Memorial Day Weekend 2013... A Summary

I had a 4 day weekend this past holiday weekend.

Normally I would be doing multiple cartwheels over scoring such time off.

But not this weekend.

The reason I took leave from work on Friday is because I had a doctor's appointment at the crack of dawn. I took my sister with me, just in case I needed her to drive, and just in case I needed a second set of ears. She wasn't allowed in the exam room with me, and that's cool. I ask the doctor some of the questions she had, and that was good for now. We've been talking about it over the past couple weeks, so I asked all the pertinent questions and I feel good about that.

Now that went well. But the best thing of all was spending time with my sister. The appointment was at 8 in the morning, and we hung out for awhile afterwards.  We went to this really cool restaurant out in her southside 'burbs...

It sat on a lake, and had a waterfall. And ducks!

That's some dirty water.

We perused an interesting grocery store.

Nice place.Very high class. Just right for the upper echelon golf cart communty.Wanna be a Whole Foods.  It is more expensive than Whole Foods.

Your friendly neighborhood Oldgirl will not be going back. It is GREAT for that area. But seeing that it is 40 miles from my house, I'm not beating a path to it no time soon. Nerp.

But the weekend turned O_o after that.

My sister called Saturday morning and said...

"Grandma is in the hospital."

Shoot.

Her pressure had shot up. And she is diabetic, and her blood sugar was sky high. So she was admitted to the hospital.

I talked to my sister awhile longer about the situation with Grandma. Turns out there is much tomfoolery going on with her kids (my mother, my aunt and my uncle). They have been arguing a bit as it is, so this ratcheted that up.

I think a social worker is now involved. Sigh.

Grandma can no longer take care of herself and she has some progressing dementia.

I have a cousin who is my sister's age and she made a few suggestions (very very good ones, I must say) about how to handle it. She should be listenend to, since her grandmother on her mother's side had similar issues and needed home nurse care.  My mother didn't want to hear that, and in her usual manner, went off on her.

My cousin was distraught. Me and Kentucky shrugged. We've dealt with that all our lives.

So I have spent a good part of the day texting with my cousin, and consoling her and saying what I always say in these situations.

"It is not your fault."

And honestly, I am dog tired of saying that. And I think between myself and my sister spending time talking to her, she is starting to feel better.

And like my sister said... We've been dealing with this all our life.

And I made a decision in 2005 not to deal with it any longer. My peace of mind is too valuable for that. 

And I have had a time of it just keeping my sister's emotions straight when she catches the brunt of our mother's wrath. That alone is a job within itself.

You know, I was at the hospital for a few hours on Saturday. Grandma was very talkative.  I tried to feed her. That didn't work out too well. It was so difficult to see her that way. I still think of my Grandmother as the woman who played badminton in the middle of the street with me when I was a child.  (And she played like she was playing for the Olympic Gold medal). And to see her so frail like that was a bit jarring.

My mother arrived and I actually had a civil conversation with her for an hour. I showed her how to use my Kindle and she played around with that and we just talked. I showed her some of my book cover concepts. She wasn't giving me problems. She was all peaches and cream. But when it came to my sister and my cousin... wow. All of them had words.  I didn't.

I am like a UFO anyway... if anyone even sees me, it is a miracle. I'm not around much. So it may be in one's best interest to keep conversations civil.

More bickering occured between siblings. My mother ended up being admitted to the hospital because she was stressed. It is just one hot mess. My aunt is arriving to take grandma back with her, which is an hour away, close enough for us to take a short road trip for a visit.

But I had a food-for-thought moment with my cousin, one I have with my sister.  I tell them that they are at that interesting critical age, between the age of 29 and 32, where their personalities are still pliable. We ALL have quirks in our personalities, and if they can sit down and get brutally honest within themselves and start working on these things at that critical age, then they won't be 60 years old and wreaking havoc and confusion like my mother does from time to time.

Sigh. Sad, but true.

I have a couple of older readers who can bear witness to that. We are NOT the same chickens we were at the age of 30. Nope. And just like me, I know they would like a few minutes to just go back in time and shake, shake, shake our young selves.

But we have been working on things. Gotten past things.  And we found out that there was more to work on.

And you know, I actually read about that in a book I read a couple of years ago. You have problems that you need to work out, because underneath there are deep rooted internal problems...

Internal issues you have that you don't even know about that... but they are indeed there.

Hmmm.  I thought that was profound. And most likely true. Because we all have emotional baggage. And all emotional baggage didn't start yesterday. It started back in childhood.

I am in my 40s and I am amazed at the things that have been solved in my personal life and emotions. And I am astonished at what lies underneath: those strongholds that I continuously wrestle with.

But one day... you watch... one day. If I keep chipping away at the proverbial mountain with my proverbial dull butter knife, something is going to give way.

So I keep chipping away.

In hopes of not wreaking havoc and chaos in the lives of others.

Now if that is the only result that comes out of us working on our internal issues - not causing chaos in the lives and emotions of others - I think it is well worth it.

Me? I am my Mothers child. I have that very same violent streak that she has. Underneath, I tend to be violent.

This is one of the major reasons I sow seed. For me, it's like throwing water on that "violent streak". Get my mind off of "me, myself and I", and get it On someone else. On any given day, I can tell you the seed I've sown. Any given day. It is a way of life for me.

Today I talked with my cousin, ministered to her heart. That was a seed sown. And I took a coworker to the airport - ol' Lieutennant Commander By. He was about to get on the train. Someone was going to give him a ride to the train, which was a block from our job. He just had surgery to repair a torn ACL, and has been hobbling around.

I took off early. He parked in the garage, and his ol' crippled tail got in Lucy Jr. the Lexus and we turned on that air conditioner (it is hot as hell in the ATL this week) and we put on some Sade (his favorite singer)... and we sang ourselves happy... allll the way to the airport.  15 minutes in traffic.

LOL

Yes, i sowed some seed today. I didn't wreak havoc and chaos in anyone's life today. Thank goodness for that.

THIS is the reason I sow seed.  I do other things. And I am sure you work out your stuff in your own way.

I prefer intangible seed like that to tangible seed. Seed is seed nevertheless.

I am still concerned about Grandma.  My brother Milk and Cookies called me while I was at the hospital. He is stationed up in Seattle, and even from 3000 miles away, he was presenting a few options of his own.  I think between us grandchildren, we have open minds and some funds to help out with things, but I told them all that that's their Mama. And if they want to fight, let them fight. They will have to come to some agreement.

But that was the critical point of the weekend, with it's happenings and food-for-thought and conversations among siblings and cousins.

I didn't do much else this weekend. I stuck around the house for a couple of days, doing my chores, crocheting and writing (stay tuned this week for a crochet post, future-mother-of-twins Aretha).  I had my doctor's appointment today, and it went well. She has required me to get a lot of other things checked out with specialists over the past few months, which has me a bit O_o, but I have promised myself that I will just humble myself and do what I am told, since it is in my best interest.

So that right there is part of LadyLee working on LadyLee. In the past, my doctor and I have bickered  ( I always lose, of course). But I am working on a better me. And thank goodness for that.

And I think all will be well. Grandma will get what she needs. I pray she will be alright. And i hope there is something I can do to be of assistance... once her children calm down and stop fighting.

Pictures of the Week. Here's your boy, That Original Oldcat Oscar Tyrone. He's watching me crochet.

He knows not to get on the yarn. He has been trained thoroughly. He knows what a headlock feels like, because he has been thrown into one a few times. I can leave balls of yarn all over the place and he refuses to play with them.

Here he is at 2:00 am last night.

He is a punk. Dude cannot hang. I was calling his name and he was ignoring me.

Old man!

LOL

He has the right idea. I should be fast asleep, just like him!

Song of the week:  You know I am a Jill Scott fiend! This song is titled "My Love"


I love the arrangement of that song. And it sounds like she trying to lure away one of Kelly Price's men. Cuz you know Kelly got a gang of songs about some friend stealing her man. LOL

That is it for me! Hump day already!

Make it a good one. By design and On Purpose.