is most important of all. Check this out: we may have needed all of that so called stagnancy in order to properly take care of and handle those things we desired at the journey’s end. All the things you learned in the process may be critical to not only obtaining, but maintaining the desired goal.

Hmm… A food for thought, within a food for thought. Sigh.

Life has gotten faster. So when such things and special areas of our lives that need specific attention and nurturing don’t move as fast, we become overwhelmed with feelings of stagnancy. Well, I know I do.

Life is getting faster and faster and faster. And time seems to be getting shorter and shorter. Not enough time to get things done. Mind you, there are the same amount of hours in this day as it was on the very day you were born.

I am old enough to remember when I had to go to the encyclopedia or card catalog for information. I remembering having to buy stamps so I can mail my bills. I remember seeing a payphone and jumping out to call someone. I remember sitting down and writing letters to friends and mailing them.

Fast forward to the present. Mess around and let that smartphone not be working fast enough. Let that laptop move a tad bit too slow. Mess around and let my movie on my Kindle stall out. I have a conniption fit.

It’s no wonder when things I want, growth-wise and lifewise in general, don't happen fast enough, I began to have feelings of stagnancy.

That is when I have to chin-check myself. And remind myself that I’m not stagnant. Things might not be happening fast enough, but you know what? They are happening.

I’m NEVER stagnant. Never.

I’m praying. I stretching my faith out there. I’m doing the personal self-examination. I’m identifying what I need to do. I am thinking about what I want to see happen. I’m writing down goals and plans. I’m using resources. I’m doing all kinds of things. Some of those areas are weak. I have a chance to shore up in those areas. Never stagnant.

And get this, and this is something I figured out years ago: I thank God in advance for the breakthrough that I’m looking for. Whether it’s breaking some ratchet habit, or believing for some need to be met, or something I desire, etc.

I have hollered many a time when something manifests, “This ain’t no surprise to me! I’ve been working on this! Been thanking God in advance. No surprise when it shows up!”

MANY a time.

Might as well. Better than sitting around crying about it. Hear me now, believe me later… I give myself time to whine and cry. But the older I get, the shorter that time gets. I have a long laundry list of accomplishments. I unroll that proverbial list and read it from time to time and remind myself that all things are possible.

Can’t cry too long though, babes. I don’t wanna morph into stagnastiness, now.

Because Faith is the evidence of things not seen, the substance of things hoped for. Might as well get busy using it, stretching it, and testing that out. Give God a positive attitude to work with, man.

Don’t get me started on that. Time to wind this post down.

Just a LadyLee theory… and general observation about people around me.

And most importantly, an observation about myself, and the things I do to avoid being… stagnasty.

That’s the word of the day. Use it in a sentence, why don’t ya??

LOL!!

So I hope I was helpful to my friend. I think our text messaging lasted some 4.5 hours? And that is cool with me. I think I washed clothes, cleaned the kitchen, did some crocheting… all kinds of things in that time period.

All the while, working to be an asset to my friend.

I hope I was helpful to her.

And this was a long post. 3145 words. If you made it through all my pontifications and ebonics, you deserve an award! I shoulda put out a $100 gift card Stagnasty Sweekpstakes or something for comments, shouldn’t I have?

And the winner of that card woulda been ME. LadyLee.

LOL. That’s the ultimate in cheating.

I hope you found something helpful to you.

This was a “note”to myself. A long one, mind you.

And it was a note to my homegirl with whom I had that long text conversation with. I know it's hard for her to talk about her issues. We have that trait in common. I am glad she trusted me that day.

All scrawled high upon the washed white walls of The House of LadyLee.

I hope I built her heart and mind up that day. But she may need to come back and read this in the future whenever she becomes overwhelmed with feelings of stagnancy.

I know I will have to.

Really though.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Happy Monday Morning Freestyles

Happy Monday Morning to you!

I am feeling a little O_o. This time change, man. Bleeeeehhhhhh...

I think everybody is having problems. I drove into our parking garage at work and there were a lot of cars missing. It was only 2/3rds full. So I guess a lot of people took the day off to adjust.

I had a pretty good weekend. Quiet. I ended up coming to work for on Sunday for a couple of hours. That wasn't too bad. You would be proud of me... it was a favor to my coworker so he could finish up some things. I wasn't even surly about it. Glory! I am growing up!

LOL

Nothing much interesting going on. A lot of movies are shot around my job, and on the way to work this morning, I drove through a movie shoot. I don't think we get all excited about those things anymore. A couple of months ago, though, the condos next door were the setting for a movie with Morgan Freeman, Robert DeNiro, and Michael Douglas. There were a lot of stunt trucks out front. Not sure what that was about. Now, I was stretching my neck trying to see what was going on. I wanted Morgan Freeman's autograph!

Last year, Tyler Perry was filming on our block. I think it was the new Marriage Counselor movie coming out soon.  Blogger Mzinspiredmind wanted me to take a picture.

I found it in my phone.

That's as good as it gets, honey! I didn't see anybody we would know. There were 2 people fussing hard in that scene. I wanted to run up and holler "Stop all this here fightin'! Stop it, I say! Family shouldn't be fighing like this!"

LOL.  Cops would've thrown me to the ground quick!

Flowers. I bought some flowers for the coffee table this weekend. Whole Foods had tulips on sale for 3 bucks.

They look a little shy here.
But morning arrived and they began to open a little.
Later in the day, they were open wide!
How beautiful!

I hope they have another sale. Maybe I'll buy flowers for easter!

Video of the week. Outkast's "Liberation"




I LOVE Outkast. Love, love, love them. And we are all from that College Park/East Point area... That makes it even better.

Funny story how I first found out about them. The ex-hubby, who was my boyfriend at the time, came home from his security job down on Peachtree Street somewhere, and threw a cassette tape on the table.

"These young boys were walking down the street giving out tapes. They asked if I wanted one, and I told them no, but my girl listens to gangsta rap, so I'll take it to her."

I remember staring at the tape. "You always bringing home some ol' bootleg tape. I'll listen to it, though. Might be a good song on there that I can dub to a blank tape."

I listened to Outkast's SouthernPlayalisticCadillacMusik a few days later... and was blown away!

They have come along just fine over the years and really evolved since the early 90s!

Anyway, I love the "Liberation" song. I definitely keep it in my playlist.

Well, a new week is upon us. Easter will be here before you know it. I hope everyone has their easter dresses and suits together!

I'm going to have a good productive week... On purpose!

You do the same!

Friday, March 08, 2013

Friday Freestyles


Happy Friday To YOU!

I am glad it's Friday. It's not even payday. And that's alright. It is Friday.

You know, I woke up before the crack of dawn on Tuesday morning. I gathered the down comforter to my chin and said "I'm so glad it's Saturday. I don't have to get out of this bed."

LOL! Man! What kind of craziness is that? Ohhhhh how disappointed I was when I realized it was only Tuesday. Wow!

Alas,I will be able to say that tomorrow. Even though I do have to get up and get a few things done early in the morning. At least I don't have to be at work.

But I have work on Sunday. O_o.

I don't even want to talk about that right now. Humph.

Anyway, it has been a good week. Interestingly, I've been very productive at home. I have put myself on a plan to clean up daily instead of waiting around for the weekend. So this weekend I have less to do. If I can stick with this plan, I will be able to do some deeper cleaning and reorganizing and throwing out. That's the ultimate goal.

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Not with my regular doctor, but with a hematologist. I was a bit pissed about that, because I really didn't need to go. But my immunologist is a stickler about checking everything. So I begrudgingly went.

I'm glad I did. The hematologist was a sister, and she was really cool. She understood lupus pretty well. I have some strange blood numbers (that have been that way for years, mind you), and she's gonna try to bring them back under correction. I don't have any iron stored (again, been that way for years, mind you), and so she wants to work on that.

I haven't had anemia problems in a long time. For some strange reason it went away when I moved towards vegetarianism. But I had a test come back in January that was slightly out of order (I took that test after my cycle ended. Ladies, you know we can't even give blood at the blood bank after a cycle. Iron is low, mind you. Not sure why my doctor is all O_O. My iron was only 1/2 a point out of range. Sigh).

We were looking at my January blood work and it turns out my kidneys are excellent! So much for the kidney disease. That looks to be under control. No signs of it.

GLORY. *church shouts*

I am making an effort this year not to be all cantankerous... I really want to just work on doing what the doctor tells me to do. And to be expedient about it. We've been talking about physical therapists for a good two years now. I need one, so I am still looking for that. I don't care for that process. But I need a little help with some excerises.

I am thankful that after 10 years after diagnosis that I am functional. No hospital stays since 2002. No wheelchairs, canes or walkers. The lupus is active, but it isn't severe. It is in the light range.

And I am thanful I am still here. I am thankful for every day.

I feel just fine. And I will contiune to feel fine. That is all.

AMEN.

Other than that, all is well. Work has been slow, but productive!

Fruit of the Week. I bought a honeydew melon last weekend. So I've been trying to eat on that.


 It is good and it is sweet and flavorable. But I had to balance it out with some strawberries and mangoes. Talk about something good, good, good!

Vegetable of the Week. That should read strange vegetable of the week.
Those are tindora cucumbers. I threw my sharpie in with them to show how small they are. I never heard of cucumbers that small. Is that what the gherkin sweet pickles are made from? I'm not sure. And what are a couple of them turning red??

Quote of the week. From Power Thoughts: 12 strategies to Win the Battle of the Mind by Joyce Meyer

"Modern societies are full of messages that say to us, "Something is wrong with you because you are not like I am. Something is wrong with you because you can't do this as well as I can." So we repeatedly hear the message, "what's wrong with me?" "What's wrong with me?" "What's wrong with me?" After hearing it long enough, we get convinced something is desperately wrong with us and we become disabled emotionally. The wrong thinking negatively affects all relationships and everything we try to do."

That is the best thing I've read all week.

The truest thing I've read all week.

Really though.

I'm reading that book with one of my favorite readers. Lots of interesting tail-kicking self examination questions throughout the chapters. It is helping me a lot.

Pictures of the Week. This restaurant is located next to my favorite Thai spot on the southside.


Can you read the words under the name of the restaurant? It says African American Cuisine.

What is "African Amerian Cuisine"? Yeah, I know all about soul food. I suppose that is considered African American Cuisine. So if it is soul food, then whey not cal it that? I don't think it is. They have the american flag and the African continent on the sign. Hmm. Maybe I will run up in there and be nosy the next time I'm over that way.

Whenever someone comes to the desk with a bunch of craziness, I show them my screen saver.

"You see that cat? You see how Oscar-Tyrone is looking?" I ask. "That's how you making me feel right now. You're irking me right about now."

LOL.

Song of the Week. Oldie but Goodie. You have to be over 35 to remember this song from 1985!



Man... Morris Day was so narcissitic. I wonder if he's still that way all these years later.

Whelp! I am looking forward to the weekend! I'm going to make it a good one...

You have a good one too... on purpose!

Thursday, March 07, 2013

The Excellent Boss!


So...

I have an interesting routine most mornings. Most times, I get up and spend a bit of time praying and crocheting. Then I get ready for work.

I'm not the type of chick that just wakes up and be out of the house 30 minutes later. That's not going to happen. I need a full 1.5 to 2 hours to be ready to leave for work.

No, I'm not doing my hair or putting on makeup. I'm not that type of gal. I have to wake up, pray, read, watch the news, make my lunch, read some more, feed and water Oscar-Tyrone, blog, write... all kinds of stuff.

So I have settled into a schedule... of sorts.

I need to be at work around 10. So around 8:30, I like to have my clothes on and hair comb, and I like to be piddling around the kitchen around that time.

Around that time, Joyce Meyer comes on. I like watching her in the mornings. Nothing like a good sermonette to get me thinking.

Anyway, she said something interesting. She was talking about letting people know that you appreciate them versus always finding fault with people. Let's face it, one is much easier than the other.

And she asked an interesting question. She asked when was the last time you told your boss that you appreciated them, and that they did a good job?

I believe I was juicing at the time. I, along with the audience she was preaching too, got real quiet.

What kind of question was that? Didn't she know that Management was the absolute devil, hell bent on making an employee's life absolutely miserable?

"She talking crazy," I murmured. I threw another small apple into the juicer. "I might have to turn this off."

But she went on to make her case. (She had to, since everybody was looking at her like she was an odd bird that had just flew into the room). She said that they have to deal with much that we don't have to deal with. And we should tell them that we appreciate the job they are doing.

A bit far-fetched. But it made a little sense to me.

A little.

Enough for me to think about it long after the program ended and I headed off to work.

So... I swooped into my boss' office.

"Hey!"

She looked at me like I was crazy. Which is usually the case .

"I just want you to know I was watching Joyce Meyer this morning, and she asked when was the last time you told your boss you appreciate them and how good of a job they were doing. I thought I would come in here and just tell you that."

She said nothing. Just stared at me.

"I want you to know that you are excellent! And you do an excellent job!"

She stared for a moment. "Uh, ok."

And with that, I was gone.

That was back in late October. I decided then that I would stay on that for the rest of the year.

Everytime she came to my desk or I ran up on her, she had the pleasure of hearing me holler "You are EXCELLENT! You do such a good job! You sure do!"

I'm not sure this was all that pleasurable for her, as everyone absolutely HATES management. HATES with a passion.

"Thank you for your help! You do such an excellent job!"

"Whatever, man," she has mumbled a number of times... followed by the hard eyeroll.

"I like saying that," I told my cubicle mate, Cowgirl Cre. "It makes me feel good inside! It really does."

She only nodded.

"Maybe you should let your boss know he is excellent, too!"

*Cowgirl Cre's eyes widen big as hoola-hoops*

Her boss... sigh. That dude is special. I'm sure he is excellent. But he is special, first and foremost.

There are people around me who I make sure that they think that I'm just a bit... touched. Just so they won't bother and harrass me. You know, make sure that they think I just a bit off and unpredictable. It saves me a lot of trouble, I tell you.

Yeah, he's one of those types.

And I notice that when Cowgirl Cre needs supervisory assistance, she calls my supervisor. And my supervisor comes over and helps her, and all is well.

Well I don't like this. That is MY boss. MINE.

She was helping Cowgirl Cre one day, and when she finished I had to tell her "Look, don't help her no more. You not her boss. You my boss. She needs to call her own boss. Get that joker to help her."

"I don't care," Cowgirl Cre said with a note of arrogance. "I call her and she comes right over and she knows what to do."

"That's because she's excellent! Call your own boss!"

"I don't care, blah blah blah..." Cowgirl Cre continued.

My boss backed out of our cubicle slowly... but not before kicking the hard eyeroll.

Earlier this week, she was helping the Cowgirl Cre with some word game. I think it was Words with Friends. And it had me seething.

"Look here, man... don't be helping her with spell words. She need to go ask her own boss to help her spell. Cut that out!"

They both looked at me and then went at her smart phone.

HUMPH.

I really do think my boss is excellent. Close to a couple of years ago, we had a management regime shake-up. The evil empire was shook up, and I ended up with a good boss. My old boss is our director, and that's alright. She doesn't make my life miserable and that is cool.

I asked my boss the other day, "Do you lay up in bed at night and try to come up with ways to mess with people and hurt people?"

"No," she said.

Well that makes you excellent in my book!"

Because we had so much of that going on. And it is always odd that management likes to mess with the unstable folks, putting all our lives in danger. It is bad to have that on your mind, but shoot... I will never understand that.

But I understand the gist of Joyce Meyer's message that morning. After a few months of doing that, I understand how far it goes to squeeze out the negative. VERY far. And it takes power away from the negative.

And that is a good thing.

I was in the other building adjoining my own on my job, and I saw some folks in a lab. I wanted to congratulate them on getting some extra workers, as a couple of people had left or retired. Well, they were in there going off hard about what was going on in the building. And you know me, I don't deal much with all the negativity anymore. Well they got into going hard on management.

"My boss is excellent. She actually has a clue. She actually thinks about the problems. And if she don't know the answer, she go get it. And she asks questions. She don't mind learning. And she ain't trying to come up with ways to destroy people!"

"Yeah, you right," they said. "She is good."

Yes. I broke up the negative monotony. Then I got on out of the lab and went back to my own.

From time to time, the Cowgirl Cre will remind me, just when the boss is walking out of the cubicle area... "You forgot to tell her. Remember you gotta tell her."

"Oh yeah," I said. "Hey man!!" I holler. "You are excellent!"

Say it with me. "I am excellent."

"I am excellent," she mumbles... not before kicking the hard eyeroll.

Not all that enthusiastic, she's not. But oh well. But that's alright.

I'm going to stay on it! Yes I am.

She is excellent.

She likes really sad songs. I mean... sad, sad, sad. "I like the songs that make you drink the brown liquor," she said.

She has had me listen to songs she like in the past. They have me like "Dang, man. That's pretty sad right there."

She likes the crying-in your drink in the back booth of the club type of songs. And when I hear one, I let her know. And of course she likes it.

Here's one by Kelly Price. The title is "Tired"




The last part of that song... Lots of agony in those wails!

The boss will find that to be quite... excellent!

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

That Original Oldcat Oscar-Tyrone... Still Hanging in There



It's been awhile since I gave an update on the The Original Oldcat, Oscar-Tyrone.

Way back in October, that Original Oldcat Oscar-Tyrone fell ill.

He has never been sick. And I hate to admit it, but he hadn't been to the doctor since 1999. And the only reason he went then because he and my other cat, Jeremy Girard, had a bad case of worms.

That was nasty.

Anyway, he had a bad case of pancreatitis and hepatitis. And some -itis with his gall bladder. He was running around acting like he was having hallucinations, and he was hurling and had a case of the runs plus constipation. Trust me, it was an odd site to see.

He had to stay in the hospital. Because of him, I won't be going on vacation this year. *gives Oscar the side-eye*. It cost around two grand to straighten him out. Sigh.

Anyway, he had his last doctor visit back in early December. He gained a little weight (1/2 pound), and his liver numbers were going in the right direction (whatever that means).

"Do we need to schedule another meeting?" I asked the veternarian.

She was a sister. I think she could see in my eyes that I didn't want to spend another dime on him.

"No, I think he's good. It takes as much as 6 to 8 weeks to recover from this."

I nodded.

"But I want to keep him on the bland diet," she added.

The bland diet. The bland diet of duck and peas. A case of can food was 61 dollars. And a bag of dried food was 56 dollars.

Sigh.

I nodded. Again.

"He seems to be alright," I said. "He's eating and eliminating on the regular now. I'll know he's back to his normal self when he jumps out and plays on the beams that run over my living room."

She shook her head, and rubbed Oscar-Tyrone's back. "I don't know if that's gonna ever happen again. He's an old cat. The beams may be too much for him."

The beams.


He has always loved the beams. He would sit quietly up there and watch me walk back and forth, especially when I was looking for him.

He likes the beams.

I suppose the vet had a point, though. He is 15 years old. No more beams. I packed him in his carrier and we headed on home. He seems to understand the riding in the car ordeal. He knows if he doesn't want to be flying all over the car, he needs to sit still.

And he seems to understand... don't scratch the Lucy the Lexus' leather. Just be still.

That month he would stare up at the beams. It was if he was... pondering. Pondering whether to test his strength and agility.

He would walk upstairs, and walk back down. You see, for awhile, he'd been working on jumping up on the back of the couch or the big easy chair. And he wasn't negotiating it right. He would jump up... then fall off the back.

It was quite funny. All I could do is holler, as he ambles out from behind wherever he fell, "Dude, you took a big spill there... Are you alright?"

I knew if he couldn't figure out how to lay on the back of the furniture... Then he had no business fooling around with the beams.

Then one day last month...

I was laying on the sofa watching television, half dozing off. Oscar-Tyrone ran top speed up the stairs and jumped out on the beams.

The noise caught my attention. First of all, he hadn't ran that fast in awhile. I had to make sure he wasn't running for something. If he was, I was going to be running right along with him, lol.

And there he was... out on the beams.

"The dead has arisen," I said.

He not only jumped out on the beams, but he got all acrobatic with it. It was like he thought he was a Olympic gymnast or something.


He was doing what he use to do when we first moved into the house: jumping out on the beams and pretending he was going to jump or worse... fall down.

My sister and I would holler "Oscar! Oscar! Don't fall!"

And we would brace ourselves to catch him.

It turned out to be a dirty trick he liked to play on us.

He tried that again and I didn't fall for it. There is a ceiling fan connected to one of the beams, and he was running out on that beam, too. That would have been a disaster if he fell into that fan. But he didn't.

Someone asked how he gets up on the beams. I took a couple of pictures.

He jumps up on the rail next to the laundry here.




And then he jumps out on the beam. the beam is 9 feet above the living room.


So if he falls, that's a big drop. (He or the other cat has fallen before. There is a long scratch on the side. Wish I could've seen that!) And I'm not taking him back to the doctor. I would just have to go outside and break off a branch or stick from the bushes and use it a stint for his leg. I'm sure I have a little duct or electrical tape to hold it all in place.

I guess he is getting back to his old self. That's a good thing. I figure he has a couple more years to live.

He has a cold right now. That whole sneezing thing... he knows that is a good way to get me to head in another direction real fast. I think his teeth may be bothering him. I grind up his hard food and mix it with the canned food and add a little water to it all. That seems to be working out well for him.

And he has hairball issues. Ick. YUCK.

His food bill looks as if it will be running $70 a month. That's on the level of a utility bill or something. I'm not happy about that. But cheap food would probably blow his liver and pancreas up. For now, it is duck and peas.

So that's the update on The Original Oldcat. I am doing what I can to keep him stable.

And now that he is back to his beam gymnastics? I think he might just be coming along just fine.

Just fine indeed.

Monday, March 04, 2013

Monday Food for Thought: Knowing Your Options

I came across this information a few weeks ago. It was part of a sermon on dealing with conflict and difficult people. I wrote it down on the back of an envelope, so it's a tad bit cryptic, but I thought it was interesting.

What to do when dealing with difficult people (conflict resolution):

1. Demand that THEY grow up. Sometimes you are dealing with immature people. Hallmarks of immaturity are selfishness and egocentricity.

2. Demand of YOURSELF that you grow up. A major part of this is that you learn to pick and choose your battles wisely. Do not waste your time arguing and fighting battles unless they threaten your destiny or personal convictions.

3. Demand that THEY move on.

4. Demand of YOURSELF that you move.

The bottom line is that you always have options.


My thoughts on this...

I like that last line:

The bottom line is that you always have options.

And I don't know if people understand that. I myself didn't understand that until I hit my 30s. Up until then there was always this goal of being accepted by people. I am the direct opposite these days: I only want genuine relationships... or nothing at all. Take the drama and conflict somewhere else.

It's alright for me to feel that way.

Afterall... There are 7 billion people walking this earth. I only need a decent handful in my life. I know I can't please everyone. And everyone can't please me. I accept that.

The points above resonated with me. They point to the fact that I have options. I don't have to be held emotionally hostage by anyone. And no one should be held emotionally hostage by me.

In any case, it points to the issue of things having to change. I know people who have been in conflict with the same folks for some 30 to 40 years... most of their lives, really. 

That's a long long time. A long time to be going through mess with people. Part of me admires people that can continuously go through a lot. Even though they are exasperated, they are long suffering. I just don't have that character trait, man. I am a champion of #4... I demand of myself that I move on. Period.  Now, I spend a lot of time thinking about whether I am being selfish or wrong. And if I can't figure it out, I move on.

But I thought that was interesting. I wanted to post that, just in case I lose my handy envelope.

You have to admit that any of the above options go a long way to resolving conflict.

Friday, March 01, 2013

Friday Freestyles.

My goodness.

TGIF!

GLORY!

AND it's PAYDAY!!

GLORY again!

And can you believe it is March already? 16% of the year is gone. Soon we will be hollering "Merry Christmas!" LOL

March means spring to me. I am wondering why it is so doggone cold outside. It's 40 degrees and the wind is whipping something awful. And if it's not cold, it's raining. I am waiting for the March Sun. That is all.

And this is the doom and gloom day... Sequestration starts today. I am a government employee, and we have gotten very vague emails.  But you know what? I refuse to worry about it. Congress ain't worried about. I won't worry about it either. I am going to be happy. Period. And have a good day. Humph.

I haven't been in the mood to post much this week. Why? Because I want to do a lot of Food for thought posts. I need to leave that alone right now. I've been a bit too busy this week, more than normal. So I need to save that for later.

Crafts and Cookies. Anyway, I wanted to post up some cards I made.


That one is for Southern Black Gal. She won the birthday sweepstakes. Too bad I spelled her name
 wrong. :(

Here's another for one of my favorite readers!


Thank goodness I spelled her name right.

I owed her a tin of cookies. So I made some chocolate chip pecan cookies for her.


That was fun. I made the cards one morning before work. For some reason, it was therapeutic. I was VERY calm when I arrived at work that day, even happy. I have to do that more often.

Spell Well. So, something interesting happened in one of my cubicle mate Cowgirl Cre's WWF game.

Yes. My cubicle mate, the Cowgirl Cre beat the great WWF wordsmith expert Tayari Jones in a game. This doesn't happen. We had to snap a picture of the score to prove it happened.

Ya'll just don't understand... Tayari can REALLY spell very well. It is a time of celebration when she gets beat. Cre had been sitting there in her cubicle, all wide-eyed, showing me the score in the final moves.

"Girl, if you beat her, I'll call her. I sure will. I will call right up. And we'll talk to her!"

So Cre beat her. I thought that chick was gonna turn cartwheels. And I dialed Tayari up. She didn't answer, but she called right back. She is on tour right now (I can't keep up with her. Sigh). Goodness, we talked to her. You would've thought we'd won the lotto or something.

Cre was so happy that she went out for lunch instead of eating the sandwich she made for lunch.

Yes. We are nerdy, I know. But Cre found out that she too could spell well! LOL.

Movie of the Week. Limitless staring Bradley Cooper and Robert deNiro.



This movie is the BOMB. It appeals to the Dr. LadyLee side of me. I wish I would've seen it at the movies instead of on my kindle. But it is always good to find something decent on Netflix!

I'm not going to review it. It's about a little pill that, when you take it, your mental capacity becomes limitless.

If I could invent a pill like that... wow!

Great movie. Had me on the edge of sofa! And that Bradley Cooper is gorgeous! I never knew what all the fuss over him was about, but I'm a fan now. Wow!

Check that out!

Song of the Week. I REALLY like this song. I know it has to be close to 30 years old, but I heard it for the first time last month.

You are my Sunshine by Mtume.



Man. I really like that song. Yeah, I know I'm 30 years late, but that's all right. Still a good song.

That's it for Friday Freestyles. I don't have much planned for the weekend. I'm sort of trying to take it easy, since I am having some back problems. I hope to get out on Saturday, though. Pam needs an oil change, a headlight and some new windshield wipers. (Ain't nothing worse than driving in pouring down rain and the wiper is half off. Sigh). That will be my adventure for the weekend. Otherwise, I'm going to try to relax and take it easy... on purpose.

You have a good weekend!