Rest in Peace Octavia Butler... 1947-2006

I checked Tayari Jones' blog yesterday afternoon, and saw the following:

R.I.P. Octavia Butler

All I could do is stare, because it did not compute...

Octavia Butler had died.

That couldn't be right. It couldn't be true.

And there I was, holding her latest book, Fledgling, in my hands. I'd made it to the halfway point, hoping that I could look up her tour schedule so that I could get her to sign it...

Afterall, she was one of the greatest African American Science Fiction writers of all time.

At first, I thought it was a hoax, because there was nothing about it on the AP wire... But then, I saw Stephen Barnes site, and Ed Champion's site... They both called the coroner's office and reporters, etc,. and got it confirmed.

I, personally, am devastated, because she is one of my favorite writers...And I just happen to be reading her latest book, her first in seven years, when I read that she had died.

I just don't believe it...

It clearly remember when I first learned of her...

One of my best friends, a white dude name Tim, is an avid science fiction reader. I being a big time black lit reader, have always picked on him about reading some black lit, instead of all that science fiction B.S.

"Dude, you need to read some black lit!"
"Um... I don't think so," he said with a frown.
"All this science fiction crap, you need to leave that alone."
"Uh, no."

I've thought that it was strange that he wouldn't read black lit. Especially since he is married to a black woman. I thought he would like a good black lit book... But dude loves science fiction. It's either science fiction or nothing at all with him.

"Well I ain't reading it. My people don't write stuff like that."
He cocked his head at me. "Ooooooh, yes you do!!!"
"Yeah right."

Tim proceeded to go to his bookshelf and pull a couple of paperbacks off the shelf.

"Here's one of my favorite authors: Octavia Butler! She's really good! I like her a lot!!"
He flashed the book proudly in my face.
"Man, go head on with that!, I yelled, blowing him off with a wave of my hand. " I ain't reading no damn science fiction."

Well, fast forward about 6 months later. I picked up an anthology entitled Dark Matter: A Century of Speculative Fiction from the African Diaspora edited by Sheree R. Thomas. I am a big fan of anthologies. If I read a story I like, I will usually go buy everything by that author.

Well, Octavia Butler had a short story entitled "The Evening and the Morning and the Night" in this anthology collection. It was a story surrounding a cure for cancer that had an interesting side affect: it created a disease that caused one to self-mutilate oneself and kill others...

It knocked my socks off. It was the most interesting, weirdest, and creative short story I have ever read...

It was exceptional.

And I had to have more...

I called up my boy Tim, and told him about it. He said, "See, I told you!!"

The next time I went to his house, I watched him pull every book he owned by Octavia Butler off of his bookshelves. He explained each series of her books to me, and let me decide what I wanted to read. I chose to read the three books of the Xenogenesis Series: Dawn, Adulthood Rites, and Imago. All three of these books have been recently combined into one book entitled Lilith's Brood.

The Xenogenesis series has to be by far the most creative piece of fiction I have ever read. It details the interactions and cross breeding of the Oankali, a three gender alien race, with humans living in a post nuclear holocaust war earth... The main character is a young black woman name Lilith Iyapo, and we read about her and the offspring struggles in dealing with this particular arrangement with these aliens and life on earth...

Yikes...That's the best way I can explain it... And it was, um... quite creative, to say the least. It blew my damn mind.

I next read the Patternist Series: Patternmaster, Mind of my Mind, and Wildseed. Two other books, which I haven't read are in this series: Clay's Ark and Survivor. These books surround the creation of a society of networked telepaths and the Immortal who has created them, etc. A couple of these books, Mind of my Mind, and Wildseed, had strong black female characters, and strong social issues... Again, they were highly creative, exceptional books!

Finally, I read the Parable Series: Parable of the Sower and Parable of the Talents. Now, these were my favorites amongst her novels. I even did a post on Parable of the Sower last year, as it was eerily (in my mind) similar to what was going on during the Hurricaine Katrina disaster.

I also read one of her most popular books, Kindred, a novel which is usually found in the black lit section in bookstores. It is the story of a modern black woman who keeps falling back in time to rescue her slave owning ancestor. This book has also been used as required reading for literature classes...


And right now, I am reading Fledgling, a story about an amnesiac black female vampire, and her quest to find out who she is, and who has destroyed her family....

It too is amazing...

And I am so sad that we have lost one of the most powerful and creative African American writers of our generation...

If you've never read anything by her, do yourself a favor and go check it out... You too will be truly amazed... and enlightened.

Ladylee's Four Things Tag!!!

What in the world?????

I've been tagged!!!!

Tayari Jones, my faaaaavvvooooriiittte author, tagged me…

Humph…

Tayari, you should have sent the first 100 pages of your manuscript for the next book along with this tag…

I would’ve been much obliged! Really, that would have made me REALLLY happy!!!!

However, I will try my hand at this…


FOUR JOBS I'VE HAD:


Termite Chemist: A research chemist postdoctoral position I held in New Orleans. Oh how glorious it was to smash up those evil little termites and the woods they hate/love and extract them… Took awhile to get use to bugs, but hey, it was a nice paycheck!!!

I never saw an actual termite queen (pictured above). All I know, if I'm remember correctly, is that she could live up to thirty years, and laid 2000 eggs a day... Geez, I remember thinking, Old girl know she was doing some serious twerking! (LOL)

Carpet finishing Chemist: A co-op position I had with Amoco when I was an 19-year-old junior in college. A $524.00 paycheck every two weeks, back in 1988: YOU COULD NOT TELL ME I WASN’T RICH, RICH, RIIIIICCCH!! I would be living under a freakin' bridge if I had to live off that now!! (This is the job where I learned the following rule: Do not wear your good clothes to work! Labcoats don’t stop everything…)

Pesticides Chemist: My current job… **Crickets** Y-A-W-N! The only thing keeping me awake is watching out for management’s love of messing with me, trying their best to stick a foot up my ass. But oh, what a glorious paycheck… Keeps the bills paid! GLORY!

POSTAL WORKER: back when I was 17, I had what was called a casual employee position. Now THAT’s when I understood the whole “Why” behind postal workers snapping and shooting up the place. Drama plus monotony spells trouble!!


FOUR MOVIES I’VE WATCHED OVER AND OVER:

First and Foremost:

The Color Purple… Now you know every black person in America over the age of thirty knows this movie word for word! Favorite lines: "You told Harpo ta beat me!" "Dear God..." , "I'se married now!" and "Don't you mess with that mailbox".




Coal Miner’s Daughter: This is one of my all time favorites. I first saw it when I was 8 years old at the Roosevelt Highway drive-in movies in College Park… I’ve been hooked every since!! I sit down and watch it everytime it comes on, and it is another movie that I know word for word!





What’s Love Got to do with it: I was just looking at this yesterday at work… Me and Cowgirl Cre know those dance routines back and forth! Angela Bassett should have gotten the Oscar for that role. She was cheated!



Set it Off: Got caught watching this at work a couple of weeks ago… Management walked up on me, but I was sitting there working on some boring paperwork… But I have decided to just, um… not watch it at work… Makes me feel, uh, I don’t know, violent… and I don’t want to lose my good gubment job!! Me and Lady Tee wanted to rob a bank after seeing this! It was that getting shot and killed part that stopped us cold! LOL!


FOUR PLACES I’VE LIVED: I’m a true ATLien at heart. I’ve lived all over Atlanta!

Eastside!: Decatur and Lithonia

Westside!: Smyrna (in Cobb County, near Marietta)

Southside!: COLLEGE PARK: what, you didn’t know??

Could never afford the Northside!!

New Orleans :( I lived in a boarding house in Kenner near the airport for 5 weeks and I lived in New Orleans East the remainder of my time there. I lived there for 2 years and 9 months of my life… This was one of the WORST chapters of my life!!! ~sigh~. When I left in 2001, it was like Moses and them leaving Egypt for the promised land! It hurt my heart to see that doggone hurricaine hit the place, though.

FOUR TV SHOWS I LOVE: I like any show dealing with a straight up crime being commited and/or any analysis of a person’s or crime’s backstory (I like to know “why” you are crazy and “why” some craziness jumped off!)


Law and Order: I love that “Duum-Duum” sound. It makes me all giddy! I also like it when the announcer says "In the criminal justice system..." But you better catch it from the start, or you'll be lost as all get out!

Cold Case: I love those flashbacks! And there is always a twist to the murder mystery!


City Confidential: A nice show on the A&E channel, where a city is profiled (it’s origin, etc.) and then a murder that occurred there is heavily detailed from start to finish… oh, I just LOVE that!

Dateline: Yeah, it comes on 100 times a week, but I still love it…


One more: IRON CHEF on Food Network… A Japenese show… The host thinks he's the best thing since water and dirt.... He's such a freakin' diva... Something kind of bizarre, though, yet exciting about 2 gourmet chefs competing to see who can make the best dishes from the “theme ingredient” in an hour (Last night was a cheese battle)… I wish they would have some black folks on there!! I would love to see a Soul food battle!


FOUR PLACES I’VE VACATIONED:

I haven’t vacationed as an adult. Yeah, I’ve been to a slew of conferences, and I have had a tendency to get out and explore while I am at those conferences, but as far as just going somewhere to chill on my own dime and time? Nope. (Reminder to self: I GOTTA take a vacation!)

So with that said, as a child:

I’ve been to Disney World twice.

Jacksonville Florida and Pensacola Florida… for some reason, my Mama liked these places… Close to GA and cheap… she liked that!

FOUR OF MY FAVORITE DISHES:



Gumbo: I picked up this bad habit in New Orleans. I like it chock FULL of sausage, chicken, snow crabs (I couldn’t get down with the blue crabs) and shrimp!! Oh yeah, it’s especially good if it is hot and spicy!!!

Fried Chicken: I am a southern girl! Yeah, I only eat it once every 2 weeks on the average, but I gotta have it on my list!

Key Lime Pie: So good… I’ve found a couple of markets that make it just the way I like it! And I haven’t had any allll year… Imagine that!

Last but not least: Anything Stir fried…. For some reason, I get a kick out of chopping up fresh veggies and sitr-frying them in hot olive oil with all kinds of Thai seasonings and Hot peppers!
Make a pot of rosemary and parsley jasmine rice or a pot of rice noodles and it's ON!!

FOUR SITES I VISIT DAILY:

First and Foremost: Serenity23… I LOVE Serenity’s site, man!! I lovingly call it Serenity23's Sundown Gospel...Some folks need their morning cup of coffee… I NEEDS Serenity’s wisdom at the beginning of the day or I’m shaking like a crackhead!! I’ve even talked to the Almighty Serenity once on the phone (I was so nervous)… And we email and IM a lot, and that’s a good thang!!

Tayari Jones’ blog: My most favorite author on the planet! She has a REAL blog, not this free blogger craziness. I bet she paid for hers! (LOL) It’s more of a literary blog, but she will trip out and rant every once in a blue moon. (This is when we see the ATLien in her, you see.). I read it religiously. I get good writing advice there, and I can keep up with her every move! LOL!

Sharon (Just Write Now)… Sharon is like a nurse or something... I hit Sharon up when I need my fully loaded epidermic shot of self-love, self-esteem, joy, rationale, hoo-rah, encouragement, heart, love for family… all things positive, doggonit… She doesn’t post much, but when I am feeling down, I go read a couple of her posts, and just pretend it's fresh and new. (Plus I see something new everytime I read them!) Her posts are like the best and most expensive cuts of meat- they give me that “itis”. I have to go and digest them before I even think to tip-toe over to her comment section and post a comment… But, I would be very happy if she could post more… *hint, hint*

DJ Diva (DJ Clean Spirit)…she’s been a bit missing in action lately, but I love her rants and raves… Our love for all things musical is what drew me to her blog in the first place. She knows her politics too… I even got a chance to talk to her on the phone (*Ladylee letting out a screech* I was a bit nervous talking to her too!). She peeped some serious knowledge that night. And I am loving her transformation into the fabulous DJ Clean Spirit!! You go, girl…

And Oh yeah… SBS in full, Full Effect… (P(L), N, and SC- I am down for ya'll...) Really though… Don’t think I forgot about ya!!

Honorable Mentions: er' body on my Blogroll (and oh yeah, Brandon Massey, Prince of Black horror fiction, glad to hear from you and see that your blog is back!!)

FOUR UNDERRATED TOPICS: couldn’t think of anything while I was working on this, so I asked my neighbor Hen-Dog, who came over to rip some CDs on my laptop, to chime in on this… He quickly rattled off the following topics...So this is from “Mr. Black Empowerment” himself…

Voting issues
Blacks in politics
Black businesses
Black Empowerment

Alright… yeah!!

**Ladylee pumping fist in the air**

*Ladylee walking away quickly and moving on to the next topic*


FOUR OVERRATED TOPICS: Alright, I got this one…

Stars and their love lives: I could care less what Brad and Angelina are doing! And why am I suppose to be all up in Denzel’s business… Gee, I hate shows like Entertainment tonight which feed on these folks personal business!! I think I would pay more attention if one of those stars would be so kind as to drop some bread on my mortgage or something!


Hip-Hop: Hip hop is terrible right now… I don't listen to regular radio... I am an classic oldies fan. Could someone please fade this thing to black and transport me back to the days of Run D.M.C., Whodini, The Fat Boys, Old LL Cool J, the Beastie Boys, MC Lyte, Roxanne Shante, old Queen Latifah, UTFO, old Dougie Fresh and the get Fresh crew???? Oh God, it hurts too bad to think about it!!!

*Ladylee shedding a tear*

Natalee Holloway: I wrote a post entitled 100 days… Still Missing, that got linked on some weird Muslim site, giving me upwards of 200 hits a day (whoa!). They were a bunch of lurkers though... Only a couple of comments... I talked a bit about twerking, and that is not an everyday term (so I know people of a different ethnicity were a bit, um, confused). That post was a mini rant about friendship and how her homegirls watched her go get her drunk behind in a car in the middle of the night with three dudes... (Is that a train whistle I hear in the distance? Humph!)

Yo, no disrespect, but she’s been gone since last May and I am still seeing stories on her. Personally, I think her parents should run up on those boys in Aruba and do what Celie said in The Color Purple: "Sit around and whop their asses"… because they probably got away with murder, you know. Those boys must be going crazy inside...Me personally, I wouldn't want such a thang on my conscience...

American Idol… Frankly, I am tired of this show… I don’t get interested until they get down to the final 5 or 6 people who can actually hold a tune… I think I would be more happy if they reran some of Fantasia, Ruben, and Kelly’s best performances… Go figure...

Four Bloggers that I'm TAGGING: don't worry, just make a list... you don't have to get all detailed like me... Ya'll know I'm long winded!!!

1. Serenity23

2. Superstar Dr. Nic ("N" search of that ecstasy!)

3. Sharon (Just Write Now!)

4. Khalli 88, the Sneaker King!

Alright, that's all folks... hope you got a little out of the tiny, tiny glimpse I just gave of me, the Infamous Ladylee :)

**Happy Birthday, Sharon... "Ms. Just Write Now" !!!**

Happy Birthday, Sharon!!!!

Blogger and Friend Sharon, Ms. Write Now, turns 41 today! (That's her in the picture to the left with her son Ryan!)

I know she don't mind me telling her age... You see, Sharon's just not that type of person...

She is ageless...

And I LOVE her blog...

She is all about her family. She LOVES her family! She is one of 69 grandchildren...

(Now Sharon, you've got some family, hon! Was the old theme to Soul Train playing when you and the crew posed for this picture?)

But Sharon holds a special place in my heart... She has to be one of the most inquistive and brightest people I've EVER met...

I met Sharon in August of last year at the National Book Club conference in Atlanta... I think we were both in Tayari Jones' session... She asked poignant questions, while I sat there in awe, not saying a doggone word, just happy to see my favorite author speak... (I was half a second from passing out! LOL!)...

I didn't meet Sharon then... I just remember thinking "Dang, somebody just asked an important ass question! I gotta jot that down!"

But I didn't actually meet Sharon until Anita Digg's novel writing workshop... She sat in an empty seat next to me. We were both clutching our papers, feverishly taking notes...

And again, she asked important, probing questions...

... while I, Ladylee, sat there completely dumbfounded and stupefied, trying to soak up the tons of information we were receiving...

When the workshop was almost over, I remember Sharon mumbling something to the effect of "I need to take a class".

She'd asked a couple of questions concerning description... I tapped her on her shoulder and asked her for her email address because I'd found a couple of good books on the subject of description that really helped my writing...

I emailed her the references, and we have kept in touch via email (and now blog) every since then...

Sharon has to be the most positive person I've ever met in my life... So positive, so confident, so outgoing, so gung ho, with that high self esteem and self-love thang going on...

Geez, girl, I want to be like you when I grow up!!!

And when she leaves a comment on your blog, especially on serious or thought-provoking posts...

She drops knowledge like nuclear bombs...

But, um... I think I've gotten Sharon's whole comment process figured out...

Here's what I think actually happens when she is contemplating making a comment...

fade to black, fuzzy lines... THE SCENE

*Sharon sitting at the computer, thoughtfully reading a post she finds intriguing...*

"Hmm..," she breathes. "That was a good post. I think I shall leave a comment."

She thinks for a moment, and takes a sip of wine from her wine glass.

She reaches for the keyboard, prepared to type away, but instead decides to grab the large hand held microphone sitting next to the computer. She stands up, and a spotlight automatically highlights her...

She's all of a sudden on a stage, and a crowd of thousands has automatically gathered, because they know she is about to say something utterly PROFOUND. A hush falls over the immense crowd... It is so quiet, you can hear a pin drop...

It's almost like one of those old E.F. Hutton commercials...

Why, even the *Crickets* are quiet, wide-eyed and poised, longing to hear what pearls of wisdom Sharon will undoubtedly convey to the awaiting crowd...

Then she speaks...

(note: I've taken part of one of her random comments from another blog, in response to a topic surrounding envy, competition with others, and comparing and contrasting oneself with others...)

"The confidence in ourselves that can only truly come with age and experiences, allows us to move away from the tendency to do the compare and contrast exercise. This self-awareness regardless of what it is based in be it religious belief, spiritual beliefs, or some other system of faith, enables us to live, thrive, and flourish in our own skin. Once we gain this ability, we realize that comparisons to others have no validity in our world as the choices each of us makes for ourselves dictate what we have, achieve, and become."

The crowd is in awe... bathed in silence...

It is almost as if they are left without air...

Sharon doesn't wait for them to fully comprehend the ground breaking magnitude of what she has just said...

She just smashes the microphone to the floor, raises her hands high, bows before the crowd, and exits stage left...

fuzzy wavy lines... fade back to the present...

All I know, when Sharon leaves a comment, she leaves a damn COMMENT! Her words are like dynamite: when she speaks them, things are changed and rearranged... She has presented "the answer" to whatever the issue is at hand. It would take me weeks to come up with some of the comments she comes up with in a matter of seconds...She's left some comments on my blog that have... left me breathless. And changed my whole outlook on whatever issue I was facing...

After seeing the same deep comments over and over again, and after the comment above on someone else's blog... I immediately granted her her own "Original Oldgirl" platinum card, good worldwide, with absolutely no monetary limits...

So Sharon, if the cops ever threaten to arrest you, or a gang of folks try to jump you, you have the right to say...

Step BACK... I am an "Original Oldgirl"! Don't touch me! I am an "OG"!

No, it may not help you...

You'd still get locked down and the brakes beaten off ya, you know...

But you will have the PRIDE attached to being an "Original OG"...

LOL!

So this here post is dedicated to you, Oldgirl! And the video that's playing reminds me of you whenever I hear it!!

Keep living your life like it's Golden! And keep dropping knowledge, girl, because we really need it!

Have a Happy, happy Birthday!!! :)

from LadyLee...

the Original "OG"

My Favorite Author, Tayari Jones, Comes to Town :)

This weekend, I had a rare chance to see two of my favorite writers, Tayari Jones and Pearl Cleage. They had a conversation, Q&A event, and book signing as part of the Sisterspeak and More program at Spelman College this February.

What an event! I took quite a few pictures… Note: I am a member of the BADDEST book club in the ATL, Circle of Friends II… Below are a couple of pictures of both authors with my infamous and fabulous book club president, Shunda Leigh…


Now I love Pearl Cleage… She is a professor at Spelman.. But she wears many hats: playwright, essayist, novelist, feminist… She was commissioned by Oprah Winfrey to pen a poem, "We Speak Your Names", for the Legend’s ball last year… She is a wonderful writer, and she is one of the few writers whose books I will buy in hardcover, the first week they hit the bookstores…

She has a new book coming out on February 28th, Baby Brother's Blues, and I plan to buy it AND read it by the end of next week… Shunda had an advance copy... It took everything in me not to SNATCH IT when she sat it down for a moment!


But many of you may not have heard of my favorite author Tayari Jones… She is a Spelman College graduate and a English professor at the University of Illinois at Urbana. I hadn’t heard of her either until I read the short story “Press and Curl” in the African American Short Story Anthology Gumbo: A Celebration of African American Writing. “Press and Curl” is a short story about a young girl getting her hair straightened, in preparation for a funeral….



Now all the sistas out there…

you KNOW you remember getting your hair straightened…
…the smoke coming off that HOT ass straightening comb (which, by the way, was heated up in a hot metal chamber--scratch that, my Mama was bootleg-- she heated the hot comb up on one of the eyes on the stove) , the pressing oil, the hair grease (we used the green Afro Sheen... Ultra Sheen Cosmetics), all the sounds of that hot comb sliding slowly through your hair, sizzle, sizzle, etc… I even have a hot comb burn on my shoulder to this very day!

Don’t act like you don’t know!! Ya’ll remember that ish!!

And if you don’t know already from reading my blog…

~***I LOVE ALL THINGS NOSTALGIC!***~

Really though…

And sitting down in the kitchen getting your nappy be-be shot hair straightened is about as NOSTALGIC as it gets…

There was an ART to that thing! You were something special if you could straighten a girl's hair without damn near burning off a ear or scorching a neck or forehead...

Um, yeah... "Press and Curl" brought back some serious memories for me! I mean, have you seen anyone even THINK to write about that subject? Something that just about every little black girl experienced as a child??

After I read that story (three times), I wondered, “Who in the hell is Tayari Jones and what ELSE has she written that I can get my hands on RIGHT NOW!!?”

So I looked her name up on Amazon.com, and saw that she had written a novel…

I went to the bookstore and bought it that very day…

I read that novel, her first novel, the highly acclaimed Leaving Atlanta in two days. Leaving Atlanta is a historical fiction story that has the Atlanta Missing and Murdered Children cases of the late seventies/early eighties as a backdrop… It is a fictional novel about 3 children that were growing up during that time. It was the first piece of historical fiction that I’d ever read… Heck, I didn’t know what historical fiction was until I read this book.

It made me cry.

I was a sixth grader in the ATL during the time of the Atlanta Child Murders Era, and she captured the way my friends and I felt during that time perfectly… all the angst, all the fear, the uncertainty… I remember the worse thing you could say to someone back then was “That’s why ‘the Man’ is gonna get you!!” Saying that was MUCH worse than cussing somebody out… She captured that perfectly and then some…

Her second novel, The Untelling, is about a young woman living in the ATL who has to “untell” a lie, and at the same time, come to grips with things that have happened in her past family life… (This is NOT a good synopsis of the novel. This novel was so deep, deep off the doggone pages, with so many layers, and I can’t summarize it in one sentence. Hell, this post would be 10 pages long if I tried to summarize it.) The Untelling touched me just as much as Leaving Atlanta did…

The Untelling was awesome, yet spooky… Some of the hoods I have lived in were richly detailed in that book. (I grew up in SWATS, MLK corridor, Ben Hill, and Adamsville before moving to College Park). All of the things I go through currently with the crackheads in my ‘hood are detailed in that book… I almost wondered if Tayari Jones did some undercover work in my hood… I asked a question during the Q&A session about her research in the area of gentrification, because it was so real… she mentioned that she had been interested in such real estate issues…

(Come on Tayari, you can tell me… you spent a little time in the hood as an undercover crackhead! The sequences you had in the book were a little too, um... REALISTIC!!)

(And look at your braids, Tayari... They are FIERCE! You are a true ATLien...I bet the same girl that braids all the ATLien rappers hair braids yours...)

LOL!

These were the first books that I’d ever read where the city of Atlanta was not only a backdrop for a story, but was actually a living and breathing character in the story…

Dang, I wish I could write like that!!!...

**Ladylee setting fire to the Ph.D. dissertation and several scientific publications and ferociously spiking them out of the Mazda into the middle of Peachtree street traffic**

LOL!

Now this sister is the main reason I want to write… I might even take a class...I had NEVER read books like hers before. I’d never read LITERARY books (note: LITERARY, not that urban drama commercial fluff B.S.) about my city, about things so similar to what I’d gone through growing up in the ATL… books with SO many layers… so much symbolism, great use of metaphor, simile, description…books that I am thinking about for days after I read them.

I will always follow her career… She’s already winning book prizes…I see a Pulitzer on the horizons…

Oh yeah, Tayari, you’re friendly now…

She put out an APB for me (Where is Ladylee?) on her blog a couple of weeks ago because I was missing in action… I couldn't figure out the new comment procedures. (Simple things like that leave me stupefied). It took several emails to prod me to figure out what the heck to do....(Now THAT was hilarious... scary but hilarious!)

And posing your books so that you could casually show off your shoes... That was quite original and oh so wonderfully ghettofabulous!!! I bet NO author has EVER thought of that! (Hey Shoe Queen Blogger Serenity 23, I think you should do that when YOUR book comes out, girl!)

And Tayari has given me some of the best writing advice ever… She sent an email one day after I posted a comment on her blog the first time, about how I was not an aspiring writer, but how I am a writer because of what's in my heart... So, um... I walk around the job with my nose in the air...

Step BACK! I am a writer... GET THE F*** BACK! (LOL!)

I expected someone to pass around an offering plate after Saturday’s Q&A after all the knowledge she dropped… I needed a tape recorder or something... I AM SO INSPIRED!

…but, um... when you make Oprah’s book club, homegirl, or win the Pulitzer, etc…

Don’t ACT like you don’t know me… I’m not all that quiet…Don’t have me out in the audience getting “negroidal” and embarrassing you… Don't let the ATLien come out of me!!

LOL!!

But seriously, if you haven’t read anything by Tayari Jones, do yourself a favor and cop one of her books… She has a couple of short pieces over on her blog that left me speechless and clutching my imaginary pearls (Have You Known Me Lately? and Some Thing Blue).

Look here, um Tayari...

Those two stories were a bit, I don't know... FULLY loaded with possibilities. Tayari, I'm going to need for you to stretch those two stories out into epic novels, and go ahead and put those out as soon as possible, if you don't mind... I need to know what happens to those main characters...

Just a request :)

Do yourself a favor and check out my favorite author!

Trust me... It won’t be too long before you wish you had!!

My Beloved Neighbors, Part I... the House on the Left

My home is located in beautiful downtown Atlanta...

And if you know anything about some of the intown Atlanta communities, you'd know that there is a large homosexual population.

Why, my workplace is located on an infamous male hustler strip... It's something else seeing young guys hanging out on the corners at all times of the day...

But we won't get into that...

My neighbohhood is largely homosexual... As a matter of fact, my neighbors who live in the houses on either side of me are homosexual... This doesn't bother me, but I know it completely unnerves people who are not from around these parts...

House on the left:

Hmmm... Gay black frat guys. (I won't say which fraternity, but I pose a question...Is it just me or does a certain black greek fraternity have a lot of black gay men??)

I haven't had much interaction with these fellas.

But when I first moved in, one of the guys ran over to introduce himself.

"Hi, I'm T!"

I shook his hand. Damn, his hand was softer than my hands would ever be! "I'm Ladylee, and this is my sister Kay."

Kay was standing there looking stoned-faced and crazy because only the night before, she'd been completely traumatized by one of the dudes taking a nice shower. And, umm... they have no curtains on the window in the shower. This didn't traumatize me, because my neighbor the Infamous Hen-Dog warned me that they had no curtains in the bathroom. Hen even went so far as to do incredible reenactments of those showers for me, so I was thoroughly prepared for what I saw... Kay, however, was not.

T smiled broadly.

Oh God, his skin is SOOOO beautiful, I thought to myself.

"Ladylee, if you need anything or any help, let us know, okay? And we like to party, so if we get loud, just let us know, okay?"

Yeah right, I thought quietly to myself. Like I'm gonna bring my behind out here in the middle of the night, knock on ya'll's door, and ask you all to quiet down...

I think he saw the frown on my face, because he looked at me questionably.

"Look here, Shorty," I said. "I could care less about your parties. Just don't get rowdy and come over into my yard fighting and carrying on. And don't knock on my door screaming 'help me' either, alright?"

The broad smile on his face slowly melted away.

Yeah, I needed for them to think that I, Ladylee, was a nutcase...

Plus, the lesbian couple, Kim and her wifey, who lived down the street had already hipped me to their parties and they were pissed that they weren't allowed at those parties. "Yeah, f*** them niggas!" Kim barked when I asked her about the homeboys I would be living next door to.
She sipped her beer from her elegant wine glass (as usual), and stared up the street towards their house. "They wouldn't let us come to their party! We all gay! We trying to have some solidarity and s***, and they discriminating, talking about 'Men only'!"

*Crickets*

I was looking at Kim like a deer in the headlights that day!!

Interesting. Those guys haven't said much to me since I've moved in. My sister, who's bedroom is closest to their house, complains about them at times. I could care less since my bedroom is on the main floor on the other side of the house...

"Lee! Guuurrrl, they was out fightin' last night or something!"

"Lee, they were all out there on the front porch of their house stepping or something. And they were hitting some canes or sticks or something against the porch!"

"Lee," she screamed one morning, "gurrrlll, they were out there fighting like some doggone women. I didn't know what to do."

And when Kay's boyfriend came over and for some dumb reason had been standing out in the front yard a bit too long with Kay, and angry Kay later screamed, "Lee, they all ran out the house trying to check out Ken!!!"

To which I responded, "Look Kay, I told your man several times when he comes over or leaves my house, he needs to get his ass in the house or get on in his car, because I WILL not be helping you rescue him from any trouble." Ken thought I was joking, but shoot, just try me, baby...

"Look here, Kay," I also said on one too many occasions. "I told T what the deal was when we first moved in. Don't worry about it... They can do the thizzle, live and let live, as long as they stay out of my yard, and don't be knocking on my door!!"

And let's not even talk about around last Christmas, when my brother had just left my house late one night, and had called back during his drive home.

"Lee... Shawty, there are 2 dudes in a white car in front of your house, just sitting there! I don't know if they are watching your house or what. Just want you to know, Shawty."

"What, boy? All this mortgage I'm paying around here? Man, hold on!"

Kay and I did the bootleg thang: turned out all the lights and looked out the dining room window... I told my brother there was only one person in the car... He said there were two...

Yeah, there were two people in the car, alright... I noticed that when the other guy, who was sitting in the passenger seat, came up for air....

Didn't bother me none... But poor Kay, who was already traumatized, was completely horrified.

"Them negroes got about 15 minutes to do whatever talking they're out there doing," I announced. "After that, I'm calling the Police on them, and saying they stole something..."

Kay almost fainted after I said that... She is so young, naive, and scary. She doesn't understand that sometimes, you just gotta make it do what it do!

I didn't call the Po-po that night... I rarely see the fellas , and when I do, I lovingly wave at them... silently hoping that all is well with them...

Oh how I love intown living!!

Now as for my wonderful neighbors who live in the house on the right side of me...

(stay tuned for part II... "The house on the Right")

Happy Valentine's Day...

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sorry I couldn't get you anything... but here's a piece of internet valentine's candy for you!

I thought I would post a piece of love poetry, or better yet, "love lost" poetry I wrote... Heck, it's just about the only piece of poetry I've ever written besides some old "Roses are red, Violets are blue" ish...

I'm no poet, you see... So you better catch it now, because it is all you will EVER see from me... You better get your laugh on real, real good!!!

If you want to see some nice poetry, go check out my girl Kayla... she's doing the darn thang over on her blog... just letting it all hang out. You go girl!!!

Really though...

But here's my crack at it... I wrote this piece about a month ago... I woke up one morning reminiscing about an old love...

A bit corny? Maybe. Most likely...

But this was just how I was feeling one morning upon awakening...


"I Wish"

I woke up at the crack of dawn
And before I did the usual,
Like give thanks to God for allowing me to see a brand new day,
Or even entertaining thoughts of what I would wear or do that day,
I thought about you…

And I realized…
I miss you.

I closed my eyes and I saw your lips so vividly
Their thickness…
Their softness…
How you would smile when I touched them.
How it felt when I gently kissed them…
Or how your use of them in magical places would cause me to scream aloud…

Such simple things,
But I lay here thinking about all of that right now,

And I painfully realize…
I miss you.

“Slow down! You talk too fast” I’d say,
So mesmerized by your thick Jersey accent.
“Girl, you so country!” you breathed,
Laughing hard at my slow southern drawl,

Such goofy things.
But I lay here thinking about all of that right now,

And I realize…
I miss you…

I miss your touch,
I miss my hand in yours,
I miss our long walks,
I miss your kiss and your sexy smile…

Such simple things,
But I lay here thinking about all of that right now,

And I realize…
I miss you…

I’m not too sure why I thought of you,
Loneliness is not an issue with me, you see.
Maybe it was because of the quiet realization that it was dawn,
And how I loved waking up to your familiar morning stroke…

Such a wonderful thing,
But I lay here thinking about all of that right now,
My body on fire…

And I realize…
I miss you…

I wish we could have stayed together!
I curse the day I discarded you.
Dismissed you…
…Simply flicking you away,
Like you were a worrisome piece of lint on my sleeve.

I was so young then…
Too young to care about the tears in your brown eyes,
Or the trembling of your voice.
I was so selfish.
I was so stupid.

Such silly things,
But I lay here thinking about all of that right now,
As I wipe away a lone tear that has somehow
Fallen from my eye…

And I realize…
Oh, how I miss you!


Damn… (stop laughing)

I wrote that after waking up one morning thinking about a certain man.

And that’s not even about my ex-husband.

That’s about the man I was slipping and sneaking around with while dating my ex-husband

...and I dropped this fine, chocolatety, 6'5" bald-headed, goateed up brotha to be with my ex-husband...

Somebody PLEASE hold the crack pipe I'd obviously been smoking and hand me a damn punch bowl....

**Ladylee in the kitchen raising up a beautiful crystal punch bowl and smashing it to the
floor!**

Damn! Damn! DAMN!!!!

Alright, alright, it's cool... HAVE A HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

with all my love...

Ladylee... The Original Oldgirl...

Birthday #36!!

Today is my birthday!

I turn 36 today!

And I don’t have anything special planned. Afterall, it is Tuesday. What can you do on a Tuesday?

All I know is that I am not going to jail, I mean, um, work today… I am thankful for my job, but I absolutely loathe it these days. Being overly bored can do that to you sometimes.

I decided that I just needed some time to myself, by myself, to think about the last year, and the year to come.

I’m not sure what this year will bring. I’m pretty content these days, which seems to be a crime.

I’ve been told that being content is akin to being mediocre…

Go figure.

But today, I find myself reflecting on some of my most memorable birthdays:

I had a birthday party at school the day I turned five. I was in the first grade at that time. I wore a baby blue dress with a wide white collar and red tie (I hated that dress, but Mother liked it.). Anyway, she came up to the school in the afternoon with a cake and ice cream and little radio, and me and my classmates ate and danced. That was a good day.

I didn’t have another birthday party until I turned thirty. I was living in New Orleans at the time, depressed and really hating life. But anyway, I was sitting in my office, and Harry Connick, Jr.’s cousin, Bill, a chemist I had been doing some collaborative research with, called and said he needed me downstairs in his office pronto. I was wondering, on my slow walk down there, what, if anything, I had done wrong. I walked into the lab, and everyone yelled surprised. I was truly surprised. That afternoon, there was another surprise party awaiting in the lunch room when I went down to have lunch. So I was completely shocked each time. That was a special day! My husband had completely forgotten my 30th birthday (I reminded him two days later). Oh well..
he was dead weight, and he is cut lose now...

On my 21st birthday, me and friend Timmy-Tim (who happens to be married to my friend and coworker Cowgirl Cre) left school and walked over to Underground Atlanta. We hit all of the bars, and ordered drinks. No, I didn’t drink anything, I just smiled when asked to show my ID. I quickly whipped it out, and then left for the next bar, much to the bartender’s dismay. What a way to celebrate being legal! That was a good day!

And last but not least, my best friend Lady Tee and I spent my 34th birthday together. This is a trip because we rarely get time together alone (she has kids). But we hung out all day, and went shopping (this was a big jump for me because I HATE shopping), went to the movies, went out to eat. It was so much fun.

“Damn, this is better than sex!!” Lady Tee screamed, while we were speeding down I-75 through downtown Atlanta, listening to Earth, Wind, and Fire, sanging real hard.

**Crickets**

Um, no… It was great, but not THAT great! LOL!

I think we were both just happy to hang out like we did in elementary and high school. We rarely see each other these days.

Something unexpected happen today, on my 36th birthday: My mother called. This is strange because we don’t exactly have a wonderful mother and daughter relationship. Heck, I didn’t even recognize the number on the cell phone. (And when that happens, I usually don’t answer the phone.) But we talked for all of six and a half minutes. She let me know how old I was turning today. (She likes to do that for some reason- weird). She told me that she has my first toy, and it is worth a lot of lot money, if I wanted it. I told her that was okay, she could keep it. She came over a couple of weeks ago and cleaned up my kitchen and living room. (I knew she would come through when I'm not around. Dang, I thought my sister Kay had cleaned up!). And she told me that she was proud of me and all my accomplishments. I nodded my head, as usual, even though she couldn’t see me.

So today has started off… interesting. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the day brings. I plan to hit a couple of movies, hook up with Lady Tee for lunch, and do some more never ending house shopping.

My day seems to be a bit full... But that's okay.

Overall, I am grateful to be here, to be alive, the blood still running warm through my veins, and all those other little things we somethimes take for granted!

Yes indeed!

The Mayor of my Hood, Part I: SNAKE

From what I hear, every 'hood supposedly has a Mayor, i.e., one who knows all of the neighborhood gossip, illegal activity, etc.

The Mayor of my 'Hood is a crackhead known as SNAKE...

Snake is the Ultimate Hustler. He is quite industrious, he is! The owner of a vacant rundown house down the street from me, next door to my friend and coworker The Infamous Hen-Dog's crib, left the water service on (how stupid!). So Snake, being the crafty hustler that he is, has been operating a rather lucrative full service car wash corporation from that house for several months.

He even gets locked up periodically for operating a business without a license... So you know he is doing good.

I remember the day that I first saw Snake operate in his full capacity as the Mayor of my hood.

It was a bright and sunny day, and I was sitting on the rock retainer wall in front of Hen-Dog's house with our neighbor Kim, going over some details in my manuscript, when a skanky looking prostitute name Clara walked down the cross street next to my street. She had, um, a few choice words for Snake...

"Snake, you "mother*****", I don't appreciate you brangin' no johns over to my man's house."

Snake, who was washing a car at the time, looked her way. "Clara, don't act like you ain't no hoe! I was just trying to make sure you got some business. I was trying to help you out, with your stupid ass."

Snake was loud, but calm... They fussed a little more. Snake went back to concentrating on the cars he was washing, and talking to a customer sitting in one of the many chairs that were in the driveway of the vacant house. Kim and I went back to reviewing a chapter of my manuscript.

"Snake, you a no good disrespectful mother******," the highly perturbed trick yelled. "Don't you EVER disrespect me and my man like that, you hear me mother******??!! You ain't right.You ain't no damn good! "

Snake threw down the waterhose and stomped down the street towards the pissed off prostitute. It kind of reminded me of that scene in the very beginning of Menace II Society, where Larenz Tate's character Mad Dog threw down his change and shot the Asian store owners... I have to admit that I was quite terrified, because it looked as if a serious ass-whooping was about to take place.

I know one thing... I heard some highly creative cuss words that day that I'd never heard before. Apparently my neighbor Kim was use to such behavior, because she sat there next to me and continued sipping beer from a wine glass, as was her usual habit.

Poor Clara retreated, needless to say... I have never seen anyone get embarassed and cussed out like that! After such a harsh tongue lashing, she scurried her behind right on up the street.

Snake turned to me, grabbed my hand in a hearty handshake, and said,

"Welcome to the Hood!"

Snake then apologized for his bad behavior, but Clara was insulting his character and integrity.

"LadyLee, I'm sorry, but that bitch had the nerve to insult my character and integrity, and I can't have that. She know she a hoe, and I was trying to bring her a customer. She know she need the money. Damn, I try so hard to assist the people of this neighborhood..."

Hmm... Character and Integrity... Assisting the people of the neighborhood.

*Crickets*

I got a hard and complicated lecture on character and integrity that day, and I get the same lecture every week... I just stand there like a deer in the headlights, and listen to him drop such complicated knowledge.

I'm not sure if I will EVER understand the intricate and complicated details of hood politics...

But Mayor Snake does an excellent job of keeping my car washed and my leaves raked... for a small fee of course...

Then he disappears down the street to get a good hit, I suppose...

All I gotta say is... SNAKE is one heck of a Mayor!

Yes Indeed!