Thursday, March 17, 2016
Of Camels and Bashes
We talk several times a week, usually while she is getting ready for work and I am getting ready for bed. (The UAE is 9-10 hours ahead of ATL time).
She went on a "desert safari" a couple of weeks ago.
My face was tight as a fist when she talked about doing it.
"You know we can't come get you, right?" I said.
In other words... Why are you out doing dangerous stuff?
"You are NOT in Alabama, where I can come get you. So be careful," is my constant refrain.
So she sent me a picture of herself talking to a camel.
"That camel was upset," she said. "He was moaning and groaning."
Never mind him moaning and groaning. I was shocked at how big he was and she actually rode the thing.
"Why he got that thang on his face?" I asked.
"Because they sometimes spit and bite."
O_O
"Why in the world are you that close to him then? Leave that thang alone!"
She laughed. "I was only trying to talk with him."
"Man... you know we can't come get you, right?"
She had a good time. She even went dune bashing, which cause me to groan, probably worse than the doggone camel.
I didn't know what dune bashing was, but it sounded... dangerous. So I looked it up.
O_O
*crickets*
What. In. The. World?
"Man, listen!" I hollered. "You know we can't come get you, right? It ain't like you in Alabama where I can come snatch you up. You on the other side of the world."
Yes.
She is on the other side of the world.
She is on other side of the whole entire world.
And she is doing things I will never get a chance to do. She can say that she lived abroad. And she really experienced the life and times of another culture.
So be it.
She can talk to all the camels and bash all the dunes she wants.
All I know is it is a chance of a lifetime, and I am proud of her for stepping out on faith and doing it.
And one more thing I know for sure:
I miss her so much.
Thursday, October 08, 2015
Sister Abroad Update #1
So, my sister Kentucky is faring quite well... Here's a pic of her with other teachers there.
That is her in the black and white striped shirt.
They ALL look happy and excited to be there. So that makes me happy!
She was assigned to Al Ain, some 80 or 90 miles east of the capital Abu Dhabi
So of course you know I went and read about the city.
It seems to be rocky desert land...
...containing a plethora of oasis.
That's quite nice.
She arrived there this morning (yesterday our time), and sent a picture from her hotel balcony:
How beautiful and lush is that?!
She is teaching kindergarten and she starts on Sunday. And she gets her apartment next week some time. Hopefully she doesn't have to buy a car, but I am sure she'll find something she likes if she does have to. She's been there for a week, and she's getting accustomed to the place. We've talked a couple of times a day, even on Skype. So that is great.
I still miss her, though. And that's alright.
I am MORE happy that she's seeing new places and doing great things.
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Sigh (Lord Help Me... Please)
Yet this was me this morning:
Why?
Because my sister Kentucky got her Visa and travel itinerary. She leaves for the UAE on October 1st.
She got her official email (her "golden ticket" as the teachers are calling it), this morning. She'd left the house (to go walking), but came back in. She went upstairs to check her computer. I looked up her facebook teacher page, and people were announcing that they got their info. She hollered down that she got her ticket too...
"Good for you," I said, my voice shaky. "I'm not gonna cry."
Yet I fell back on the sofa and cried so hard that my shirt was wet.
Kentucky flew down the stairs and sat next to me and patted me on my back.
"It's okay," I said, between wails. "You go on and go walking."
She got up and left a few minutes later. I didn't know if I should go to work. But I finally stopped crying, got myself together and left.
Man oh man... I don't know how I am going to deal with this. I thought she would be staying with me for just a couple of weeks, a month at the most, but I got the chance to spend 3 whole months with my sister.
My prayer on the way to work this morning was Thank you God for thinking about me so much that You gave me THAT much time with my sister before she left. Only You know how much I needed that.
I'm always amazed how God thinks over and beyond when it comes to what I need.. It never fails.
Now what I need to do is pull myself together, pack her up, and get her on out of her.
That much I can do... even with a few tears in my eyes.
Wednesday, July 15, 2015
A New Adventure...
Yes, that's me. The monkey laid out on the floor hollerin' "Lawdt".
My cubicle mate Lady M had the nerve to go on training AND vacation for 5 weeks straight. Ugh. She was texting me wonderful pics of the 3 week training (down in beautiful Orlando), and vacay pics from New York and Canada.
I believe I texted the picture above from me a few times. Along with angry texts of "Stop all this foolishness and come back to work!!!"
Humph.
She is the proprietor of our bootleg Sharbucks Coffee shop. It went from suburbia Sharbucks to hood sharbucks. I texted to her that Sharbucks was vacant, and the white folks weren't around. I tend to be antisocial, and not a part of that little crowd anyway.
She's back now. When I came in to work that day, I dropped my bags and we had a Celie and Nettie moment. And it was a good moment! I am so happy to see her! (And somehow, Sharbucks MIRACULOUSLY got spiffy for her comeback that week. Imagine that. Humph).
I've felt like the monkey laid out on the ground in the picture for another reason.
Last April, or roundabouts, my sister called me up.
"Guess what?" she said.
I knew it was something important because I could hear the glee all through her voice. This meant good news of some kind. "Uh, what?"
"I got excepted into the program," she said. "I'm going to Abu Dahbi."
I was driving at the time. And my immediate reaction was a groan from deep within, a groan I didn't even know existed.
"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwrrrrrrrrgh."
And a couple of seconds later, I cleaned it up. I grabbed some glee from some special part of my brain.
"Awwww alright! Good for you, Kentucky."
We talked a little longer. I wanted to get off the phone because I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. We eventually got off the phone.
And I cried every time I thought about it. I'm even crying now.
I just don't like to think about it.
My sister, the only family that I deal with on a consistent basis, is leaving for a 2 year or more teaching contract in Abi Dahbi. If you don't know where that is, it's a few hundred miles south of Dubai.
She's been talking about this for the past couple of years. I've sat and listened intently, doing my best to hold my selfishness down like one tries to hold a beach ball under water.
It's hard. I don't want my sister to go ANYWHERE, I want her to stay here with me.
I've gone through little mini-fits of sadness and moments of anger.
"Got dog, I ain't gonna have NOBODY."
Of course, that's not true. That's just an imagination of the worse case scenario. It is a fear.
"I ain't gonna have NOBODY!"
I've written fast and furiously about how I feel deep in the pages of my journal. I don't want my sister to go anywhere. She and I have spent our holidays together for the past decade, I believe. Our family doesn't get together for the holidays because it's such a mess (I split long ago, even though I tried. I just don't like bad treatment, man.)
Now I have to find something else to do. And I had to realize that I was doing a lot of "I...I...Me...Me...Me."
Just being selfish. To myself and on paper. With her, I haven't been like that. In my heart of hearts, I want her to go on and pursue her dreams. The USA feels like it's about to implode, with all this social mess going on. LEAVE. Go somewhere new. GO!
"Maybe you will go over there and decide to stay," I've said on more than one occasion.
I mean that. I've dealt with my feelings. I get teary-eyed when I'm with her somewhere, and she talks with such excitement about it to her friends or my friends. I've had to wail (only a couple of times) "Stop talking about it. You're making me cry."
We all laugh while I wipe the tears that are beginning to fall from my eyes.
She is leaving in August or thereabouts. I have had time to get my head straight and attitude right. We've been talking about her plans and all the legal things she has to do before she go. I've been attentive and as helpful as possible. I've been available for whatever help is possible.
I've been doing well, not acting out and falling out on the floor crying.
But... that is until she moved in with me on July 1st.
Her lease was up. No need to renew. She could stay with me. And when it's time to go, she could just leave.
But it's hard. So hard when she bounds down the stairs with her usual greeting of "Hey Lisa!"
Ugh.
And we hang out. I may talk to her an hour after work. She's usually upstairs when I come home. I grab her keys off the table and move her car so I can put my car (Lucy Jr) in the driveway. (I drive Pam a little now. Her car and my Pam can fit side by side in the back of the driveway, which is fine by me).
There have been many talks. I've been trying to pick her brain about her money. I just want to know whether I need to throw a couple of hundred bucks in a can every week and she uses that for her personal "getting around" and living money right now. She is being all vague about it (which is annoying). She has a couple of more paychecks from her teaching job coming. She should be out of here by then. But there was a heavy discussion of her at least thinking about if she needed some extra help. I let her know how much I had on hand, and what I could do. She is maintaining that she is fine, and she wants to work her budget out herself on her own.
Humph. Okay. *ladylee kicks the hard eyeroll*
We've been talking about life. She is beginning to have some issues that I am having now and have not quite solved. There's my usual retort of "You better work on that, because you don't want to be working on that when you are my age. It's much harder."
Sister Callie Jo is giving her a hard time. She's stealing stuff out of her room. Trash. A flip flop. Trying to pull clothes down out the closet. Callie's just hot that somebody is in the house. Mitch is giving me a look everyday that says "You know there's somebody upstairs, right?"
It has been hilarious.
Man oh man. I was doing good. But now I see her every day. We talk and we laugh. I fuss. She's vague.
What the world am I going to do when I have to see her off at the airport?
She talked to our brother Milk and Cookies about it awhile back.
"Man, you gonna have to come home. You gonna have to pick Lisa up off the floor."
I am determined that that will not happen. I may not even take her to the airport. I am trying to make sure she spend ample time with our mother. That's who might need to be picked up off the floor.
I'll be okay. I am determined to be okay. Whenever I get all teary-eyed, I spend time blessing her life. I spend time thinking about how great an opportunity this will be. I never had such an exciting opportunity. Oh the wonderful things she will do.
And that helps me smile through my tears.
As for now, I will enjoy her presence. I will even go visit if I can.
It is life changing. Less for me, yet more for her.
And that's a good thing. No... a wonderful thing.
Wednesday, February 04, 2015
Happy LadyLee Day, Part II
Not really.
I just claimed it as MY day. Why? Because she had a brunch for no reason... just because.
Not good enough, I thought, as I stretched my hands over the table and proclaimed "Happy LadyLee Day!"
No one paid much attention... We were too busy pouring drinks.
My sister had plenty of libations.
For the children, there were sodas!
And for me? If you have read this blog for any time, you know what it is...
WATER IN GLASS!!
Oh yes. If you haven't had water in glass... go get you some. Crisp and clean. No aftertaste. Go get you some.
That is all.
Then there was the liquor.
The Chambora.
Never heard of it. It was STRONG. So I had to investigate it.
Black Raspberry Liqueur. From France. Oh my.
Hmm, I thought. I still think of my sister as being five-years-old. For years, I would look at her O_o whenever she ordered a glass of wine at dinner. I thought I'd gotten past that. I guess I haven't. After realizing that she is in her 30s, I didn't make any of my usual comments.
There was much more liquor. Peach Sparkeltini, Avissi, and Bitch Bubbly!
Bitch has a bubbly. You know how much I like Bitch Wine. I haven't had any in years, but I have friends that drink wine, and I use to buy bottles of Bitch for them. Here's an old picture.
Bitch on ice... so nice... so nice...
But this Bitch Bubbly.
I had a glass (with glass jewelry. How fancy is that?) It wasn't all that. It had a weird angry aftertaste.
"The Bitch ain't bubbly," my sister said. "The Bitch is angry."
Sure was.
I had my glass. And I had my nice crisp water after that.
Yes, I will stick with the water.
But the drinks were nice. My sister likes a nice glass of wine. So do her friends.
I would've looked at her crazy if she'd brought out some Boones Farm or Arbor Mist...
Or some malt liquor.
Oh my.
Yes "LadyLee Day" was a grand success.
Good food. Good drinks. Good Friends.
And me, Your Friendly Neighborhood Original Oldgirl LadyLee.
Tuesday, February 03, 2015
Happy LadyLee Day, Part I
So...
My sister has been really excited about throwing a brunch.
She has been planning this since a little after Christmas, and since then, text messages have gone out...
"Saturday, January 31, 2015 10:30 am if you are available, I am inviting you to brunch at my home. There is nothing being celebrated... just come eat. Let me know if you're coming."
I was like sigh... okay. I'm going. But she was going to have to remind me.
There was another text sent out on January 24th that had the additional instruction:
"Come dressed super comfortable. Can't wait to hang out with you guys!"
By this time I was thinking... sigh. I have to get up and get dressed at be there by 10:30 am? On a Saturday??
LAWD.
I like to lay in the bed on Saturday mornings. Save for getting up and feeding Mitch and Callie. By 10:00 am, both of them be looking at me like "Yooooo... We don't care what day it is. We need you to get up and put out some food for us. NOW."
LOL
Well, I got up on the Saturday morning of the brunch and got myself together. I made it there around 10:45 am. Not quite CP time, but I was the first one there.
And then I saw this:
FANCY!
Man... I was ready to walk in the kitchen and grab my paper plate, plastic cutlery, and Styrofoam cup and fix my plate.
But that wasn't the case.
"Uh, am I dressed correctly for this?" I asked as I looked down at my attire of red sweatshirt, blue jeans and sneakers.
"Yes," my sister said. "I said dress comfortable. You see I got my pajamas on."
I nodded, still not believing her. And then I remembered that my best friend LadyTee wasn't going.
"LadyTee said she can't be here. She's taking Bobbie Jean [her mother] down to Macon to check on her uncle. He's sick."
"She text me," my sister said.
By this time, her couple more of her friends arrived. They all had the same reaction I had. Because she laid out a serious spread:
VERY fresh fruit!
Grits with a choice of shredded cheese, crispy crunchy bacon, and butter!
A nice salad of spring greens, biscuits, and apple danish!
Tequila lime chicken wings! Black cherry chicken wings!
Biscuits! And pulled pork sliders!
Roasted potatoes with red, green, and yellow peppers!
Sausage patties, sausage links, and crispy bacon! And behind that, strawberry, grape and peach jam for the biscuits!
Pancakes and french toast!!!
How pretty is that!?
Double chocolate coffee infused cake.
There are on the right is a kahlua truffle. And some muffins!
Sitting on the coffee table: some petit flors. I know I ain't spelling that correctly. But you get the point.
Those tarts are nice too.
Simosas. Non-alcoholic. I think that's how it's spelled.
Salad picture again. With italian dressing and ranch dressing in pretty bottles.
And on the end table in the living room: chocolate chip cookies, cannolis, and chocolate dipped strawberries!
Oh it was so lovely.
I texted LadyTee and said "If I were you, I would drop through Kentucky's house and grab a plate. Really."
She thought that was hilarious.
Man... If someone would have come in and said "You ninjas get outta here! Ya'll in the wrong place,"... I would have said ok, and promptly left. Because we were all dressed down. Too dressed down for this brunch.
We were standing around that table asking "What's all this for?"
My sister said, "Just because. Just for family and friends. Just to hang out."
I stretched forth my hands over the table and hollered. "It's LadyLee Day!"
That was my proclamation. Indeed. I claimed it as a day held in MY honor.
Amen...
And what a great day it was. We spent 4 hours laughing and talking and listening to music. I enjoyed my sister and her friends. There were only 5 of us, but we worked it out!
And we all left with nice to-go plates. Even though there were no paper plates available.
We worked it out with saran wrap and tin foil. You know how we do!
LOL!
Thanks for a great brunch in MY honor, Kentucky. I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
I told her that she needs to do this EVERY Saturday. And I would write a check to help out.
She said NO! (Imagine that!)
But I got another text message for the next brunch. It will be held on April 11th. I will be there.
Yes I will.
Oh yeah... there were even drinks...
I will post those up later this week in part II...
Friday, August 17, 2012
Friday Food for Thought... The Force of Habit
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Crazy Convos with Kentucky
Phone rings. I notice her number. I pick up.
"Wassup girl?"
"Hey Lisa," she says in her light voice with the hard Southern drawl.
She's an elementary school teacher, and she has been preparing for the upcoming school year. And with that comes the influx of new students... and the plethora of interesting names.
"I got some names for you," she said.
"Oh no," I groaned.
She usually spells out the name, and I have to attempt to announce it. (Note: I placed periods in the names so they won't come up on a search since they are so... original).
"This name is going to really trip you out," she says. "N.vee Miss Bertha Betsy Mae Wa.lker"
*crickets*
"You lying!" I holler.
"Nope. Saw that one the other day. And 'Miss' is actually a part of her name."
I pondered this. Why on earth would a parent name their child that?
"That's some family name mess. Those are names of grandmamas, of great aunts or something like that. Still odd."
Then Kentucky bust out with some other names. "There are some twin girls also. Their names are Shi.crayon and Shi.marker."
Wow. Some parent out there really likes their writing utensils.
Geesh. Have you heard of such a thing? That's quite... original.
Last year, the most interesting name she told me of was a little girl named Beefa.roni.
Nickname: Beef.
*blink*blink*
Mama and Daddy must love some Chef Boyardee. That is all.
Those babies have strange names. Those babies will go on to do great things despite that.
Anyway our conversation moved along from that tomfoolery.
"Hey," I said. "I need you to paint my toenails. I figure I can either pay you to do it or I can pay them Asians to do it. And I don't need a pedicure, just need you to remove the old chipped stuff and paint them."
"I'll do it," she said. "I just have to see if I have some fingernail polish remover."
"You think they got sell fingernail polish remover at the QuikTrip gas station next to your place?"
"No," she said through a chuckle.
"What's so funny?" I asked.
She giggled.. "The gas station selling fingernail polish remover."
"Shoot, they sale everything else up in that joint."
I heard her rummaging around. "That's alright, I found some!"
"Alright, because you know I'd run up in the gas station and ask if they sold it."
I told her I would come over. She said she had cooked dinner. Pork chops, fried corn and squash and baked whole sweet potatoes.
"I don't care about no pork. I want some squash and fried corn and sweet potatoes, though. And I have some greens and a piece of cornbread. We can share that!"
"Okay," she said.
It was noon at the time. I told her I would be over by four.
Then our conversation turned to more serious matters. I asked her about school. She was still getting the room together, and had been spending a week doing that. But she had received some news that she would be co-teaching with another teacher. Nothing much wrong with that concept, but the teacher was one of the most negative people she had ever been around, to the point of just dealing with her for any amount of time just completely drained her, physically and emotionally. And on top of that, my sister's teacher's aide doesn't get along with the woman, and they play off of each other (that means double the drama).
When her principle told her of the arrangement, she made a comment. She said she doesn't even remember what she said, but it was enough to make the principal look at her crazy and for the other teachers around at the time to snicker.
Oh how I hate for my sister to deal with that. If you have ever met my sister Kentucky, you'll quickly find out that she is the one of the kindest, nicest, most giving people ever. Very nice, wouldn't hurt a fly. Always looking for a way to be helpful to you in any way. Always. I think she is a really great individual. She is also someone who has the perfect game face, and she could be thinking something and you would never know it. She has that much control.
But for her to groan and make a comment or whatever she did... It must mean this other teacher must be a REAL piece of work
She said she went home and prayed about it. She really didn't need to deal with that teacher for the rest of the year. I could tell it REALLY bothered her. Knowing her, I am sure she shed a few tears.
She went to school the next morning and the principal pulled her to the side and said that she'd changed her mind and wouldn't have them working together.
"Lisa," my sister said. "I just exhaled. I was so relieved."
"I know you were, honey," I said. "I know."
"God sure did answer that prayer quick."
"Yes he did," I said. "And that's a good thing."
We talk about our prayer lives a lot. I think we both want to make sure that we are praying over our situations. If there are answers, we talk about that. We get in agreement on prayer over different things. It is an important part of our lives and our faith.
She has a very keen way of dealing with a variety of personalities, whether good or bad. I, unfortunately, don't deal well with certain personalities, especially those that impose on me and wreck my spirit. As a matter of fact, I am one of the most passive aggressive people you will ever meet, and if you rub me the wrong way, I simply don't deal with you anymore. That's just me. It's not the most politically correct way to deal with things, but man... I refuse to be in mental and emotional bondage to you. Sorry in advance. But it's not going to happen, honey.
We talked about that. And I told her I'd been praying about some help in changing my attitude in the way of dealing with and understanding difficult personalities.
And I got a really interesting answer to that prayer that changed my whole outlook. It seem to help my sister alot.
"I never thought about it that way, Lisa," she said.
"Me neither," I replied. "But it has helped me understand people a little more."
And I want to post about that answer... in detail.
It might help you, too.
To be continued tomorrow as a Friday Food-for-thought.
(Hey! The contest still on... don't forget to enter the 7th bloggaversery sweepstakes: comment for your chance to win a $77 gift card and other fabulous prizes. See bloggaversary post for details).
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Kentucky Funnies, Part II" "Corn and Cheese"
Every single time I talk to her.
Yesterday she called me about a problem she was having. We discussed it. We felt okay about the solutions.
Then we were talking about other things going on in our lives. I like to ask her about her hobbies, and how that is going.
She has a most interesting hobby: scouting out estate sales. She loves those things. I myself have only gone to one, back in 1991, back when I was in grad school. I bought a sofa, a rocker chair, a kitchen table, a couple chairs for that kitchen table and some plates for $75.
I kept that for about 4 years. So I know they are good places to find bargains.
And this has been my sister's hobby for the last couple of years.
And I celebrate it. She has had to hear my LOUD rants, when she tells me of how some of her friends don't approve of her hobby.
"Look here, gal," I holler. "If you decide to go outside and write "Kentucky" in black chalk up and down my driveway, so be it. If that's your hobby, be happy about it. Bump them chicks! I'ma be happy that you found something that you enjoyed doing!"
"Forget them!" I continue. "Their hobby is clubbing!! They just mad cuz you different!"
HUMPH!
I have an issue with people looking at someone else's hobby and giving them grief over it, and getting a funky attitude because you don't like to do what they like to do. I may not agree with it, this hobby of yours. (I will silently look at Kentucky like she crazy if she start writing on my driveway), but doggonit, do YOU. Enjoy yourself!
Just because I like something a little different from you, or different from the crowd, that doesn't make anything wrong with it.
*lee cartwheels down off of soapbox*
With that said, we had an interesting estate sale convo last night.
"Hey man," I said. "I need a leaf blower. You ever see those at the estate sales?"
"Yes," she said flatly.
"Well if you see one, can you get if for me?"
"Yes, I'll look out for one."
She goes on to talk about the website, estatesales.net, that she likes to go to to find estate sales in the area. She even likes and dislikes different companies that specialize in setting up and running the estate sales, and how she bases her choices of where she goes on who is running the sale.
"You can go to the webpage and look at the pictures," she said. "And if you see a leaf blower, go to that sale."
"For real? I think I will do that."
We continued discussing this. I loved the excitement in her voice.
"They sometimes have the kitchen groceries for sale, Lisa."
*lee silently holding the phone waiting for the punchline*
"They open up the cabinets," she continued when I didn't say anything, "or place everything on the counter, and you can look through them. You should see them white people. They go through everything."
"They sell the groceries!? For real?"
"Yes Lisa. I bought a can of corn for 10 cents one time."
*lee screaming with laughter*
"It was some good corn," she said. "I ate that corn."
"No way, man! No way!" I said through my laughter. Please tell me that you didn't eat corn bought at an estate sale."

"I sure did," she responded. "It was good corn. I even bought a can of cheese once. That was some good cheese."
*lee laughing XTRA hard. XTRA*
"What's so funny," she said. "You examine the can, and look at the expiration date. That was some good corn and cheese."
"If you say so, man! But ain't no way! Eww!"
Man. It crossed my mind to get my sister a grocery store gift card. I do NOT want her buying corn and cheese at an estate sale. I really don't. But I came to grips real fast that she was just meandering around like all the others looking for good deals, and lo and behold, corn and cheese were great deals.
She went on to say, "And Lisa, you have to go up in there with no emotion on your face at all. It's like you're buying a car. You have to negotiate."
*lee imagining her baby sister negotiating a deal for the cans of corn and cheese*
O_O
*crickets*
We continued talking. (Kentucky is a whiz at ignoring my animated ways. She ignored my laughing.) I need some furniture, and she gave me some tips on what to do.
The most expensive thing she's ever seen at an estate sale is a 10 piece setting of gold lined Presidential china. It was $10,000.
"I'll bust a sucka upside the head if they try to drink out of my cups and drop 'em," I said. "I sho' would!"
She thought that was funny.
"Kentucky, do they sell cars at these things?"
"Yes."
"Well look out for me a Lexus ES300, alright?"
"Okay."
And I'm sure my sister will be on the look out, and let me know if she sees one.
Yes, I am sure she will find me one...
Just like she found those cans of corn and cheese.
Thursday, March 03, 2011
A Kentucky Tale: "Becoming"
Last week, my sister Kentucky ran up on me while I was sitting on the sofa watching television.
"Lisa, do you mind reading something for me?" she asked.
I blinked hard.
She is in school right now, getting a Masters in Childhood Education, and she sometimes wants me to proofread class assignments from time to time.
This, in spite of my wailings that science is my area of expertise. NOT education.
She doesn't care. What I say doesn't even register with her.
She thinks I know EVERYTHING.
"It's just a memoir, that's all," she explained. "It is only 3 pages long."
"Alright," I said. I was a tad bit annoyed, as I was watching a good movie and getting my crochet on. "Let me finish watching this movie, then I will take a look at it."
I read her work, and I found it quite delightful.
I didn't know the chick could write so well. I had the hardest time teaching her her ABC's when she was a child. I still think about that whenever she runs up on me for help with schoolwork. I suppose I thought she still had the same isshas, lol..
I guess not!
Her story really made me laugh, and relive a few memories.
I asked her if I could post it.
She said yes.
So, for your Friday, a short memoir piece by my little sister Kentucky.
Enjoy!!
Becoming
I have yet another reminder from my Mama to give my Grandmama a call today.
I don’t drop by or talk to her as often as I should. I guess that comes with age, with being too busy.
I suppose she understands.
I often think back on the times spent with Grandmama, especially the times I combed and greased her scalp with blue Bergamot grease. She’d drink frozen milk with sliced peaches, and she’d doze off ever so often. Sometimes during these moments, she would softly call me by another name.
“Hey Lisa, oh… little Lisa. You look so much like your sister. That is why I call you Little Lisa.”
Grandmama would laugh and play it off as if I did not notice.
She also took me to vacation bible school and we would split a sprite and a hotdog during recess. She’d allow me to ask all the questions in the world, and with her soft spoken voice, she’d answer every last one.
I’ll never forget one particular day I spent with her, a day that changed my life.It was a warm summer morning, over a decade ago. I don’t remember the year.
“Get in the car and stop moving so slow!” Mama hissed. She did not carry me to the car that morning. She did not prepare our normal breakfast of grits, eggs, and bacon. She did not even pack us a lunch.
We must be running late, I thought to myself.
It was a very unusual start to a day.

I shivered and rub my arms rapidly to warm them. “Mama, I am cold,” I said.
She did not respond. She pressed the buttons on the car phone as we backed out of the driveway. She was calling Grandmama to tell her we were on the way.
I grabbed my yellow baby blanket and covered myself and Kari. It was still dark outside.I wanted to go back to sleep, while we are on our way, but I couldn’t. I stayed awake and stared at the lights of the cars and passing highway lights.
Before long, Mama pulled up in front of Grandmama’s house. I jumped out of the van and helped my brother out. We grabbed our bag of toys that we each put into our own “Going-to-Grandma’s” suitcase. Mama handed me some money to give to Grandmama.
We climbed the red steps that led to the front door, my brother and I. Grandmama was holding the front door open. She wore the same blue and white robe she always wore every morning. Her hair was gray, more like white. She had on her glasses and her pink slippers.
Mama was talking to her but it sounded like mumbling to me. I didn’t hear a word, really, because Grandmamma had my full attention.
Something was different about her. I’d never seen this before.
She had no teeth!
I thought she had them like everyone else!
I could not take my eyes off of her.
I walked into the house and into the kitchen, where I sat down at the small round yellow table. I could not believe my eyes. I didn’t know what to say, or if I should say anything at all. My usual morning routine when I went to Grandma’s house was to go to sleep on the bench in my grandparent’s room. But not that day.
Kari obviously did not see what I saw because he was already laying on the bench fast asleep. Mama did not say anything. And I could not sleep.
Grandmama walked into the kitchen, her slippers sliding on the floor. She sat her bible on the kitchen table, and sat down in a chair across from me.
“Are you going to go back to sleep?” she asked.
She sounded funny. I think she knew she was missing her teeth, or maybe she did not.
She had them yesterday. I’m sure she would’ve noticed!
Oh, my goodness, I thought. I just had to spit it out, as I could not hold it any longer!
“Grandmamma, where are your teeth?” I asked.

I could not believe that she was being so nonchalant about it. It was really a big deal!
All she could say is that they were in a jar?
I was full of questions then.
She talked some more, but I didn’t hear a word. I was in a daze. It just didn’t seem right. Did my Granddaddy know about this or was it a secret? How long has she been without teeth?
I came out of my daze long enough to ask the question that had so quickly consumed me. “Grandmama, why are your teeth not in your mouth? Why can you take them out?”
She answered in the same funny sounding voice. Embarrassingly she said, “Well, I did not take care of my teeth when I was a young girl. I had to get these. My gums are irritated so that is why they are not in.”
I looked at her. I noticed that she is embarrassed because she covers her mouth. “Oh…okay,” I said, letting out a sigh of relief.
In the words of my Grandmama, I know that it is not” becoming” to continue the conversation.
Grandmamma rose from the table and retrieved two white coffee cups with the Delta Airlines symbol on them and pours coffee into them. The light is shining through the window of the kitchen and it is time for our morning cups of coffee.
“Grandmama, I only want two spoons of sugar and a little cream,” I said.
She pushed the sugar dish my way. “I don’t know why you like such dark coffee.”
The day was getting back to normal. I could not wait until Granddaddy woke up up so that we could have breakfast.
That day, Grandmama taught me that there is always something you did not know before. The world is full of wonders. This was the only time I remember her surprising me with any inconsistency. Her house, tone, and attitude had always been the same.
She always spoke about the importance of “becoming” a young lady, celebrating life instead of grieving, asking questions and seeking answers.
The End
Wednesday, February 09, 2011
Kentucky Funnies
My sister "Kentucky" cracks me up.
That is not her real name. She has a very unique name that no one else in the whole world has. One of them ethnic names. Related to kentucky, but not quite. So I call her Kentucky for blog.
And she is funny.
So here are a few of her funny stories that have cracked me up lately.
*********************************
*us talking on the phone the other day. She calls me "Lisa" (family nickname)*
"Lisa, this little girl today was a trip."
"What she do?" I asked.
"She hawked up some spit, and spit on a teacher."
"What?!?"
"Sure did," my sister said. "Spit on a teacher, I couldn't believe it."
"What the teacher do?"
"Well I was watching this. I told the little girl it was wrong, and you not suppose to do that."
"She must've seen somebody else do that," I said. "She just four. Something going on at home."
[That is ALWAYS my first thought when something goes down. Somethings going on at home!]
"I don't know, but I told her, she was wrong. And if I had a belt, I would spank her. And this other little boy in the class hollered 'I got a belt, Ms. Kentucky! I got a belt!'"
*little boy struggling to take his belt off*
"I told him," my sister said, "I told him, Yeah, take it off, and when you do, I'ma give you a couple licks too."
*little boy frowning hard, quickly fastening his belt back up*
*Lee laughing hard* "No you didn't say that, girl! No you didn't!"
"Yes I did, girl," my sister said. "He'd been bad all day. I was gonna whoop her and whoop him too!"
LOL
********************
My sister left a comment the other day on my "bath salts" chemistry post. This is odd. She lurks but never comments. I called her up.
"I see you left a comment gal!"
"Lisa, I'm so glad you explained that bath salt thing. I had got mad about it."
"Why?"
"Because," she said "I was like 'Doggonit, now I have to show some ID and fill out a form to get some Calgon! I just wanna take a bath! Now I gotta fill out papers!"
*lee laughing hard*
"No, no," I said. "They just calling it that. And it's different from Calgon."
"First the nutmeg, not the bath salts. What's wrong with white people? Why they gotta put stuff up their nose like that?"
*lee laughing real hard*
"I don't get it, Lisa. You know it's not 'us'. You KNOW this. They need to get out here and do something productive, and get a job or something. Why would you stick stuff up you nose like that?"
Man, she was hot over the whole bath salts issue. She STILL mad over that. I just laugh at her! LOL
*****************************
Kentucky always calls me with strange names of kids at school.
"Lisa, I got a name for you."
"Yeah, what is it?"
She spells out the name. "C-E-N-O-T."
I ponder this for a minute. "Ceeeeeenot," I say. "Ceeeeeeeenot."
"No," my sister said. "It's pronounced 'SNOT'".
"What???"
"Snot!" she hollers. "It's pronounced Snot!"
*lee laughing XTRA hard*
"And ya'll call the girl that?"
"Yeah, that's her name."
"Snot!" I yell. "Come here, Snot!"
(Uh... I've officially heard it ALL. That is worse than a student of hers named "Notorious")
That's it for Kentucky funnies... Hope it brought a smile to your day.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Day Eleven - Your Siblings
My sister Kentucky! My brother Milk and Cookies!
Not their real names. Their blog names, given by other bloggers, lol.
Kentucky is 28 (She'll be 29 on the 17th). Milk and Cookies just turned 23 last week.
I look at them now, all grown up, adults, and I still think of them as little. I was 11 when Kentucky was born. I was 17 when Milk and Cookies was born.
I was there. I remember the first time I saw them.
I remember the first time I held them in my arms.
I even remember their favorite songs when they first learned to talk:
Kentucky: Chaka Khan's "I feel for you"
Kari: Quincy Jones' "Secret Garden"; BabyFace's "Whip Appeal"
(Yes, i remember. They sang those songs over and over and over. Drove me absolutely NUTS!)
Whenever anyone asks me if I have children, I say no. LadyTee is QUICK to holler "Stop lying, yes you do! She got kids. That doggone Kay and Kari! It's a long story!"
*LadyLee gives LadyTee the hard side-eye*
I've written, uh, interesting stories about their births here on blog- click here for Kentucky. Click here for Kari.
I'm older than them. More older sister/mama than friend that you can tell anything. They are closer in age, so they are closer in general. And I am fine with that. They have both been known to give me the side-eye when I holler:
"You gonna learn from my mistakes, or you gonna learn from your own. Any which way it goes, YOU WILL LEARN!"
They use to look at me crazy behind that one.
We don't see much of each other anymore. I don't like that, but life is life. My sister lived with me for the past 6 years. I watched her get her Masters and become a great teacher. My brother is a married man, has a son, and fights the good fight for our country over in Iraq. He's stateside now, and will be stationed in Seattle. I hope he doesn't have to go back, but if he does, I pray for his safe return.
I like who they've become.
I look forward to who they will be.
And I wish them both the best for the future!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
I've been slack about setting up some internet. That'll be cleared up by Saturday.
I was bootlegging off my baby sister’s wireless modem.
And last Friday, my baby sister moved to her own place.
So hence, no internet… and no sister!
*Lee falls out crying on the floor*
No, I ain’t crying. But it’s sad not to hear her bouncing down the steps, sharing with me yet another story of some of the crazy things her students have done. I also loved hearing her grad school woes. (But I am sure she got tired of me hollering “Jumping hoops! That’s all it is!”)
Kentucky lived with me for six years, I believe. Not sure. I just wanted her to save up her money, figure out what she had to do. My sister has always been a sincere good person, someone who one doesn’t mind helping out.
But I’ve gotten in trouble for this. People like to put their 2 cents in. “You should charge her rent, blah, blah, blah.”
But why?
“To learn responsibility.”
But, uh, she’s already responsible. Now what?
No one can answer that question.
One thing I learned from attending grad school at an Ivy League college: these white folks help their kids out. I was astonished at that. They made sure they had cars, made sure they had all they needed to get through.
That is something we are missing in our communities sometimes. Why? Because we have ALL been done in by peeps trying to get over on us. Just about everybody I know has had someone stay with them, etc., and they got used up.
I remember, some 10 years ago, sitting at the dining room table of my friend and cubicle mate Cowgirl Cre’s parents house, having dinner. I was telling them when I lived at home, whatever paycheck I got, I always gave my Mama some money.
Cowgirl’s Cre looked at me all perplexed. **Crickets** abound.
“LadyLee, you have to explain to them what that means. They don’t understand.”
Now for me, my Mama said she didn’t want any money. It's my money, save it, do what I have to do. But MAN, she knew how to whine and complain. I made that decision on my own to give her something, just so I didn’t have to hear the whining and complaining about being “broke”. It was like Chinese water torture! So that was why.
But I explained to Cre’s parents that this was common practice. You paid if you had a paycheck coming in. I noticed this among other folks I knew. (Never amongst my white friends, though).
That bothered me that day, as Cre’s parents still didn’t understand why one would take money from their child, their child who wasn’t a problem, but was sincerely trying to do well and get themselves together.
I have no children. But, I promised myself if my brother or sister ever needed help, I would help them. Long as they were setting their personal goals and achieving them, and being sincere, then I would help them. For me, that don’t mean putting out all this money. I simply don’t have that. But I’ve had to sleep on friends sofas, being what I have called “voluntarily homeless” from time to time. I didn't want them to go through that.
Me and Kentucky have always had a decent understanding about these things. She can be trusted. She has always shown me that. I sent her a hundred bucks a month in college and actually gave her a JCPenny’s card, just in case she needed a quick panty or bra. I told her too, I knew that Penney’s wasn’t her style, but if she needed clothes or something special, to go in there and look FIRST. If she could find something that she liked then that was good for her. This meant no money out of her pocket.
And she was never abusive about that. Always called when she spent on the card, and had some reason why she chose to use it. (Not sure what that was about, but if she felt the need to explain, then whatever.)
So I trusted her. I told her, hey, you can stay with me, and you do you. Now if you mess it up, that’s on you. I’m sowing a seed, and I’ll reap from it. From this rose one of my mantras:
There is NO such thing as getting over.
So it has been such a treat to watch her do her thing. I remember the day she came in and told me she’d paid off all her credit card debt. I remember her excitement over each new job she got, and the moments when she realized it was time to leave. (My answer was always “Have you prayed about it?") I remember her considering a career change, and getting accepted into a masters program for it AND finishing. I remember going to open house at the school where she taught second grade… and shedding tears as I walked through the front door of the school.
It has all been a blessing for me. I’m not sure where I relationship stands. I will always be the big sister, the black sheep of the family. She lives over near our mother, and I support their relationship, but I tend to stay out of the way (I don’t care for all the unnecessary drama and competitiveness *crickets*). Our family is small, and rarely gets together, not even for Christmas or holidays, so, not sure how often we will see each other.
But I know that I miss her. We are both quiet people, and now, the house is ultra quiet.
Oscar-Tyrone keeps going up and down the stairs, looking for her. I'll let that Oldcat deal with his confusion in his own way.
I walked around the empty rooms of upstairs this evening. It looks like a whole different place up there. I plan on a small office in one bedroom for my writing, a spare bedroom in the other. There’s painting to be done, and little repairs, since the house has settled some.
All of these considerations are overshadowed by the fact that miss her.
I told her last week, “Well, I hope I was helpful in some way. I don’t have much. My house ain’t the best. It's not the most luxurious. But I wanted to help.”
“You did, Lisa,” she said. “I was able to do a lot.”
I turned away, went and did something else. Didn’t want her to see me blinking back the tears.
I miss her much.
And missing her is trumped by the fact that I am proud of her.
I am soooo very proud of my sister.
You go Kentucky!!
Enjoy your new place! I hope it’s all you hope it to be :)
Thursday, May 20, 2010
You Did It, Kentucky!
"Let me know when open house is!" I hollered. "'Cuz I'm coming! I'll be there!"
Well, the day came for Open House. I went, but a little late, when it was just about over. (Got held up by the Opressor, i.e., held up at work.)
I walked into her school, trying not to bust out crying. My lip quivered hard when I saw the banner with her name on it.
I almost laughed because I was thinking, "I don't know her as that! I know her as Kentucky!"
I really like these wall hangings:
I like that second entry on the other poster: "Write in my Journal". LOVE THAT! Journalling at age 7. Hooray!
Another nice poster:
(We need that one hanging on the wall at work too.)
They say this every morning before class begins. I LOVE IT! I needed something like that back in elementary school.
I am soooooo proud of my baby sister.
One thing I love, and I truly respect when it happens: I love to be in on something when it is only a mere thought in someone's mind, when something's at seed level.
I remember my sister and I talking one day, and her saying "I want to go back to school and get my Masters in childhood education".
You know me. I said, "You can do it!"
She seemed a little unsure, still had research to do. My answer is always to talk to someone who supports you and is not gonna be negative.
"Come on here and talk to, Oscar-Tyrone if you have to," I hollered. "That cat's a good listener, and best of all, he don't talk back. He just want to be rubbed!"
LOL
But I remember her thinking about it. I remember when she applied for the program. I remember when she got accepted into the program.
(She ran downstairs hollering about how she got accepted. Thought she was gonna knock over my good coffee table, lol. I took pictures of her jumping up and down.)
I remember all the discussions about the complexity of grad school, when she'd come home wailing about some mess.
"It's just a bunch of hoop jumping, man! I got the masters and the doctorate! Half the stuff they have you doing is a bunch of BS. Hoop Jumping!! Just do it. This is all temporary!"
Yes, it's all temporary. Just like a hairdo.
Now I can say I remember when she finished her program. She now has her Master's degree.
She stood in my bedroom doorway the other night and said "Well, I'm done."
Yes, Kentucky, you are finished.
And congratulations to you.
I love being in on the beginning, when something's at the thought level, the seed level. Then it expands into actions and decisions. When the process takes place. And finally when what's been worked so hard for, when what started as a simple thought, comes to pass.
It is always an honor, not to go through that myself, but to watch someone go through that. And I always give a small offering, as a way of thanking God for letting me see this process, especially when someone has prayed about it, and it comes to past. I'll do no different for Kentucky. She's moving in June, and I want to be of some help to her! (I hate to see her go, though!)
My baby sister is the second in the family to have an advanced degree!
I'm proud of you Kentucky! I remember sitting on the living room floor with you when you were three years old, trying my BEST to teach you your ABC's, thinking "This little girl is NEVER gonna learn this alphabet!"
But you learned that and much more.
And now you're teaching young children the alphabet, and much much more!
So, Kentucky... I, your big sister, Lisa, am very very proud of you!
You did it!
Like I knew you would!