Someone sent me an email stating "Mam, your blog is crying out for a new post."
Ha ha. Okay.
I've just been busy. And I need to write down my blog ideas. It seems as if I think of something then I completely forget about it. I don't trump this up to old age, as I am a very young 44, but I blame it on not paying attention and writing things down. And that's my fault. I have a lot to talk about!
My weekend. I had a pretty good weekend. There was much "running the streets", i.e, running of errands and shopping. Our church has a Saturday evening service, streaming out of New York, and I can now go to church on Saturday evening. We have an Australia satellite church, and since they are 13 hours ahead of eastern standard time, that counts as their Sunday morning service. I decided to go, just to be nosy. It was super casual on our end, and I really liked it. So hence, I will be going again.
I am kind of odd in that I don't care to go to church on Sundays. I just don't do well with religious traditional issues. Yes, I pray everyday. I read my bible. If I see a piece of scripture I like, I will go buy a book on the subject and read it. I tithe, which is a rarity in itself among many people. Sometimes, in the morning before work, if I have a little time to myself before I need to be in for work, I will have a little communion, which consists of a disposable wafer/cup of juice that I keep in a plastic bag in my glove compartment.
Yes I do a lot of things. But I just don't do well with religion. And when I think of it, this religion, I am thinking of ideals which cause me to look at myself, then look at you, then make some type of judgment to holler "I'm better than you." I'm a little loss at that.
Does that make me a heathen? No. It just makes me one who doesn't care for the church crowd mentality. I am way way more interested in a relationship with God than with approval of others. I think with Church folks, it feels like you can never do anything right. I just don't care for the stress of all that. I have come to understand that I just don't meet up to people's expectation. And I really am horrible at churchy traditions. Just horrible.
But... I still want to go to church.
I've gotten knocked around a bit for where I go, but it has worked out extremely well for me over the past 13 years. Like I said, I don't care for traditional (or denominational) settings at all. I look at church as sort of a confirmation for some things that go on with me, instead of a barometer, if that makes any sense.
For instance... whatever I've been reading or meditating on, I hope to hear a sermon on it. And that never fails. And it gives me more to think about and pray about. I may even go buy some type of book on the subject matter. I find that I like church when it reinforces whatever I'm dealing with or trying to correct in my life and heart.
Now how did this turn into a post such as this? This is freestyle in the strangest direction.
I guess that is where my mind was at the time.
... And that's a very very good thing.
Song of the Week. Yes, it would be beyond ratchet to put up a piece of hardcore rap right now. I won't do that.
I don't listen to much gospel music, but I came across this song this weekend.
Lovely lovely song!! I'm sure it was popular at one time awhile ago. I have a gospel playlist on my Spotify. That will be song #63 on the list!
Okay, I promise to post more. I just have to write things down. I have some good ideas for this week. I wanted to surpass last years posts total. Might don't make it!
This post was for the one who texted me about doing a post. There you go, lil' chicken!
This post was for the one who texted me about doing a post. There you go, lil' chicken!
Like you, I also struggle with 'religion' and 'Club Church'. I do belong to a small church that is non-traditional. When your God-relationship is healthy and secure, His spirit will guide you.
ReplyDeleteI grew up in the church. My mother is a minister and my grandmother was a Pastor. Church is IN me. I attend regularly but I go on Saturday nights as opposed to Sunday mornings. I believe that my personal relationship with God is the most important thing and I would rather not get involved in the church cliques. I want to come in, praise, get my Word and go home.
ReplyDeleteHowever, at the same time I'm realizing that I cannot survive on an island. People really do need other people. Finding the right people is the real challenge.