State of the Garden, Part II

So...

I haven't talked about the garden since I posted about it back on May 2nd, when it looked like this:

Why is that? Because I haven't been all that excited about the garden.

1. It is hot outside.

2. The mosquitos smile big and wide when they see me coming. I think I have what the ol' folks call "Sweet Blood". Mosquitoes like that. HUMPH.

3. I work 10, sometimes 12 hours a day. When I get home, I ain't thinking about going outside doing ANYTHING! I'm trying to get in the house, in the cool, cool air, and RELAX.

4. It is HOT outside!!!

But, one of the neighborhood crackheads locals, Mr. Thomas (seen in the photo, threatening me with a rake,*crickets*), knocked on my door one Saturday afternoon. Usually I don't open the door, and they know this. But I think he caught me coming into the house or something.

"What you want man?"
"Gimme 2 dollars, girl."
"Man, what did I tell you? I don't have cash on me." I have TRIED to explain the whole debit card phenomena to him numerous time, but he just gives me the *blank stare*. He don't seem to understand.
"I know you got some money around here somewhere!"

We argue back and forth.
Then he says...

"I was in your backyard. I see you got some good ol' beans out there!"
"No I don't."
"Yes you do."
"No I don't."
Yes you do, ol silly girl!!"
"I was just out there a couple of days ago. There were a bunch of flowers, but that's it."
"Well, you got beans, girl!!"

We walk around to the backyard, and lo and behold, I did have beans!

So, that next day, I picked them. Along with some random peppers.

This is my first harvest. HOOORAAAY. (Naw, I ain't that excited).

There were not many beans. That's alright. I HATE SNAPPING BEANS. So I washed them and snapped them.

Now, I usually cook my beans with smoked chicken and potatoes, but I was too lazy to run out to Decatur and get my smoked chicken. So, I know my baby blog sista Serenity 3-0 is a bean fiend, and cooks them with sausage and potatoes.

We had a convo about it over our daily email thread.

"S, how do you do your beans with the sausage and potatoes?"
"I just cut up my potatoes and sausage and cook them with the beans."
"What kind of sausage?"
"Beef."
"What kind of potatoes?"
"Regular potatoes."
"I know, but do you use the red small potatoes, the Idaho, the russet?"
"I don't know LadyLee, they are white."
"Well, what are the amounts that you use?"

She snapped on me after that, and I didn't ask anymore questions. She should know by now that I am inquisitive and I ask a BUNCH of questions. Baby sisters can be real bitches mean girls at times. After that, I wrote back, questioning if it was her time of the month or something. HUMPH.

I decided to bootleg it, and hope it worked out.

But here's the result:


It look good, don't it?

It WAS good!

Get a little closer!!

Yeah... that's what's hot right there. I got a little to crazy with the black pepper, but it was alllll good.

Bootleg recipe for "Serenity Beans":

3 cups of beans, snapped
1.5 cups of potatoes (use more or less if you like)
1 cup of cut of sausage
1 small onion, sliced.
3 cups of water
salt and pepper to taste

Boil the sausage and onion in water for a little while. Add the beans and potatoes and boil a little while. Add more water if necessary. Stir it up. Watch it so it will not burn!!

Yeah, I'm vague. And you know what? YOU are grown. Work it out from there.

LOL!!!

Now, all of this went down last week... Time to harvest MORE beans and peppers.

Yesterday, my coworker, ol' Mean Ass Cynthia asked if her baby Chayse could come pick some beans. Chayse planted peppers in the garden back on Memorial Day. She was a great little worker!

*LadyLee smiling real hard*

I said "Sure, of course she can come over. Anytime!!"

You know, there ain't nothing in the world like a little slave child labor.

Nothing like it.

LOL!!!

I got beans, Man!!!!

Guess what?

I got beans, Man!!!


Beans, beans, and more beans!!!!

Stay tuned...

I got worms, Man!

For that Botanical Chick Carleen's amusement, because I think she'd give a *blank stare* and get a kick out of this, lol.

Somethin's nibblin' on my cabbages!
I said. . . Something's eating my cabbages!!!!!!

I have two cabbage plants out in the garden, and something is taring them up! Most likely, it's cabbage worms!

I got worms, Man!

*LadyLee faints out in the afternoon sun*

No, I didn't faint. But I did laugh.

It all reminded me of my group secretary Dee's gardening dilemma.


Dee likes to grow collard greens in her garden every year.

It's always a joy to hear her exclaim with such fervor and glee...

"Dr. LadyLee, I got some collards growing out there in the garden!"

"Chile, they are delicious. Picked 'em just before that first frost. They were so good."

So, a few years ago she came over and sat in the cubicle area. She comes over and sits and chit-chats with us from time to time.

I asked her about her beloved collard greens.

"Dee, how them greens growing this year?"
She got all quiet. Her eyes got big. "I guess they alright," she said, her voice quiet.
"What's wrong?" I asked. "You having problems with them?"
"Chile, the bugs was getting all in them. Eating up my good greens!"
"That ain't good, Dee."
She got all quiet again. Eyes got all big again. "I sprayed some spray on them, Dr. LadyLee."

I guess I could see why she was worried. Many folks like their garden to be organic, with no pesticides.

"That's alright, Dee. Gotta get rid of the bugs, you know."
"Chile, I sprayed some Hot shot on them greens."

Now, there were several of us milling around, but when she mentioned the Hot Shot Bug spray?

All conversation stopped. Then picked back up after our silence.

"WHAT?" I said. I just knew that I didn't just hear her talk about spraying "Hot Shot" bug spray on the greens.
"I said I sprayed some Hot Shot on the greens!"
"Are you serious?" I barked. "You can't do that!"
"Chile, them bugs was eating up my greens."

We just stared at each other for a moment.

"Well?" I asked.
"Well what, Dr. LadyLee?"
"Well, did it work?"
"No. Them bugs still eating up my collards!"

I just shook my head.

"Dee, make sure you wash the greens off real good before you cook them."
"Oh, I didn't cook any. I gave some to my sister, though."
"WHAT??""Sure did," she said."Did you tell her that you sprayed roach spray on the greens?"
She shook her head hard. "Chile, no! I just gave them to her. I was hoping that she would be alright."

*huge crickets*

"DANG, DEE!!" I yelled. "What if she get sick?!?!?"
"Oh, she cooked them already. She said they were good. And she seem to be alright."

Roach spray on collard greens to kill bugs.

I. have. heard. it. ALL, Man!!!

I told her to go get some Sevin-Dust and sprinkle it on the plants. That kills the critters. I'm going to have to get a little of my own to deal with this cabbage issha.

But we still talk about that to this very day.

"You a fool, Dee!" I always yell. "Frickin' bug spray on the greens!"

"Chile, I was trying to get rid of them bugs!"

That reminds me:

I have some flying insect spray beneath the kitchen sink.

I wonder. . . Oh, I wonder if that will do until I make it to Home Depot??

LOL!!

State of the Garden, Part I

This post is dedicated to that chick that be out gardening in her pajamas, The Pajama Gardener Carleen Brice.

Yeah, Ma... There are several questions throughout here and only an expert like yourself can answer them. I'm too lazy to research this. So please help a sista out. Much obliged!

Ahhhh yes...

'Tis that time again. You know, it's time for the Oldgirl to crank up the garden...

If you can remember, last year, I did about 10 posts on my backyard garden.



Man oh man, the excitement of it all!

The gorgeous beans!


The radishes that looked like they were smoking the crack rock!


The fat okra!



And the cucumbers!!!


Those cucumbers sho nuff set a salad OFF!



But the beans... THE BEANS, THE BEANS, THE BEANS!

Remember that pot of beans, potatoes and smoked chicken!?
That. was. some. GOOD. eatin'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GLORY!!! Can't wait for all that!

And who could forget Oscar-Tyrone's obsession with snatching beans.
I'm still not sure what that was about.

But, it's gonna take a bit of work to get all that goodness back again. And I am NOT as excited as I was last year. Now in the least.

Maybe it was those $90 water bills that came in all summer. That's a real eyeopener, when I'm use to little $20 water bills.

So...

I was out looking at my patch of earth in the back yard:
(*Carleen spills cup of hot orange mint tea all over her desk. She clutches her pearls, backs away from the computerscreen, and screams "What the... What in the world!!"*)

LOL!

You know, it ain't all that bad. And I really want to take an axe to that tree. I told Milk and Cookies to cut that sucker down when he and my neighbors were out building the fence (See my "Hence the Fence" post).

But noooooooo, he thought it was such a nice tree. HUMPH.

And right now, it's got all these berry things growing on it. Eww. I'm wondering what kind of tree it is. Hmm.

The berries will be bright red soon. They will fall out the tree, all into the garden, and I have to run around out there picking them up.

*gas face*

Anyway, Mr. Thomas, one of my more colorful locals, cleared out the patch of land for me. And, he did it in the middle of the night. He told me the other day, "I can do that, because I know your yard that well, girl!" *crickets).

So everything is ready to go, I suppose.


And oh... what 'tis that I see out in the midst of the garden? It is my Rosemary bush from last year. And the lemon balm also came back! GLORY! (It also means there are two less things I have to plant). And what is that growing next to to the rosemary plant?

Is it the beloved herb of old, the Cannabis ativa?

I smile like Celie smiled. I step closer. I remember my dope smoking blissful days of old. I have special thoughts of lighting it up...

Uh, it don't quite look like the magical herb. I don't know what it is.

I just keep thinking in relation to the number of the leaves:

"When there's three, let it be."

Meaning... it's something else.

Is it poison ivy???

*Lee frowns and takes one giant step backwards.*

Uh, Pajama Gardener... Is that Poison Ivy?

HUMPH. That right there would be my excuse for not gardening at all. I thought about that for all of 5 minutes.

Then, I put on a glove and pulled it up.

And if you look closely, right in between the rosemary and lemon balm, there are a few brown sticks sticking up.

That was last years basil. Now, I've been giving it a chance to sprout leaves. I don't think it is coming back. Still brown and dry as all get out.

I dug it up, and put down some type of strange mint plant in it's place. (Yo Carleen, where can I get some of that Orange mint? Do that even grow in Georgia, or is that a Denver thang?)

Carleen is calling for peeps to plant a "peace garden" per Pearl Cleage's new book.

Yo, I'm gonna have a "peace row" in my garden. That's as good as it gets. I will not be feeling very "peaceful" if I have to do more than that, hon. LOL!

And while rummaging around in the garage, I saw this.

Why in the world do I have so much lighter fluid? And I've been looking for that can of butter flavored PAM all frickin' year!!!!!

Well, you know what THAT means... That can only mean one thing:

Summer is commin', and it's time to throw down on that grill!!!!!!!

Yes sirree!!! The perfect activity while working out in the garden!

So... what's my game plan? I only plan on working out in the garden for about 30 minutes a day. That's enough for me. I have put out tomato and cabbage plants last weekend, and will plant beans this Sunday. (No bush beans this year, I am doing the vine variety, so I have to build some trellises. DANG!) I will also plant cucumber, squash, and okra seeds this weekend.

I might fool around with some peppers. (Not sure about that because I suck at growing peppers).

All I know... My work is definitely cut out for me!

Stay tuned:)

Gardens and Such, part XI

Much has been going on in the garden since I last did a garden update...

Well, not really that much. All I know, it is definitely cucumber time.

I've harvested at least ten cucumbers. And if I see another cucumber, I'm going to scream. It trips me out to go outside after a hard rain and see cucumbers just laying out on the ground.


I am not sure what's up with the tomato plant.

I have one plant, and that sucka is sprawling out of control, and has at least 40 tomatoes on it, but they are taking their sweet time turning red. But I have managed to pick a few that turned red, and they are VERY good, bursting with flavor. Wasn't expecting that at all!


As you can see, I'm also getting a few peppers. Not many, though, but about 5 or six. I threw a couple of those in a pot of collard greens... And yes, they made allll the difference.

There's a strange pepper growing on one of the plants. Not sure what kind it is, but it is big. If you know what it is, let your girl know. But for now, I'll just let it sit out there on the plant...

I have okra in the garden, but had pretty much given up on it. Some of the plants grew to about 2 feet tall, then just stopped growing. The last time I grew okra, the plants grew to 8 feet tall. I was thinking that I'd bought some bootleg seeds or something. Well, imagine when I walked outside one afternoon and saw this:



Yes... we have okra! But the problem with okra is that it grows real fast, which means I have to go outside everyday and pick it. That's gonna be a problem because I go outside every other day to look at the garden. (I'm so lazy!). But I think I can spare a few minutes going out and picking, ya know??

So that's the garden update for now.

Stay tuned for another!

Gardens and Such, Part X

The tenth garden update... Geez!


Okay, so check it out... we gonna go fast and keep it short. So don't blink, or you may miss something...


Here we go:


Seeing that I REFUSE to go buy a cute little garden basket:


Cucumber in a bootleg aluminum pan!!!



Cucumber cut up in a bootleg aluminum pan!!!



Cucumber all cut up in my lunch!!!

Hold up... hold up... something's missing.


Forgot to add the shredded smoked gouda!!



Yeah... That's how it go...


Any questions?!!

Didn't think so!

LOL!!

Gardens and Such, Part IX

Good merning, boys and girls!

A garden update is long overdue!

I haven't done a garden post because everything is taking it's sweeeeet time to grow. And that is fine by me, since I only spend an hour a week out there!

The bush beans stopped producing, and I pulled up all the bean plants. I think I got about 4 to 5 pounds of beans out of the garden. We ate most, but froze a couple of bags for later! I replanted those two patches and I should see the new crop on or about September 1.

So one more thing... The cucumbers are starting to bud.

Now I was quite excited about that!! Until I skipped outside to look at them the next morning and saw this:

I was looking at the two budding cucumbers on one plant and saw that out of the corner of my eye on another plant! Man... scared me so bad... I thought it was a snake. Let's just say an Oldgirl jumped sky high and ran into a tree.

*LadyLee jumping up real quick and looking around real fast to see if anyone saw her act a fool*

LOL LOL!!!!

I examined the other plants closely. I have about 5 cucumber bush plants. There are 3 large cucumbers out there, and they should be ready to pick in a few days.

Cucumbers grow pretty fast. One of the buds above is growing pretty fast. I took the first picture in this post on the 4th of July. I took the following picture on July 9th.

So they are growing pretty fast.

I planted some collard greens, and it looks like I have a handful of peppers coming in. I am trying to figure out the best time to pick those, though. The tomato plant is as big as a damn oak tree, with about 20 small tomatoes on it. Those should be ready in another week or two.

And you know I'ma have the pics for you, right?

So that's it, boys and girls, for the garden update!

See ya next time!

Gardens and Such, Part VIII

Man...

I have been soooo busy, buried waaaay under paperwork. So I dug myself out and decided to take a bit of time to do a garden post. I don't have much to say, so this is mostly a picture post...

Well, all is well in the garden. I picked a good pound of beans last Friday.

My cup (bootleg plastic container) runneth over!!!


LadyTee keeps screaming, "Lee, you need to go get a pretty little basket to place your vegetables in!"

**crickets**

No, LadyTee... any old Wal-mart bag or bootleg piece of Tupperware will do.

I threw those beans in a pot, along with a smoked chicken leg quarter, a couple of cut up onions, and some red potatoes and did the darn thing!

Yes, those are cooked "southern style", i.e., throw that ish in a pot and cook it to death.

I never knew one could eat green beans raw until the Infamous Hen-Dog came over one day, grabbed one of the green beans and started munching on it.

**LadyLee reaching for him yelling "Wait Shorty, those are raw!!".

He said, "Now those are FRESH right there. I can taste the chlorophyll in them beans right there!"

(Yes, us food chemists think and talk like that. This is normal).

So, I tried one, and he was right. They were very fresh, succulent, and sweet. I saved up some raw ones for my salad.

Anyway... other gardening news.

Something went terribly wrong with the radishes. The tops were quite pretty, green and soaring almost a foot high above the ground, but the actual radish roots were JACKED UP!

This is almost always due to rocky soil. I live in the ATL, land of the red Georgia clay... I would have to mix up some special soil or something.

Oh. Dear.

What is an Oldgirl to do?

I tell you what an Oldgirl does. I dug that ish up... and kept it moving. I went and bought a couple of pepper plants and placed them there. Problem solved.

I'll be damn if I'm going to be mixing up some special soil. Humph.

Moving right along... got some peppers coming in from apepper plant I planted a month ago. I think I'm suppose to leave them on the vine until they turn red or orange. I don't know. I will just water them everyday, and see what happens. And that's the way I like it.

And the tomatoes have suddenly appeared.

Houston... we have LIFT OFF!!!! LOL! 'Bout time!!!

Those are of the Roma variety. I hate those big tomatos... These should be small...

Cucumber plants are beginning to flower, which mean I should see cukes beginning to bud in the next ten days or so.

I thought they would leaf up a bit bigger than that, but oh well... Long as I don't have to tend to them (besides watering)... whatever.

I got a little bean leaf blight going on in the back corner of one of the bean patches. Not sure why that is happening. I think it is deficient in a certain mineral or something.



I don't know. And you know me...

I got my shovel in my hand, just in case I gotta dig that ish up!!!

Bush varieties, of which both my cucumber and bean plants are, are determinant plants, which means that they are going to produce heavy for a few weeks, and then die off. That might be what's happening. The indeterminant plants (the vining varieties) produce all season long.(See, I do read about this stuff sometimes-- albeit for only a few minutes at a time, LOL.) I can't stand vining varieties, because that means I have to build frameworks and trellises and fool with chicken wire... I've done that once before. Never again! My name ain't no damn Celie, man!!

Which means I'll be digging that part of the garden up in a couple of weeks and replanting for a... FALL HARVEST! Whoooo-hoooooo!!!

Well, on to the front yard. (yeah, this post is long... SUE ME! You'll be a'ight!)

I planted some pretty flowers, all purple and white, a few weeks ago. This was an interesting experience because as usual, I had to hear Snake complain about all the hard work he had to do helping me spread out my pinestraw and plant the flowers.

But I had to dig it up (man, I LOVE my shovel!!) and throw them away...


Why? Because for some reason, the purple flowers grew out of control and ate up the white flowers... So I had a bunch of purple flowers and weeds... That stuff grew so out of control that we had to have a running start to get up the front steps.

So I went and bought some new flowers. Home Depot had a sale, and took my tail out there in the hot sun and looked around... I came home and yelled up the steps for my sister...

"Kentucky! Kennnnntuuuuuuckkkkky!!!"

She steps out of her room, and looks over the railing. "Yes?"

"Whatchu doin'?"

"Nothing."

"Help me plant some flowers later on."

"Okay."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I will help you."

I thought she would say no. She even looked excited about it. Wow. I am 1% Diva, and I don't like dirt. And I sho nuff can't stand being out in any type of heat. My sister Kentucky is a PURE 100% Diva. Enough said. But she said okay. We decided to plant at six o'clock. She even came outside early, around 5:30, while I was still piddling around in the garden.

We planted some lovely plants out front.

It was TOO funny seeing my sister fool with the trusty shovel, using her flip-flop clad feet to shove the spade into the ground.

We had too much fun. Man, it is very RARE for me to spend time with my sister. VERY RARE. I think it is the age difference, and we are both consumant loners, who like waaaay too much quiet and solitude. I am more apt to run with my brother Milk and Cookies, since I tend to be a tomboy and like to tare up stuff, lol. But we hung out for and hour and a half, planting flowers and spreading pinestraw.

Even Mr. Thomas, a local, came by and cut the grass. And of course, he wanted something to drink afterwards. (Hen-Dog gets pissed about this. "Lee, stop spoiling the crackheads!!!")

Whatever, Shorty. It was hot as hell outside, and I don't want old dude to fall out in my yard. I would hate to have to drag his body out into the middle of the street after he die from heat exhaustion...

So that is the the gardening news update...

Yes it was long... As I may just do one other post this week (or maybe not). It's all according to how much of this paperwork I can get off my desk!

Have a good week:)