A Whole Mess of Collard Greens

So...

A few weeks ago, one of my homegirls sent me a picture of some collard greens she'd cooked for dinner. She did what we all do: pull out a forkful out of the pot and throw it in a bowl to test it out. She sent a picture of some beautifully cooked greens in a small white custard dish.

Man oh man... Don't that look GOOD? Only thing that would've made that look better would be if the fork was solid gold. LOL.

And every since then, I've been craving some collard greens. I usually order them from a local chicken spot on UberEats, but I saw on the news that said chicken spot had closed down for deep cleaning when one of the cooks came up positive for the coronavirus.

So, uh that's a no, Captain.

They are back open now.

And that's STILL a no, Captain.

I remembered my girl saying something that peaked my interest, though.

She said she bought her greens in the bag, already shredded.

And I was like OH.

You woulda thought she told me that she went in her backyard, dug a hole, and discovered some gold.

Greens in the bag already shredded. Oh yes, I can do that! Why didn't I think of that?

When I cook greens, I buy them whole on the stalk, and spend time cleaning them. But I HATE cleaning them. Many years ago, my old supervisor's daughter Chayse came over, as I was keeping her for the day. She wanted something to do. I had a sink full of collards, and uh.. I taught her how to clean greens, and I let her have at it!

It took forever, but oh well. When you come to my house, you gonna WORK, honey. That day I taught her how to clean greens, and my sister taught her how to make cornbread dressing. That day, she WORKED! You gotta train them up!  Click on the link in the last paragraph to read all about it!

So last week, I bought a bag of greens. I bust open the bag and cleaned them.

It takes much less time. Thank goodness for that.

I like my greens a little spicy, but not too spicy. I had some fresno peppers that had dried out, so I added one.

I also cut up a whole onion and a little fatback. I haven't had fatback in YEARS. But these days if I go to the grocery store, if I want it, I get it. So I boiled my fatback for about an hour before tossing in my greens.

And I let those simmer for about 3 or 4 hours. Of course it don't take that long, but I cooked them to death like my grandma use to do.

And here they are.

I forgot to arrange them in a pretty bowl. I ate them too fast. I ate some, then I froze the rest. I managed to get about 4 quart freezer bags worth. That should take me through the rest of the year.

I'm not supposed to have dark leafy greens because I am on a blood thinner, but OH WELL.

My nurse said if I do eat greens, I better have the same amount every week.

Uh no. I only want a few forkfuls every once in awhile. And I had to have some that day.

Do you know that greens taste even better when they have been cooked and have sat in the fridge for a day or two? Or if they have been cooked and then frozen?

I don't know what that's about... but I am here for it!

Can't wait to pull a bag out and have a little... next month!