Food-for-Thought: Notes from the Triple F Posse Meeting!

This weekend I attended my first meeting of our beloved Triple F Posse. 

Better known as the Financial Freedom Fighters Posse.

We even have our own gang sign... as demonstrated years ago by my baby brother Milk and Cookies.


If you have read here over the years, it is just a group of us women, from all financial backgrounds, who get together and talk about financial issues. Personally, I like to try to read a financial book or participate in some type of class every year. Last year was the first time in a very long time that I didn't actively do anything to push my financial habits and dealings in a more positive direction.  I did ok, but I was just in my usual holding pattern... just working the principles I'd already learned in our meetings and the books I have read.

Well, the Triple F Posse has been having meetings this year, but I haven't attended. I'd see mention on facebook after the fact, in some email I missed, but that's it. But this time, for the April Meeting, my homegirl, blogger The Green Eyed Bandit, convinced me to go. I had missed much, but I know how she is. She didn't want to hear any excuses.

She knows that I feel like I don't offer much to the group. Like I said, I'm in a holding pattern. I just don't have much to offer the group.

But I decided to be nosy and... show my face.

Oh how glad I attended.

I wanted to post up a few notes and thoughts on what I learned.

1. Don't sink your ship trying to save someone else's ship. 

I thought that was a spectacular. Just awesome. Why? Because it is true.

Now, I have gotten in plenty of trouble over the years concerning this. For some odd reason, people think I am rich. Maybe it is because my name has a "Dr." tacked on to the front of it. I don't know what it is. But I will tell you, I have been called every name under the sun for not emptying my bank account just because...

Your finances being raggedy don't mean mine have to be. Nope. And you can't hate me for it. Get the heck on. Not gonna sink my ship TRYING to save your ship. And we all know eventually both ships will sink. Really.

I do my part in helping. But some folk you just can't help enough. And I simply can't afford them. I just don't make enough money. Sad to say, but it is what it is.

That quote came from the lone brother in our women's group. That was some serious knowledge he dropped. It was great to have a male's perspective on such, as he has been in danger of sinking his own ship many a time. He has built up the courage to be a little more stringent about things. And it gave me a little hope and courage to see that others have those same issues and have found ways to work on them too.

2. You can't control what people think. But you can control yourself and your thoughts about your path and your personal goals.

How true is that?

All too true. There are waaaaay too many times that I have made decisions, and somehow I hesitated on taking action. Why? Because I was pondering what people would think of it.

Tell me... how much time do we waste pondering what people will think of our decisions?  Or worse yet, when we make bad decisions, how often do we say "Oh shoot. People gonna talk about me."

How much would we get done if the ignorance, negativity and snickering concerning our problems by people who get a kick of us having a hard time?

Hmm...

Fortunately, the older I get the more I notice that I am growing out of this.  You know my criteria. If you're not being a blessing to me, and I'm not being a blessing to you, then you can go jump in the lake. I don't have time for the drama. And neither do you. I am FULLY convinced that out of the 7 billion people on this earth, there are folks out there more than happy to lift me up when I am down. There are people who won't laugh at my poor decisions, or my decisions to better myself. They will help me and encourage me. And I will do the same for them.

3. It can be a lonely place... the loneliness that comes with setting better goals for yourself and meeting them.

That one speaks for itself. When we are going against the grain, and not running nilly willy with the trends that the crowd tend to run to, then people tend to fall away from our lives. We agreed that that is true when it comes to sticking with a plan that moves us toward our financial goals. People realize that you can't do all the fun things you use to do. You are more stringent with yourself. You are trying to better yourself and your life. And people fall away when that happens.

4. Your financial blessings come because God recognizes your are being a good steward of your money. 

I think the brother in our group dropped this piece of knowledge. I agree. As a matter of fact, it is a part of my vision statement. I want to be a good steward of my money. No, that doesn't mean giving all your money to the church. That is an unwise thing to do. (And you know where I go to church. Interestingly, stewardship is what I've been taught. Be a good steward. A good manager of your money).

No, being a good steward means being a good manager of your finances. Taking the time to budget and get rid of debt. Your money is YOU. It represents the time you traded for your services on your job. So there is no wonder that people get all up in arms about it. Heck, we should. Your money is YOU.

So why not treat it with respect? And deal honestly with it? And have good motives concerning it.

There are no get rich quick schemes here. Only good stewardship.

5. What or who is sabotaging your success when it comes to reaching your financial goals?

That was the discussion question for the second hour of our 2 hour meeting. All of our answers were interesting and diverse.

Sabotaging means what is messing you up. So, you're going along just fine. Is anything or anyone keeping you from reaching the goal in a reasonable manner and time, or are you neglecting to utilize some resources to meet these goals?

I won't answer for anyone else, but while spending time listening to the others talk about what is sabatoging their efforts, I thought about my own. For myself, it is simply getting off track. I will set financial rules and boundaries for myself, and for awhile, I will be making great progress. And then I will say "Gee, I am doing well. I can take a break for a week from my rules, routine and schedules. Well, a week turns into a month. A month turns into two months. And before I know it, I have wasted valuable time and resources.

And that's not good. I have wasted valuable time and resources.  I have sabotaged myself.

I want to get out of that vicious cycle. So that is something I will be working on.

6. Money Mondays. I know that I said that I didn't go to meetings because I feel that I don't contribute much to the process. I always walk away with a few ideas and nuggets to help me along. And that is always good. But I want to be helpful at the same time.

My contribution to the meeting was talking about something I do every Monday. And when I do it, it is a good thing. I have been somewhat slack on it, meaning I may do it 80% of the time. That's not good enough. It needs to be a consistent thing.

I call it "Money Mondays".  It is just me simply sitting down for 10 to 20 minutes on every Monday and looking at my bank accounts and/or making a few goals for the day or week. Plain and simple.

The group thought this was a great idea. I did too, as it works well for me. I always have a short list of financial things to do, or I may check to see what bills need to paid, etc. 

For example, today's goal was to make a couple of calls about medical bills. I lost one, and they being all slow with the other. These iron infusions are going to run me around a grand after insurance, and uh... I need to get on that and pay it soon.  But I haven't gotten one of the bills. So I took care of that. I also checked to see whatever automatic bill pays kick in this week and to see if I need to make adjustments and what not.

I also go to traffic court tomorrow. So I took time to organize paperwork and pictures of ol' Lucy. I was telling one of my more spirited coworkers who, uh, seems to have much dealings in traffic court that I was gonna take a grand with me, and if that would be enough for me to walk free. To which she hollered "NO!!! You don't need that much!!!"

Cowgirl Cre said, her eyes wide... "Somebody gonna rob you and pay their own ticket."

O_O

LOL. I saw that I can pay by check. And if I can't beat the ticket, it is $194. I hope I don't have to do jail time. I know one of ya'll will come break an Oldgirl out, right?

So I thought about all that and took care of one of the bills today for my "Money Monday" goals.  I also made a short to-do list for the rest of the week.

Not bad for around 15 minutes of time concentrated on money matters, right?

I told them it doesn't sound like much time, but over many weeks, that little bit of time adds up. And over a year's time, it really adds up.

It is a small goal. And let's face it. If you are like me, you get overwhelmed by really big money goals. I have to eat it all like I eat an elephant... one tiny bite at a time.

Look at me! Making a contribution to a meeting! *cartwheels*

So those are my notes and thoughts following our meeting.

I am sooooo glad I attended the meeting.  I think it was one of the most poignant meetings we've ever had.

Thanks Green Eyed Bandit for coaxing me into coming to the meeting. I am more motivated than ever!

*throws up Triple F Posse gang sign*