Thursday, March 28, 2013

Food for Thought: Open-Mindedness

One of my favorite readers Lisa B. text me yesterday and asked for a Food-for-Thought post. So I thought I'd post something from one of the books I am currently reading. 

I am reading a fabulous book right now.

Walking into Walls: 5 Blind Spots that Block God's Work in You by Stephen Arterburn.

This book is a real in-your-face eye opener. I have been reading it for the past few weeks, just a few pages or a whole chapter here and there. I can't seem to finish because I am reading some chapters two or three times. It is just that good. This book is a real gem.

Sometimes Joyce Meyer has special guests on her show and they have a sit-down discussion about various topics, and one day last month, I believe, the author was a guest. I believe he is a Christian based therapist of some type. They were discussing some really serious topics like the root of addictions and what not. I found it all very interesting. They briefly mentioned the book, as it wasn't a show about the book. I remember having to make sure to catch the name of the book on a second episode, since it was so briefly mentioned.

Anyway, I found out something interesting while reading this book:

I have been working really hard on various areas of my life. For years. YEARS. And I will continue to do so. But this is the first book that really went into depth concerning many of the things I had been working on. Many of things I've done to solve some of my attitude problems were detailed in this book.

And here I thought I was doing something original concerning myself. Humph.

But it was good to read about many of my problem areas, some of which are no longer problem areas. And thank goodnees I had the fortitude back in my late 20s and early 30s to recognize that I needed to change in some areas of my life.

The book was a detailed discussion of the many "walls" that keep us from moving forward.

The Wall of Stubborn Resistance
The Wall of Arrogant Entitlement
The Wall of Justifiable Resentment
The Wall of Disconnected Isolation
The Wall of Blind Ignorance

I won't discuss them all.  That in itself would take forever, lol.

But there was one section, a portion within the chapter on the The Wall of Stubborn Resistance, that caught my attention.

It was a section on "Open-mindedness".

I think it resonated with me because it is one of the areas that I have been working on for awhile.

First of all, there were some interesting questions to evaluate if you or open-minded. I will list some here.
(Refernce: Chapter

How frequently do I admit that I am wrong?
How frequently do I ask for forgiveness?
How frequently do I ask people for their opinion?
Do I ever admit that I have been approaching problems in unhealthy ways?
Am I willing to admit that I might need help to move beyond the walls in my life?
Have I ever said, "You knew I was this way when you married me?"
Do people tell me, or do I feel that I have a strong need always to be right?
Do I stop listening to people who try to get me to see things in different ways?
Am I a "my way or the highway" kind of person?

Those are some hard-nosed questions.

There was a good chapter that defined the term "open-mindedness". It is defined as:

1. The ability to see things from another person's perspective
2. The willingness to acknowledge that there are other points of view other than your own.
3. The ability to realize that you may not always be right.
4. The ability to realize that you need to make things right when they are wrong.
5. The willingness to be quiet for awhile and listen to someone else.
6. The ability to consider counseling or recovery, because their is a wealth of information available that you may not otherwise find on your own.

I found all of this so interesting. For some reason, it stuck with me the most of everything out of the book.

I think it is because I run into close-minded people on a regular basis. It irks me to no end. And it always reminds me that I need to continually work on myself in that area.

I don't do well at all around close-minded people. Especially if they are over 40. Let's face it, when us over 40 folks have our habits and attitudes, they are bit deep rooted. That is why I ALWAYS tell folks in their late 20s or early 30s to go ahead and work on their attitudes, goals, etc. Just do it. Start then! Not later.

And then we start walking on the dark side. I am not only close-minded, but now I have a problem with you because your beliefs are different from mine. And I'm trying to convince you that I am right. I am always right. Sigh.

Let's face it. You're not the only person walking on this earth. Not everyone has your exact set of experiences. I realize it about myself, even. It doesn't even cross my mind to argue with people about religion, beliefs and the like. Why? Because your beliefs may or may not be similar to mine.

And I don't argue about it. I am open-minded enough to listen to your point of view. I am not only concerned in what your opinions are, but the "why" behind it. That gets to the core of who a person truly is deep inside.

And I don't see that way of thinking too much. We're too busy fighting and fussing. Not willing to consider other points of view. And that's the main reason for all this conflict.

Look at the hot topics in the news. Especially today. Our close-mindedness births conflict. So sad.

So I thought I would post up a little something I read from the book that has stayed on my mind. I keep going back and reading this section. I think it was worth posting so I can come back to it when I need to.

There you go, Lisa B! Hope you enjoyed that specially ordered food-for-thought :)

5 comments:

  1. I will be getting this book. It sounds really good. Always looking to improve myself and expand my mind....so annoying when others refuse and you have to be around them....

    ReplyDelete
  2. I just ordered my copy. I am currently reading Prayer: Finding the Heart's True Home by Richard J. Foster. I am doing a study of my own on prayer and I found this on a blog. It is interesting. I am slowly reading it. I plan to read the book I just ordered after this one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This looks like it will be interesting. Im gonna grab it for myself. Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sounds interesting.

    I'm actually reading After Rome by Morgan Llywelyn. It's kinda interesting, but not quite as interesting as I thought when I first picked it up in Barnes and Noble.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love the questions that were asked. A couple of them have made me think.

    ReplyDelete

Slap the *crickets* out the way, kindly step up to the mike, and SAY something!!