Bubble Wrap Blues

So...

I got a big shipment of parts that I've been waiting for for my wonderful "chemical machines".

It took me a lot of nudging to get said parts... $3000 worth to be exact (and I need more than that really.)

I will give you an idea of the convos I had with my department director, my boss' boss.

Director: "Why do you need 3 of the same parts?"
LadyLee: "What??? I really need 5!"

Director: "Well, I don't know why you need blah, blah, blah...
LadyLee: *LadyLee leans back in chair and raises back of hand to forehead in damsel in distress mode* "Look, if you don't care, I don't care. I'm going to leave here today, and go home and have a cold glass of water, and watch Oprah... and live my life."

Director: *Frantically dials up my boss*. "Darth Sista T, why didn't you tell me that equipment wasn't operational?"
LadyLee: *gas face*

LadyLee's final words:

"Look, you don't have to sign this order. If you don't get some of this stuff, we can't work, and that's cool, because that means I can go home, and do the stuff I really want to do."

"Hey, I need you to know two things. I'm not ignorant and I'm not lazy. Long as you know that, you can do whatever you want to do."

My director ran and got some weird orders notebook, and it turns out she basically wants me to put ONE thing on an order sheet at a time so "it won't look so bad".

*crickets*

Whatever. She scaled back my order... and I will appease her and put one part on one order form at a time...

I went back to the cubicle area and shook my head, and told my coworkers... NOW I understand why ya'll don't like that chick.

I say what I want to say at work. I've been scapegoated and thrown under the bus and pimp slapped all at the same time by management...

That's cool... as long as I get my 2 cents in, it's all good.

My mantra... Management can go sit on a FAT tack.

But all of my parts came in last week... in the the lovliest BUBBLEWRAP!!!

Question: Am I the only one who, when they see bubble wrap, think about twisting and popping ALL of the bubbles? Does your heart race (like mine) when you see a whole mess of bubble wrap!

I threw allll that bubble wrap on the floor in the middle of my cubicle area. I had grandiose visions of myself getting a good running start. I wanted to run up on that bubble wrap and give it a major stomp down...



Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, STOMP, STOMP, STOMP, STOMMMMMPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I tried to stomp it... and nothing happened. Almost fell and broke my frickin' neck!

Why didn't anything happen?

Bubblewrap technology has taken a new leap...

We could not pop the bubbles no matter how hard we tried. We twisted and squeezed... couldn't bust any bubbles.

I handed it off to one of the specialists in our cubicle area, "Princess Diana". I asked her to figure out what was wrong with the bubble wrap. She pondered it for a moment, then grabbed a razor blade from somewhere on her desk (I raise an eyebrow, trying to figure out what she's doing with a blade stashed on her desk), and proceeds to cut a bubble.



She explained, as Cowgirl Cre and I stare, our eyes wide, that once you cut one bubble, a whole row collapses. So even though we can't burst the bubbles, it is actually a better type of bubble wrap.

"Princess Diana" is so doggone smart.

HUMPH.

In other words...

No. fun. for. me.

I wonder where I can get some of that good Ol' school bubble wrap???