Wordless Wednesday: Nephew Milk and Cookies Jr....The Bathtub Edition

Judge Shows and Oscar-Tyrone

There is one thing that I TRULY love about the holidays:

I get to lay out on the sofa and and veg out...

I do unproductive stuff like watch mindless shows on daytime television.

Like Maury Povich.

(I can only take so much of that. If I have to hear "You are NOT the father!" one more time, I'm going to throw my television through the window.)

No, I like the Juuuuudddddge Shows!

Maybe 6 months ago, when I attended a Friday morning bible study, one of our assistant ministers, Minister Betty, said "Ya'll need to come on to church on Friday morning. All ya'll doing is watching the Judge shows. You can come on in to bible study instead of watching the Juuuuuddddge shows."

I hear ya, Minister Betty. But uh, church campus was closed on the Friday after Thanksgiving.

So me and my sister hung out and watched the Juuuddddge shows.

We watched some Judge Alex...



Some Peoples Court!

(Not sure what was happening here. Maybe a fade out to commercial).



But we were still watching the Juuuuuddddggge shows!

Me and Kentucky watched some of that Judge Joe Brown.

I think we might have caught an episode of the Judge Judy too.

Ain't nothing like a good Judge show.

But it never ceases to fail... when I lay out on the sofa, Oscar-Tyrone creeps up on me. Usually it is when I'm asleep. And it is when i am coming out of my sleep, and I have a strange strange feeling that someone... no something is watching me.



It's Oscar-Tyrone. The Original Oldcat.

He has that look in his eye. And he is thinking, "I am waiting, Oldgirl, for you to rub me. I need attention."

Then if I don't acknowledge him, he seems to move in a little closer.



I may or may not rub him. I most likely will turn over and go back to sleep. Or I'll get up and go do something else.

My sister was sitting in the easy chair. He had been bothering her, but I suppose he got bored with her... and decided to stare at me.

And when I continue to lay there... and watch my Juudddddge shows.

He will... Reach out and Touch.



*crickets*

Not sure what that's about...

He would impress me more if he meowed "Reach out and Touch... somebody's hand! Make this world a better place... If you can!"



*Oscar gets smacked in his forehead and quickly runs away*

LOL!!

Sorry man! That joker has some SHARP claws!

I can't wait until the next holiday...

So we can do it all over again.

So Long, Sir. Good-bye.

So...

Herman Cain has left the building.



That is, he has "Suspended" his campaign for President.

Did ya'll get all of your banners and t-shirts?

You get your commemorative napkins and plates, bumper stickers and flags?

(Was there ever any of that?)

I would've liked something with the campaign slogan on it.

Because it is all over now.

You know me. I don't do what others do: sit up and criticize and joke about things like this.

Life changing things like this.

Reminders like this.

It is a STARK reminder that I, LadyLee, don't need to run for president.

I don't need to run for president of the USA. I don't need to run for president of the PTA. Nothing.

I ain't perfect like most people I know.

Perfect people: they lay in wait... and watch for any high profile person to go through something, to be caught in the middle of something, for secret lives to be exposed. So they can make jokes and jive about it.

I don't knock those people. I think we have been trained in that mentality. Entertainment and Gossip shows have been on the TV since I can remember, maybe before I was even born.

I am trained in leaning in and tuning in to hear about the sensational. It makes my heart rush. I gasp at the juicy revelation.

It makes me feel better about the monotony of my own life, you see...

Or it takes my mind off of the issues of my life that I haven't had the courage to resolve.

When these things happen, I see them. I am O_o and O_O just like the next person.
But I am a little different.

I immediately ponder my own life, these 40-something years I've been in existence.

I, LadyLee, can PROMISE you... I will NEVER run for political office, much less President of these United States of America.

And I also think of something else: skeletons.

We all have skeletons in our closet.

Well let me speak for myself, since I don't know all 7 billion people on this planet.

I have skeletons in my closet. And my closet is small. Yet, the skeletons are crowded up in there, with their sharp pointy elbows, pointy knees all making each other uncomfortable. And here I come, opening the closet door and throwing another skeleton in there...

And another one.

*lee looking around to make sure no one is watching when she opens the closet door*

And another one....

They, these tightly packed skeletons, are always waiting for their chance to bust out of their confined space, and run out the house... and run straight out into the street into oncoming traffic.

You can imagine the chaos and confusion that causes.

That is what happens when the light is shined on one's life.

I don't want the light shined on my life like that. Hence, my uh, repulsion to running for any type of office.

I can see myself walking past the TV and seeing a dude I was messing with some 20 years ago on TV talking about our shenanigans.

Got an Oldgirl hollering "What rock did THAT ninja come out from under!?!?!"


LOL

I want the courage and due-diligence and maturity it takes to voluntarily shine the light on my own problems and dark areas and make the appropriate corrections, instead of doing it when I get caught.

And now, Mr. Cain, your business is in the streets. The same people laughing at you have probably done the same... or much worse.

But we will never know, will we?

Hmm.

It was a great run. The prospect of having 2 black men run against each other to lead our great country... uh, I never thought I would see such a thing.

So, so long, Sir. Good-bye.

This politcal game is what it is: a game. And if you are a threat, they coming after you. Heck, if you aren't a threat, they coming after you.

It is how the game is played. Political or otherwise.

This post was approved by Your Friendly Neighborhood Oldgirl LadyLee.

You have a great week... on purpose.

Friday Freestyles... The Nightime Edition

It's Friday!

5:50 p.m. And the only reason I am typing up a post here at work is because I don't have anything else to do but...

Watch...

The...

Clock...

Until it is time to GO...

Sigh.

You know it is bad when you have to go ask for work to do. I honestly don't think I was given anything because I was one of the only few who was here during the Thanksgiving Holiday week, and I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off! I was glad for the workweek again.
Alas, work is slow. I was able to close out some things I was working on, so that is good.

And it's a NEW day at work! We have a new permanent supervisor.

*cartwheels*

If you have read this blog for some years, it is Ol' Mean Ass Cynthia.

*snicker*

This is going to be interesting.

You know, I was telling some coworkers, they can bring Baton Bob in here to be our supervisor and I am cool with that.

(Baton Bob. He's a man that dresses up in tutus and wedding dresses, and walks or marches through Midtown with a magic wand or baton, bringing joy to us all.)





Yeah, you can bring Baton Bob up in here. LadyLee just want a PERMANENT supervisor. This 30-60 day detail jazz is NOT a good thing. But it has worked out okay. Just wanna see someone PERMANENT. Last chick did a good job. Good job = don't try to work out your self esteem issues by playing jedi mind tricks on me and making my life miserable. She didn't do that. Good job. Wouldn't bother me if she got the job permanently. I just want someone PERMANENT.

And alas. We have that.

I was standing at the copy machine fussing HARD with my specialist about the difference between sorghum and rice, fussing extra hard, when... we both got a twinkle in our eye, and a smile on our faces.

"Let's go ask the new supervisor!!"

*lee and specialist skipping arm-in-arm to the supervisor's office*

Apparently she heard the whole confrontation, as she was sitting at her desk, looking... surley. She isn't official until December 5th, she said.

WHO CARES? You gonna answer this sorghum and rice question, Annie Mae!!!

And she did. Quite well. And we were... happy for a change.

So that is a good thing. Our group is very much damaged. Hope she can deal with our dysfunctionality. I sure she will do just fine.

She stopped by my desk, asked if there was any additional training I wanted to go to (something like that.)

"No thank you," I hollered, cutting her off. "Ya'll just make sure to have my check every two weeks."

She tried to continue. I repeated myself.

She rolled her eyes hard and walked away!

LOL!

(But for real... best make sure my money is straight. That is all. Done took ALL the classes. Aint' repeating NUTHING. Have my money straight. Much obliged).

Well that is the good news of the week. And that makes it a great week.

So... I hope you all have a fantastic weekend...

ON PURPOSE.

(You know I will! Really though!)

Sweets, Part I

So... I baked wonderful pies for Thanksgiving.


Two sweet potato pies, and one peach pie. And they were small 4" pies.

Gorgeous! Beautiful!

As you can see, my lattice crustwork skills are not up to par.

*lee hits desk with fist, frowns in anger*

Look here! I am NOT Betty Crocker! I am your Friendly Neighborhood Oldgirl, LadyLee!

The edges of my crust... they ain't really all that tight either.

But you know what!? Those little pies were great. I am so happy that my Auntie gave me those small pie tins some 5 years ago. I have put them to great use!

(I just have to work on my crust beautification skills. LOL)