Friday, February 27, 2015

Friday Funnies... the Fashion Edition

So...

As you know, I sit in a new cubicle area. The people are interesting enough. Earlier this week I wrote about making cubicle mate E a batch of oatmeal raisin cranberry walnut cookies. E sits in the cubicle behind mine. I think he is very happy that I sit in front of him.

And then there's the chick that sits in front of me. Dr. Hazel Eyes.

I have talked about her before. That is my online name for her, for the obvious reasons. And when my brother Milk and Cookies was a teenager, he'd come down to the job to see me, and he would whisper to me in his best low voice "Is the lady with the hazel eyes here?  Can we go see her?"

*ladylee kicks the hard eyeroll as Milk and Cookies smiles with anticipation*

So now... I sit behind her.

And last Friday I saw her come back from lunch. I noticed the purse she draped over her shoulder. It had one strap. I thought that was interesting... and perplexing.

So later, as I passed by her desk, I asked if I could see her purse. She was on the phone at the time, but she handed it to me in one move, without looking, and while still continuing talking on the phone.

It was a nice purse. And it was a purse with one strap.

I brushed my hand across the cool surface. It was real leather, not that fake leather. I glanced at Dr. Hazel Eyes, wishing she would get off the phone. She continued talking. I looked back at the purse, examined the tag hanging from the side.

"U-G-G," I said slowly. I glanced back down at Dr. Hazel Eyes.

"U-G-G," I said again to myself.

"U Gucci Gucci," I thought to myself.

Dang. This chick done bought some doggone Gucci knockoff purse. I was gonna jone on her once she got off the phone.

Dr. Hazel Eyes had bought a U-Gucci-Gucci purse. The question was though, what did the "U" stand for?

Who knew?

"Look," I pointed, not caring whether she was on the phone or not. "What does this mean?"

"Ugg," she mouthed. She pointed at her shoes. "Uggs."

Uggs.  Those were some type of boots. They were the eskimo snow boots people wore. I only paid any attention to them because I saw some girl wearing them in the summertime.

Then I looked down at Dr. Hazel Eyes shoes.


Dang. When did the folks at UGG start making sneakers. Wow. And they looked like Nikes. Or Reeboks.

Of course I figured out after a moment that these are regular sneakers. Some Nikes or something. But for a moment I thought they were UGG. Well I don't know what they are. But I knew if I reached down and lifted her pants leg to look at the brand, she would kick my tail.

All while still talking on the phone.

She laughed later when I told her my thoughts on the U-Gucci-Gucci.

I decided to leave her alone while she is on the phone in the future.

This was funny. So funny that I can be dense like that.

Well, fashionably dense.

But that's alright. I got educated that day.

And you had to be there. It was indeed funny,.

And with that said, you be sure to have a good laugh... and a good weekend.

On purpose.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

For the Essential Woman...

My play mama Adrienne loves to sew. And there's nothing like spinning something you love into something profitable. Hence, her business.



(Here I go... jacking pictures again. And jacking good quotes)



Now that's some good food for thought!

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Cookies for Friends

I like cookies.

I like to bake cookies.

But here's my problem: when I want cookies, I only want one or two cookies.

NOT a whole batch.

They would sit around the house so long that they would go stale and I would have to throw them out. Maybe there is a way to freeze them. Hmm...

Anyway, the order of the day is to take any excess cookies to work. Let's just say people are always eager to grab them.

One of my new cubicle mates liked some oatmeal raisin cranberry walnut cookies I made a couple of weeks ago.

That made him a good candidate for receiving my excess cookies.

I made my old boss a batch of regular oatmeal walnut cookies. She doesn't like raisins or cranberries. When she was a child, she thought the raisins were flies.

O_o.

I look at her crazy whenever she says that. You would think that such fears would disappear in adulthood, but apparently they don't.

So I made a dozen cookies for her. And I made a dozen for my cubicle mate E. And there were 3 cookies left over. Those were mine.

He was very happy.  He even posed for a picture.


For some reason these days, I like to write messages on the bag of cookies. As you can see above, I wrote on his bag.

Here it is up close.


I noticed his wife and I have the same name. All these years I've know him, he's never told me that. So if I leave him a note now, I will sign my name now and follow that up with, in parentheses, not your wife.

Ha Ha! I think it's funny. (Yes, it is my own brand of internal comedy. Some things are funny just to me, you see).

I hope they made his day great.

The big smile and the big hug he gave me made me think that it did!

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

It is COLD!!

I walked outside last Friday, eager and ready for the weekend, and I saw a bit of sleet on my car.




My best friend LadyTee had called me an hour earlier and said "Lee, it's snowing out here by me [on the Southside], so you need to be thinking about getting out of there a little earlier."

I didn't want to leave, for I was in the middle of something. I even went downstairs to look out the windows (there are no windows in my area). I was expecting a wild blustery blizzard, but alas, it was bleak and dry out. So I decided to just leave before dark.

And I saw that sleet. Ugh.

It was early enough. And it had stopped. The ground was wet, but not slick.

But I thought that I better get on home before the temperature went lower, before wet ground turned to icy ground. I wanted to stop by the store, but it would be dark by that time.

But I felt more like this:


Not sure I would want to hitch it all the way to Haiti. But any nice Carribean island would do right about now. Sometimes it gets so cold that I'm not sure that we will see the 90 degree temperatures of summer we tend to complain about so much again.

I am wishing for that now.

Because it is COLD.

And it's in the thirties and forties here in the ATL. But it will be in the teens where I'm traveling to...

All I can say is.... GLORY

*forcing a smile*

Monday, February 23, 2015

Good Monday Morning... Birthday Sweepstakes Winner

It's that time again... Time for the sweepstakes winner to be announced!

First of all.... Good Monday Morning.

It's been a cold and rainy weekend in the ATL. Not really all that cold. But everyone seems to be collectively wide-eyed, trying not to get caught up in some tomfoolery where it's so cold that rain turns into ice and we all iced out and sitting on the highway looking straight up crazy...

But oh well. That didn't happen. And I need it to not do anything ratchet like that, as I am flying out to a conference later this week. It's only for a couple of days up north, but I don't want to be on the TV news telling a story of being straight stranded somewhere. Nope.

So hopefully all goes well. My weekend has been a blur of getting ready for this trip. I've pulled my flyest gear out the closet and making sure it all fit just right. And it looks like I am pretty much ready to go.

Anyway, on to the winner of the Birthday Sweepstakes. This year, there is only one winner. I kept it low-key on purpose. I've been so busy and distracted, that I didn't think I could blog as much as I wanted. But I actually posted all that blog posts I wanted to post, mostly reminescing about year 44. So I am glad about that. But since I said only one winner early on, then one winner it is.

So there were 73 entries. Here they are.
If you don't see your name, it's on the second page, under the first. That is mostly email and/or text messages. Sorry. By the time I realized it, I had cut up the names.

'Tis a small stack, as compared to my Dr. Parker soda can.

And that's cool. A low key drawing this time.

I have a new person responsible for pulling my names... I moved to a new building, and I found someone new in my area. Hence, Commander By has been fired. (He wasn't too sad about it. I think he is happy for his military comrad to take over his job).

The new person sits in my area in the new building. Her name is Commander "Git Jiggy Wit It!"

Just like Commander By, she too is a member of the military, trained in hand-to-hand combat. I NEVER worry about some active shooter, terrorist, or alien rolling up into the workplace with some tomfoolery.

I'm not all that worried because Commander Git Jiggy Wit It sits a couple of cubicles away. I will just go crawl up under her desk.

She got on her combat boots! Laced all the way up!

Anybody come near us, she will STOMP them. And when she kicks the enemy's azz, she doesn't have to worry about losing her footwear. That's smart, if you ask me.

She really doesn't even need to stomp a fool. She has deadly hands. When those hands ball up into angry fists, it is ON and POPPIN!

Fist's of Fury!

I'll just run over her way and be protected by her Fists of Fury!

Fists tough enough to take out the enemy!
In one shot. One right hand jab will do it!

Yet...

She has hands gentle enough to nurture and care for her children, a little boy and a little girl.

Hands precise and agile enough to pull the winning name of the Oldgirl LadyLee 45th Birthday Sweepstakes!

So it was time to pull a name. We needed a container. There was the plastic bag...

But I decided that would be better used as a purse.  A Jiggy purse, for when she was out in the field undercover. She can't carry her normal fly pocketbook, as that will cause her to stand out to the enemy.  She can conceal her Git jiggy essentials in this Git Jiggy Pocketbook and tape it to her chest. Yes. Undercover! Vice!

We can't have her standing out! (Especially since she is protecting MY freedom. NO!)

So we pulled out the Git Jiggy Cup!


So she shaked the Jiggy Cup...
And she shaked the Jiggy Cup!

And she pulled a name!



And the winner is....
That Oldgirl Chele!!!!

!!Chele!!

Chele! Your comment on the 9th on the Good Monday Morning Post Birthday edition did for you, hon!

Oh wait... Commander Git Jiggy Wit It has to officially certify the winnings...
Chele! You win a $45 gift card from Target or Walmart!

Go girl! I said Go Girl!

I like Chele. She's been one of my favorite bloggers for the last 8 or 9 years.

She is one of my favorite authors. I love her books.

And she is also my favorite SuperHero.

I think she had just won a figure competition. And righfully so. But that looks like some type of sword she has in her hands. I assume that is the trophy.

But she is a superhero in my book. I remember when she started that fitness journey, when it was a mere seed, a mere thought in her mind. It is always wonderful to read and be a witness such a uncommon thing happen.

And the trophy, it's a sword. She can take out some people with that... Hence Super Chele to the rescue!

All she needs is a cape, man.  Fab Fit Flygirl!

50 looks good on YOU!

(She is gonna kill me for jacking pictures off her site. Oh well. You need to lock those down, hon.You will have to come to the ATL and chase me down).

I've always wanted to meet Chele. That's a bucket list item. But I fear it would be like when Celie passed out on the dirt road when Shug Avery was leaving for Memphis. She is such an icon in my eye. Sigh.

I wish I lived up her ways. She has started her own personal training company. I would be a client. I would just have to get behind on my mortgage and mess up my credit score. I want to be fab and fit at 50 too!

Ok. Time for me to stop jocking!

So congrats Chele. Good for you. Holler at me on my gubment or oldgirlladylee email. Or twitter. Or facebook. Whereever honey! And if you want me to hit up a Sports Authority for the gift card, I will. Just make sure the sports store is near Downtown ATL, preferably out on the Southside. Okay??

I know you like Target. So holler back!

So that's it for the sweepstakes. Next Sweepstakes is in August for my 10th Bloggaversary.

I need to start saving up money for that one. What I want to do? I don't know if I can afford to do. But we will see. Yes indeed.

So watch out, now!

That's it for the sweepstakes. In honor of Commander Git Jiggy Wit It's first day on the job, the Song of the Week is dedicated to her!! Will Smith "Get Jiggy Wit it"



Not sure how long that will stay up before it is yanked. So enjoy while you can.

Thank you Commander Jiggy for pulling the names. And thank you for protecting my freedom!

Stay tuned for a full battery of posts this week, some automatic as I will ghost. And don't come trying to rob my crip. I have a bootleg housesitter. That should shock Mitch and Callie good fashion, lol.

Have a great week. Not by default, but by design. On purpose!!!