Quotable Quotes: Solo Navigation

Here's another great quote from one of the Origianl Oldgirls, the Infamous LoveBabz, from her post, Solo Navigation, concerning the ending of a relationship, and a return to singlehood.



"I do not feel alone in the world. I haven't felt alone in a long long time. My loveship is ending. Try as I might, there is no resuscitating something that is dead. Hanging on to the bitter end is bitter. We try to salvage love because we can recall when it was good; or when we were willing to let things fall by the wayside, because it (those little annoyances, quirks and personality flaws) were seemingly small and unimportant to the overall health of the loveship. Now those things are enormous and makes us crazy to no end.

I don't mind the solo navigation. I even like it a lot! The only feelings to consider in my decisions, are my own. Oh, I am not anti relationships, quite the contrary, I am more open to loveships more than ever. There is a great deal of value in connecting with someone, being committed to someone else and caring about their well-being. I want that fully in my life again. Its not enough to love someone. There has to be shared language, shared goals, shared forgiveness and shared joy. Nothing can thrive and grow under oppression, sadness and insecurity."




I like that word "loveship". It's so sophisticated and high class, lol.

Long quote... but a good one, chocked full of some things I've alway considered when love is ending.

I think I was telling my sister, and realizing my ownself, when looking back at relationships that were ending, that you're not necessarily mourning the end of the thing.

Afterall, you might be with a knucklehead, and it's time for him to go.

(Shoot... YOU might be the knucklehead in the relationship.)

We are not mourning the end of the relationship, but moreso, all that it encompassed, the emotional investment made, the time spent, and the loss of a time when things were good in the relationship. And I think once we realize we can't get any of that back, it might be easier to understand, let go, and accept moving on.

The final line of that quote contains 3 strong words: oppression, sadness, and insecurity.

No, nothing can grow, or even exist, in the midst of such.

Heck, I look at friendships that have ended, and one of those was in the mix. ESPECIALLY that insecurity part. Geez.

Strong quote from one of the Originals...

Really stuck with me and gave me something to think about.

Semi-Wordless Wednesdays: "Too Pretty to Eat"

Yesterday's lunch: salad made with baby green lettuces, spinach, broccoli, tomatoes, and strawberries.

It was almost too pretty to eat!

Enter the Dragon!

As part of transitioning to a more vegetarian lifestyle, I've made it a requirement for myself to try new fruits, vegetables and grains from time to time.

Some things work, resulting in me finding new and interesting foods.

Sometimes it doesn't. And all I can say is that I tried the item.

But the most unsual fruit I tried is one that I came across recently.

DRAGON FRUIT.

Other names for it: Pitaya and Strawberry Pear.

Look at it. Looks like an egg laid by a dragon.



Or if I'm really being honest, it looks like something a dragon coughed up or shot out its behind.

A bizarre fruit, it is. Even more strange is how it grows.



On a cactus. If I was a pioneer back in that day, and walked up on that odd looking stuff growing on a cactus, well, let's just say I would've kept on walking. Looks a bit, I don't know... poisonous.

It originated in the far east asian countries. It's also grown in Israel, Austrailia, and Hawaii.

The look of the flower doesn't do much for one wanting to eat of the fruit.



With that said, I saw the dragon fruit at my local farmer's market. I passed by it once, thought "What the heck is that?" and kept walking.

By the time I came back there were a few people gathered around it.

One guy said "You just gotta get one. You gotta."

He said what we were all thinking. So I grabbed one. I think it cost 2 bucks.

It sat in the fridge for a week. I half expected for to open the door of the fridge one morning and it would be there... pulsing and glowing. Or Ithought I'd open the fridge and see a baby dragon glaring at me.

(My imagination is way to vivid).

But it just sat there, on the top shelf... waiting.

I told Serenity23 about it, and she looked it up and relayed some info. (Why didn't I think of doing that?) So after what she said, I decided to give it a try.

I was NOT expecting to see what I saw once I cut it.



White flesh with black seeds. (There is a metaphor there somewhere, but I just don't think that deeply.)

Here's a pic I saw of it, all cut up all pretty.

Man, do not let me come to your house for a party and see some craziness like that on the table. I WILL TALK ABOUT YOU LATER ON. You might as well cut up an apple and serve it to guests.

Black speckled white wedges ate not a good look on a plate.

How does it taste? Tasted to me like a cross between a ripe overripe pear and a kiwi. As a matter of fact you would think that someone mixed kiwi seeds into a pear. I love pears. I like kiwi. But this was just alright.

You'll never hear me say, "Oh lawd! I'm craving some good dragon fruit."

I'm not a big fan of white fruits and veggies. I prefer colorful fruit and vegetables. This dragon fruit isn't all that spectacular on nutrients. Yes, it has the usual, like vitamins and minerals. Has a little protein. (note: anything that comes out the ground has protein). It has a little fiber. But nothing in huge amounts.

I probably won't put this on my grocery list. As a matter of fact, another trip to the farmer's market and there it was... at double the price it was in the past week. (I guess they assumed people's interest in this strange fruit was synonymous with a demand for it. Humph). So no, I wasn't paying 4 bucks for a piece of fruit which tasted just okay.

I'm glad I tried something new.

Still looking for new more interesting fruits and veggies to try!

A Most Useful Monday Morning

Monday!

*Doing BIG cartwheels*

The current temperature in the ATL is 65 degrees.

The current time is 7:00 AM

Oscar-Tyrone is laying here on the bed, staring at me, wanting to be rubbed. Throwing him in a headlock usually gets him out of my face. I'll leave him alone and just let him... stare.

I slept pretty good last night. Heck, I don't even remember going to bed. That's how I like it.

My weekend. I had a very nice weekend. It was very laid back.

On Friday night, I had my Women of Color Writer's Workshop. The usual crew wasn't there, and there was a little more erotica than I care for, but you know me, nothing really bothers me. I think for myself, I just want people to be themselves. Period. That's all I want.

I have a couple pieces for blog, so I'm happy about that.

Saturday, I didn't do much but the usual at home. I didn't even leave the house.

Sunday, I had a very good Financial Freedom Fighters meeting. Man, we haven't met since like, June or something, which is toooooo long. We spent a good couple of hours talking about where we are financially, any particular setbacks, and where we want to be for the rest of the year. We're doing another 21 day financial fast in early November, and I'm extremely happy about that. For me, doing it back in April helped so much, and set in stone a couple of habit changes that are still ongoing.

The funniest thing for me was that on Friday evening, my workshop leader Dawn and I talked until well after midnight about her financial goals, and she wanted my thoughts on it. I told her how I felt, made some suggestions, and went on home.

Well, at our Triple F Possee meeting, she talked of her goals and her discussion of such with her accountability partner about it all. And I'm sitting there thinking "Who is her accountability partner? That person is pretty good."

Turns out that it was me. I forgot we were assigned accountability partners back in January, and we were put together. LOL

You should've seen my surprise. You should've heard me hollering repeatedly "I DID SOMETHING USEFUL!"

LOL!

I suck as an accountability partner in any area. And it's one of those things where it's probably one of my idiosyncracies. I HATE bothering people, and if you expect me to fuss at you for not doing what you gotta do, forget about it. It's just not me. You will rarely find me doing any accountability centered group-like activities. I know in Finance group, you need to call me if you wanna talk. I ain't calling you, and I don't do anything where I need my accountability partner to swing in like superman and help. (I'm rather boring financially. I'm not running out to get that hot new purse, or that fabulous pair of heels).

So it was GREAT to be useful in that sense this weekend, without even knowing it.

As always with my activities, I enjoyed getting together with the ladies and the fellowship. (And in the case of my writing workshop, there's one guy in our midst, lol. I'm glad he's comfortable enough to join us, as he brings an interesting dynamic to our group). It is all such a reprieve from the worries of my day. And it's one of those things that goes in the "truly important" category of my life.

Now, what I really liked about this weekend was that there was not a lot of hard errand running. Most times, my weekends include such. Over the past year, I've been trying to spread that out over the week. Only because I want my weekend free for more rest and relaxation.

The only errand I ran was to my pharmacy last night. It's funny to me now that the pharmacists know's my name. And she was like you've been coming here for years. She's right. I hit them up once or twice a month on average.

I was looking at her thinking while chatting with her, I hope that ain't the case someday.

Anyway, last month, I went to pick up some meds and she was having a bad day, one of them "bust out crying" type of days that we as women have, and I had to encourage her.

She remembered our quick interaction last month, and I spent a few moments talking to her yesterday, telling her that I understood, because I had a HORRIBLE, most horribly depressing tear filled summer. I took a little time to explain to her that whatever we are facing is temporary, and we will be better for it, and we will be okay.

So I got my medicine, did a little grocery shopping (I am out of baby green salad, man!), and left.

I remember thinking to myself in the parking lot "I DID SOMETHING USEFUL!"

That made me happy.

This was a trying weekend. Sensationalistic, even. Big scurry of our feet towards scandal. Our fingers pointing, laughing, joking. Our nosiness was at an all time high.

I know, in speaking face-to-face to a New Birth member this weekend, that from me, there was no jeering, pointing and laughing, no bashing, no hate for their pastor...

Only concern for my friend's feelings, and my undying support of my friend. I need for that friend's faith in God to stay strong, so that friend can continue to be a powerful influence in the life of myself and others.

And they had to hear me holler CLEARLY that I am NOT a member of their church, that is not my pastor, and all of that is between them.

I'm just one more nosy joker, with an opinion about something that has nothing to do with me. That is all.

But I was so happy in the midst of it all, I did good things this weekend.

I WAS USEFUL.

And I ask you, in the midst of it all, were you useful in someone's life? You help or encourage someone this weekend? Did you sow into someone's heart and spirit this weekend?

If not... well, check your priorities, alright?

That's all I'm saying. Check your priorities.

Carry that thought into the week.

Heck, 75% of the year is over.

Carry that thought into the remainder of the year.

I know I will.

I learned after this past week, I know that it is truly essential.

There are people out there who you will cross paths with and you're one of the pieces of the their life's puzzle.

Ponder that. Concentrate on that.

Believe That.

With that said, you have a great week. On purpose.

Friday Freestyles

TGIF!!

Man, I tell you, my weekdays are going by superfast.

I think it's because I'm doing much busy work at work. So by the time I look up, it's time to go home.

And I ain't nowhere near mad about that, mayne.

My week. I don't quite remember Monday or Tuesday. I went to work, and managed to stay out of trouble, and these days, that's what's important.

Now, I know on Tuesday night I arrived home and I noticed that my brake lights didn't go off. And those lamps were getting REALLY hot. The only way I could turn them off was to disconnect my battery. Then there was the decision of having to take at least half a day off and go get everything taken care of. I would've loved to just take half a day off and go in to work that afternoon, but management is silly, and God forbid I walk in the building at 1 or 2 in the afternoon and the wrong person sees me. I didn't want to have to deal with any allusions of stealing time, so I just took the day off, drove waaay out to the southside, got it fixed and purchased 2 new tires and an alignment. (The tires and alignment took 3 hours. Pep boys is slow to death. GEEZ! I was just mentally exhausted after that.)

I put less than 5000 miles a year on my car, so when something goes bad, I get EVERYTHING taken care of at one time! So I was happy for that.

Afterwards, I came home and took a 3 hour nap. Talk about some gooooood sleep! WOW.

I have been sleeping hella good lately. Yay me!

Tonight I have another Women of Color Writing Workshop. Hopefully, I will generate some good material for my blog. I absolutely love the writing prompts, and they stir me up to work on my regular writing material. So I'm excited about that.

My group leader Dawn wants me to make this cake for the meeting.

Uh, no. I have no chocolate, no coffee, no sour cream, no white sugar, no NOTHING for this coffee infused double chocolate cake.

Dawn loves this cake. She's always hollering about how it's better than sex. *crickets*

Oh it is sooooo good. I don't think I've made one in 2 or 3 years. Very simple, and everything is from scratch. But I don't have the ingredients. I may make it next time. We will see. For this meeting, I think I will pick up a quick pizza.

For all I care, we can have bread and water. I'm just looking forward to good writing and good fellowship. That means so much to me. So much to us all.

Quote of the Week: Good one, a facebook status:

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I — not events — have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.— Groucho Marx


That's very good. I need to read that one forward and backwards, and translate it into French and Spanish. I need to put that one in my smile box, i.e., my box of quotes.

Choose to be happy in spite of all things. I needed that. It's up to me to rein in my frustrations and... be happy.

Current Events. The most important current event going on in the ATL right now are issues with a pastor of the sister church to my own megachurch. Folks really want to know my opinion on the matter. It's interesting, because you can throw people into two categories: those who scoff behind the questions, and those who genuinely want to talk about these things, as it is causing them to examine themselves and their thoughts on spirituality. And I was telling a good friend yesterday, that when these things happen, it's a good way to "locate" people. If someone gives me problems over my spiritual choices, then I automatically know that they have thought bad of me all along, and aren't worthy of much thought from me in the first place.

The older I get, the more I'm like this: You either wrecking my steelo and throwing me off course, or you helping me grow stronger in someway. Period. No we don't have to agree on our choices, but let's be supportive and helpful to each other instead of taring each other down. This is what I yearn for in my life, and I hope to be in the lives of others.

This is my thing, as with most sensational things I see on TV. Do I even have a right to stand as judge and jury over anyone other than myself and those I'm responsible for?

No.

But I realize that we in this day and age are groomed to do so. I'm daily training myself not to. Man, I think so much about what leads up to things, and examining my own life in light of it, and praying about any changes I need to make within my ownself, that I really don't have the time or patience to scoff and trip.

Far as I'm concerned, what's going on is between Bishop and his congregation. My own pastor stays in trouble. This is nothing new, as far as I'm concerned. I got a problem with a pastor who can't handle persecution. Big problem.

On my mind this day is my friends who attend New Birth, presently and in the past. They are GREAT people, people who don't worship a man, but are simply looking to grow spiritually. When I think of them, I think of wonderful people, who have grown in their lives under the pastoral care of their Bishop. Those friends have greatly impacted my own life and my spiritual walk, and I am immensely thankful for them. Know that I'm praying for you, and thinking of you. Keep your head held high, and hold on to your faith, and continue to grow. No, I haven't call any of you, because I know you're being inundated with calls, and you know me, I dont' like to bother people. But you got my number and email if you need to talk. I am here and thinking of you.

That's how I truly feel in my heart about it all. My bit of something positive in the sea of negativity.

Song of the Week. One of my favorites, from a most excellent CD by Tonex, and probably one of the most personally honest gospel CDs I've every heard. I love this song, as it speaks to the heart of me, and questions I've asked of myself on occasion, the whole question of why I do the things I do.

That's such a poignant song, and I love the jazz influences and the overall feeling of it. Follow that up with a good praise song, and I'm good!

Today, we make the choice to be happy.

And with that said, I hope you have a great weekend... on purpose.