The Kat on Program.

Of course... not my cat Oscar-Tryone. Oscar doesn't care about programs. He just wants his food and water bowl kept full. He just wants for someone to rub him...

I am talking about "Kat", the Obi-Wan Kenobi of my book club.

Yeah, she's just like Obi Wan Kenobi, but she's a black female, slim with curly hair. She would never wear such a funky outfit, although I do believe she does stand like that... bold, ready and confident, ready to handle a thang or two...

She is always thinking about something, always on a self-improvement track, always seeking and searching to do better...

And I am down for that, man!!!

I am a Diva, and I need a STAFF, so the Kat has been added to my staff... She has written a little sumethin' for my blog, some food for thought. I've been thinking about how to go about posting it, so I'm trying to work that out... maybe her thoughts, followed by a little of my commentary on what it means to me... something like that.

So stay tuned for "Kat in the Korner" sometime this month...

Now, I like making music CDs for Kat because she jumps all around like it's Christmas or something each time I give her a set. For some reason, she LOVES my CDs. I think I've made somewhere between 15 and 20 CDs for her. She has a lot going on - she's a world class Diva Extraordinaire with things to do, places to go, and people to see.

I think the CDs give her a little solace... a little mental relaxation in these days of hustle and bustle.

So, I made 3 CDs, and I gave them to her at our bookclub's Financial Freedom class... of course she jumped around. Too funny...

And here are the song lists... Enjoy!

Slow Moving Kat V

The fifth in the series of Slow Moving Kat Quiet Storm CDs... Watch out, now!

Lately – Tyrese
My First Love – Avant/ K Wyatt
Sweet Lady – Tyrese
Beauty is Her Name – Dru Hill
Honey Molasses – Jill Scott
Any time, Any Place – Janet Jackson
Anxious – Ginuine
My place – Tweet
The Way – Jill Scott
Don’t let Go – En Vogue
Déjà vu – Dionne Warrick
The Secret Garden – Quincy Jones
Take Me as I am – Mary J. Blige
Don’t Leave me Girl – Blackstreet
Float on – The Floaters

The Dancing Kat

a grab bag of music to dance to...

This place Hotel – The Jacksons
The Kissing Game – High-Five
Little Walter – Tony, Tone, Toni
Off on Your On – Al B. Sure!
Every Little thing you do – Soul For Real
Comfort Zone – Vanessa Williams
Love Makes No Sense – Alexander O’Neal
If it Isn’t Love – New Edition
Lover Girl – Teena Marie
Fake – Alexander O’Neal
Come Into my Life – Joyce Sims
Encore (long version) – Cheryl Lynn
Wrap My Body Tight – Johnny Gill

Erykah Badu Mix CD

Rim Shot
On and On
… and On
Cleva
Kiss Me on my Neck
Sometimes
Why We Still Living
Would you Gonna Do?
Four Leaf Clover
Bag Lady
Rim Shot (Live)
On and On (Live)
Searchin’ (live)
Time’s a wastin’
Green Eyes

The Essential Art of Pimping, Part II

So...

Tayari Jones was at the MM House...

And as usual, she gave a great read and wittingly answered questions.

And she signed a lot of books. Heck, I even wanted to buy a book for her to sign. Mine were signed 2 years ago. I brought my copy of Gumbo, which contained her short story, Press and Curl, the first piece I've read by her. So she signed it.

(Next time, use my real name, Man... Although "Nettie" is cool! LOL)

Anyway, that was that. I hung out a little longer to talk to her and take a few pictures. No, I didn't ask her any writer questions. I look at her like she is Celie now, a cousin or something, and I got a WHOLE bunch of questions answered about some things that were deeply disturbing me about writing during the "conversation" between Tayari and Le.e Smi.th, so I was exceedingly happy about that.

Another exciting thing... I met an author at MM House, who is in a writing club here in Atlanta and she gave me some information about it. I, LadyLee, am in DESPERATE need of some type of writing group, critique group something, as I write profusely these days. So I happened to be in the right place at the right time. I'm definitely going to check it out.

Well, Tayari had a headlining talk at the .AWP conference. From what I can tell, this appears to be a conference for writers and people in the writing profession (publishers, editors, etc.). It was held at the downtown Atlanta Hil.ton. I was stoked about that because I live two miles from the Hilton. So it was just a matter of jumping in the car and getting on down there!

Well, I walked into the hotel and walked around. Even went and checked out some of the tables and brochures, etc...

Let's just say, there was A LOT going on. There were a couple of mixers going on, a bit of rowdiness...

And let's just say I heard a few convos that were a bit too much for my tender ears.

Yeah, let's just leave it at that. The point: people were having a GOOD time.

Well, Tayari's talk was at 8:30 pm. I wanted to sit on the front row, but I sat on the third row. (I would have hurt whoever would've told me to get off the first row!) Tayari came in dressed to kill as always and she was sporting some insane boots.



(And what was up with the fishnet stockings, Tayari? Hmmm?)

Whoa. A crocodile skin get-up with the clear heels. More specifically, a pair of "brown croco-embossed boots with a clear lucite wedge heel". (Yeah, the way she said it sounds muuuuuch better).

I don't know, man. I don't know how she pulled it off, but she was rocking those boots. I am thoroughly convinced that Tayari does not shop for shoes at all... She has her own special shoe fairy that jumps off a cloud or climbs down a tree with a lovely display of highly eclectic shoes. No one could pick shoes that so perfectly coordinate with their outfits like her.

Let's just say everyone was completely and utterly mesmerized by the boots. They made a statement, that's for sure.

And again, she had to walk up on stage. And again, I was sitting there thinking...

"Please don't fall!!!"

I, however, am so disturbed by clear heels. I was chatting over email last year with Serenity23 and The DJ Diva, and the subject of clear heels came up. Serenity23 was irate about them, and I asked her what the problem was with clear heels. She said they were stripper shoes. And low and behold, everytime I see a story about strippers on the news, etc...

They always show pictures of the high heel shoes having the clear heels... and it's those big blocky looking clear heels, not the lucite wedge type.

But Gee Tayari... clear heels and fishnet stockings...

*crickets*

Okay, never mind. I don't feel like getting blasted today.

The boots were hot, and you rocked them! Go on, Celie! YOU do YOU!

Moving right along...

I was overly excited by this talk because she was reading from her novel-in-progress, "The Outside Child". And I tell you, she did a fantastic job as always. It looks like it is going to be a very good story. Can't wait for it to come out.

Tayari, feel free to send the first 100 pages my way. You have my e-mail address, my home address... just send that ish whenever you feel like it. (Yes, i will continue to lobby for it FOREVER).

I also got a chance to meet Tayari's mother. We rode up in the elevator together. Her mother's friend recognized me, but didnt' say anything. But she talked to me later. That was so funny to hear "Are you LadyLee?!!" My 5 seconds of celebrity! Oh joy!

Well, I talked with Tayari again, took a few pics (darn, I HATE that I lost my pics!), and headed on home.

And I pondered the whole experience.

I will go on and say it. The title of this post is pretty harsh... so much so that Tayari couldn't link it, due to it possibly disturbing some of the readers of her site. (It's. A. Metaphor.)

"The Essential Art of Pimping"

I didn't name it that to be funny, but it is just harsh. But that is how I feel about the whole experience of writing your work and having to work hard to get out there and sell your book, whether it be to an agent, a publisher, or a fickle audience. It is harsh, just like the word "pimping", because one has to essentially get out there stomping the pavement, talking about that book, reading from that book, talking about WHY you wrote the book, why you write in general, etc... the whole nine.

Shoot man, I understand the whole "pimping ain't easy" cliche these days.

It is a harsh thing. And I must say that it leaves me completely exasperated and deflated. To think that I have written something great (in my own eyes, of course-- am I not suppose to feel that way about my own stuff? LOL) and have to fight through all the nerves, the criticisms, the EVERYTHING just to sell it... a harsh thing indeed.

And man, I am feeling like I am too old for all this hoop jumping...

I told Tayari's friend The Good Nurse that she might have to watch out... I may just throw everything I write up on my blog... Not sure if I can handle a publisher clutching me by the throat concerning my work or anything I do. I am not sure if my skin is thick enough. Not sure I can handle not being thought of as a writer just because I don't have all these publication, etc.

Like I said in the previous post, and something that I am trying to come to terms with... I LIKE WHAT I WRITE. If no one does, I DO. And I take solace in that.

I think it bothers me that writing is such a solitary profession, and all of a sudden, you have to be this outgoing person to sell your book. And I have seen and met a lot of authors who are not all that outgoing, who don't care to even talk to people... just a bundle of nervers. I mean, they are not being hard-asses or anything... It's just their personality.

But at the same time, I am biased... You gotta do what you gotta do. Period. I've had to stand up and give scientific talks with no notes and no stuttering. It took me two hours to defend my dissertation. There was nothing worse than giving a talk while being scrutinized and shot down.

Shoot, what's wrong with doing all you can to sell your book, then?

Get over and do it, I want to scream. Jump the freakin' hurdle!


But like I said, and totally understand, some authors... it's just not their thing. And I am beginning to understand that after pumping out my own manuscript and getting in shape for submission, having to discuss it with people, etc. When Tayari asked me what my manuscript was about (I would have NEVER bought the subject on my own due to it being bad etiquette), I was a bag of nerves, not knowing what to say or do...

Which brings me back to this whole "pimping" exercise. I think I commented to an author, I can't remember who right now, that I realized that one really has to be excited about their work, and really get out there in the streets and grind. It is almost like a dealer selling drugs or a pimp selling women... That is harsh, and I don't care for that AT ALL.

Which brings me back to Tayari. She is most definitely one of the most vigilant authors I've ever seen. She does it RIGHT. She is powerfully efficient and successful at stepping on stage, reading excerpts and making people WANT to buy the book. I am completely and utterly blown away by the fact that she can take a book that is 5 years old, and make it sound new, fresh, and exciting. I mean, that just rocks my damn world.

Hell, I almost bought more copies of both of her books my ownself.

Now THAT'S why I get so freakin' excited when she comes to town. Don't mean to jock her, but it is what it is. I am not all that big on questions... I just like to watch her, and learn how it is done, how to do it all RIGHT. She does it all, and she does it well... Almost like a case study, a "how to" of how to sell your product... something that I have been a bit worried about for a while now. Like I said, I LIKE WHAT I WRITE. You want to buy my stuff, fine. If you don't, then fine. I LIKE IT.

I gots to kill that attitude. Real quick. And it is slowly burning away the more I sit back and watch someone who has mastered it.

Watching her do what she do, i.e., watching her pimp...

Gives me hope.

And that's all I can ask for.

So Tayari, you did good, gal! I will be there, taking mental notes, learning this "game" from the best...

See ya soon... and uh rah... hurry up with The Outside Child.


Your fans have waited MUCH too long!

The Essential Art of Pimping (Part I)

So you all know I was all excited this past week...

Because Miss Celie was coming to town.

That is, Tayari Jones was in town!! And she did what she does best: she pimped her novel Leaving Atlanta.

Tayari reminds me of the wisest pimp, a pimp who has a small stable of women. All of his women are out working the corner except one: a 75-year old prostitute well past her prime. But that pimp sees something in her, and he yells...

Get up, Old Girl... You still got what it takes! You still got some work in ya! Get on out there and work that corner."

Yeah, that is a crude example. But I tell ya... Tayari looked at her critically acclaimed novel Leaving Atlanta and was like:

"I'm going to read from this here book, even though it is 5 years old. And I'm gonna SELL some of these books tonight."

Yeah, Tayari... you sure do know how to pimp a book, man!!

And I'm down for that!!!

Anyway, she gave readings at the Marg.aret Mitc.hell house, along with Southern Author Lee Sm.ith, and at the .AWP conference, with Ka.ye Gibb.ons. (No I'd never heard of these two other authors before, although they were Oprah book club authors. I don't even watch Oprah, so...)

Tayari was more concerned about the .AWP reading, but I told her that I would be at both talks. Afterall, The MM house is only a block from my job. My plan was to get to work around six in the morning and leave for the talk around 6:45 pm.

Now, here's the first problem. That's a long shift. It would have been cool, but we have been thrown headlong into the busy season at work, so I was working my ass off for at least 10 hours that day. So by the time of the talk, I was BONE tired. I'd been a little sick during the week, so heck, I really wanted to just lay down somewhere and take a PHAT nap. My plan was to go to the MM house and find a seat waaay in the back up against the wall. That way, I could lean up against it and close my eyes if need be.

Well, I'd been WAILING and WHINING really hard to Tayari for at least a month about that damn 10 dollar MM house entry fee, so she put me on a list and I got in free. (Now, I had my 10 bucks just in case she was tripping). I went in and saw her across the room and waved... I was trying, at the same time to scope a seat off in the cut somewhere.

Anyway, Tayari makes a beeline towards me. (I was sort of looking around trying to see who she was heading towards). She was a little pissed at the moment. I won't mention here why she was so perturbed!

(But Tayari, that ish was funny! If you needed to handle some folk, you know I had your back! Ain't nothing wrong with a little shanktification, if you know what I mean.)

But she calmed down. Thank goodness. I was too tired to have to help her with a ATLien beatdown...

I ended up sitting in the front row (which I wasn't all that crazy about, as I had to fight the urge to lay across the chairs, lol!).

Yep, I, LadyLee had a reserved seat!!

We sat down and waited for things to start. Tayari had on the most interesting shoes as always... some strange high heel patent-leather shoes. She wears the craziest shoes. They are always nice, and that is coming from someone like me who HATES heels. She seems to go find the highest high heels she can find, even though she is 100 feet tall... I was wondering how the hell she was going to get up on that small stage without falling. I would have hated to have laughed at her, you know.

So I was sitting there on the front row with Tayari and Lee Sm.ith, when Tayari turns to me and says...

"Nichelle finished your manuscript critique. She did a line edit of your manuscript."

**gargantuan crickets**

My breath caught in my throat when she said that. I almost shed a tear.

Now, I'd won a manuscript edit a few months ago, and I sent the first half of my 1000 page manuscript to Nich.elle Tramb.le a couple of weeks ago. I was stoked about this, but at the same time terrified, because I am a fan of Nichelle's work, and I know from her website and blog that she has a TON of editing experience. So I've been walking around, staring into the sun and sky, silently wondering what the status of the critique was. I was too afraid to email Nichelle (I HATE bothering people, and I am THOROUGLY and UTTERLY confused about all of this damn writers etiquette), as I thought she may have found it excruciatingly boring and had tossed it out into LA traffic.

But when Tayari said what she said , I had to ask...

"So, what did she say, Tayari?"

Tayari didn't answer, only said what she said before. She only explained to me what "line-edit" meant... I made a mental note to go look that up (I pontificate things like no other!)

So for the next few minutes, I was sitting there thinking...

"Oooh noooo, she didn't like it! These #$#%*@ broads been sitting around dogging my manuscript out! Uggh!!"

I had the urge to go sit off in the corner, rip my clothes and dump ashes on my head like they use to do in the old bible days.

I got over that real quick. Heck, I LIKE my manuscript. I'd been mulling this over in my mind for the past week, and I decided that I LIKE it if no one else does. I convinced myself real quick that that was all that mattered, doggonit!!

Yeah!

I was a wide awake deer in the headlights after that.

Anyway, I was Tayari's bootleg entourage, and I looked to be the only member. That was cool. She asked me to hold her camera and gift cards while she went up on stage. I was happy to do so...

*Ladylee slyly peering at gift cards to see if they were from Wal-mart or Target. LadyLee deciding quickly not to hijcack them since they weren't from Wal-Mart or Target.*

LOL!!

Anyway, the talk at the Mar.garet M.itch.ell House was pegged as a conversation between two southern authors.

I found it to be quite interesting. Tayari pimped read from her first novel Leaving Atlanta, and did an excellent job of fielding questions from the audience. Miss S.mith read from her Appalac.hian novel. Now THAT was interesting, but that Appal.achian language left me a bit dazed and confused.

Their "conversation" was very interesting. The whole urban southern writer and appalachian southern writer convo about the hardships involved in writing each was on some whole nother level..

Interesting talk... And, as usual, Tayari sold a lot of books, especially Leaving Atlanta.

Way to pimp that book, Celie!! Leaving Atlanta still got a little rap left in it! I don't know how you do it, but I know, ten years from now, with several books under your belt, you will STILL be able to efficiently pimp Leaving Atlanta!

Now the .AWP reading and signing? That's a whole 'nother story...

Stay tuned for... "The Essential Art of Pimping (Part II)."

Happy 5th Wedding Anniversary Cowgirl Cre and Timmy-Tim!!

I would like to wish two of my best friends, Timmy-Tim and Cowgirl Cre, a HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!

Now, I always miss their anniversary. For some reason, I keep thinking it is on March 5th but I realized that it was today when I came to work this morning and my cubicle mate, the Cowgirl Cre, was not there. She usually gets in around 6 a.m... I got in at 6:15 a.m., expecting to see her. I realized around noon...

"Oh, today must be their wedding anniversary!"

Now, like I said, both Cowgirl Cre and Timmy-Tim are two of my best friends. I see Cowgirl Cre every day at work, as we share the same cubicle area, but I only see Timmy-Tim now and then...

But how they met is funny... and yep, I, LadyLee was in the midst of that ish!!

I am sure they won't mind me giving details... especially since we STILL howl over how it all went down...

Fade to black... Harp music...

I met Timmy-Tim when I was 19 years old (17 years ago... damn that's a long time ago!), when we were both chemistry majors in an Analytical Chemistry class together in college. He was this rail-thin white boy, with the blond mullet hair style, and he always wore the black t-shirts with the heavy metal band on the front and the tour dates on the back (you remember those shirts!). We became fast friends, and studied together, etc. I was always the volatile one, whining about classes, etc... He was always the one to say, "Don't worry LadyLee, go ahead and take the class. I'll take it with you. We'll take it together. It's gonna be alright."

Yeah, he was that type of friend. Let's just say that Timmy-Tim has seen the Oldgirl through a WHOLE LOT and he knows all my bizness.

Now one thing: My undergrad chemistry department was largely made up of black students, and Timmy-Tim was one of a few whites. He always ended up hanging out with us. So imagine this white boy, sitting at the table, eating his sandwich, listening to a bunch of black women talk and trip, etc. He didn't care. He even jumped into the convos and gave his opinion.

We were so crazy about Timmy-Tim that we labeled him an "Honorary Black Woman".

LOL!!

That's just how comfortable we were with him. I knew his family, went to family functions, he knew mine... In my dissertation acknowledgements, I called him my brother. That's how close we were.

Now, I met Cowgirl Cre back in 1995 or 1996, I believe. I was in graduate school, and she was an undergraduate student. I walked into a friend's lab and Cre was sitting at a computer surfing the internet. I was munching on a sandwich of some sort. I said hello, she said hello... I spoke with a few people in the lab, and then someone yelled for a fire extinguisher... A fire had apparently broken out in a fume hood, and I got the hell on... (No, I don't stick around for lab fires and explosions. I've had a few of these. Best to get the hell out of dodge. I may blog about them someday).

Well, I didn't see Cre for a while after that. I saw her downstairs one day in a lab, and she was looking for chemical glassware. She was in a group that didn't have much money,i.e., they were always pilfering and scavenging around other labs for glassware.

Well she asked me if I had a particular piece that she needed...

"Yeah, we got that upstairs, Cre. And you can borrow it."
"Well, when are you going back upstairs Lee?"
"No time soon. But you can go on up there. This dude name Tim is up there right now. He'll help you."
She frowned at me. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah, just tell him what you need. We have a lot of glassware."
She was still uncertain.
"Girl, go on upstairs. His name is Tim and he is cool. He will help you."
She was looking worried as all get out. "Well, OK."

She went up to my lab and met Tim. She saw that he was cool. Then she would come around more often, as all the black folks hung out on our floor. Damn, I believe we saw her just about every day. And that was cool because she was a really cool and funny chick. And you know me... I like cool people.

Apparently, Timmy-Tim liked cool chicks too.

Anyway, one day, Timmy-Tim and I were sitting in the lab at our long desk-bench studying, when he leaned over and said...

"I like somebody."
I frowned up at him. "Who?"
"I'm not telling you."
I rolled my eyes at him. "Well don't be mentioning it then, if you not going to tell me!"

I was glad nevertheless. He'd just come off a nasty breakup. I thought he would NEVER get over that chick "Linda". I was glad he'd broken up with her. She was nice, but she would tag along with Tim when he'd come hang out with the black women, and we had to watch what we said around her. You could tell real quick that we were too crazy for her. And Timmy-Tim was our "honorary black woman", which means he was one of us. This "Linda" chick was much hated, to say the least. (Even though she was a sweet girl:)

Anyway, I was glad he liked someone. I couldn't figure out who. I mean, there wer a couple of white chicks running around that he would grin at.

But Timmy-Tim grinned at everybody.

Anyway, Cowgirl Cre starts tagging along on some of my and Timmy-Tim's outings. No bid deal.

Well Tim and I were walking to class or to the library or something and he confesses to me...

"LadyLee, I like Cre."

I don't know what I said. I just knew that I was shocked.

Things went on from there. Things got a bit bizarre at times. Like one day, Cre left her inkpen on our desk. Timmy-Tim snatched it after she left, and whispered...

"This is her inkpen. She wrote with this pen!"

He guarded that pen with his life. It was something of hers. It belonged to this girl that he had a crush on.

We got on the elevator one day. Timmy-Tim inhaled deeply, then exhaled, a sly smile on his face.

"Cre was on this elevator. That's her scent. I smell her.She was here!"

Bizarre. Funny, though, even though it was some borderline stalker type ish.

Anyway, he finally told her that he liked her.

She, um, didn't return his sentiments.

I remember her talking to me later about it.

"Lee, your boy said he like me."
"Is that so?" I said, even thought I already knew this.
"Yeah. And I don't date white men."
"Oh, ok," I said.

Anyway, I had to hear Timmy-Tim lament over all of this.

EVERY DAMN DAY.

Now, at the same time, he was still trying to talk to her or something. I don't quite remember, but there was some convos going on between the two of them. Which meant only one thing...

I was stuck in the middle of the whole situation.

Cowgirl Cre and I had become pretty good friends. I lived in Grant Park, about a mile from school, and we would hang out on my front porch and talk,or just yack for phone for hours. (I am pretty quiet, but Cowgirl Cre is a VERY talkative chick!)

So let's just say I knew ALL of what she thought about the situation. I knew ALL of how Timmy-Tim was feeling, too. The man was practically crying on my shoulder. I had to be real careful what I said to either one of them, not betraying either's confidence, because I knew how EACH felt. Even my boyfriend was having to hear a lot of talk (my boyfriend found it all hilarious! Plus he LIVED for that type of drama!)

And looking back? That was hard, watching what I said.

Long story short. Timmy-Tim was a lovestruck puppy. Cupid had not shot him with an arrow. Cupid had hit him upside the head with a brick or a shovel or something.

Dude had it bad.

Cre wasn't trying to hear all that. She wasn't dealing with no white boy.

Anyway, I ended up going out of town to Florida for a week for a Chemistry conference. When I got back, I ran into Cowgirl Cre. She was driving her Pulsar "PJ" (she names her cars.). I was walking to school. We had a convo, and somehow, she said something that made me think... hmmm. I asked her if something was going on with her and Timmy-Tim.

She nodded yes, very nonchanlantly.

This meant I needed to get to school and speak with Timmy-Tim, because if I knew that boy, he was running the hallways arms stretched out, blond hair blowing freely in the wind, singing "The Sound of Music".

Well, I got to school, walked into the lab... and Timmy-Tim was grinning ear to ear. I told him that I'd talked to Cowgirl Cre. He was disappointed because he wanted to talk to me first. I don't remember too many details. I DO remember him saying...

"Gurl [and he said it in that sister-girl way, as he was our honorary black chick], I wanted to do the Toyota Jump after I kissed her."

He proceeded to do the Toyota jump and let out a loud yell.

*LadyLee jumping back out of fright.*

Wasn't expecting all that... Let's just say that dude was very happy!

Well they dated for a few years.Now, I had to hear ALL the details about this relationship from both sides. One of the most memorable convos, which went on for awhile, was about a damn Anita Baker Body and Soul CD that I had loaned to Tim. Let's just say something happened during this um, romantic CD.

I had to hear about all the "love". ESPECIALLY from Timmy-Tim, since we work side-by-side in the lab. (I won't um, afford the details.)

"LadyLee, blah, blah, blah!" Tim details, grinning ear to ear. " But you can have the Anita Baker CD back if you want it. Whoo Girl, that's a GOOD CD! Oh my!"

*LadyLee shaking head vigorously and holding hands up in surrender* "Hell nawl, you keep it. It seems to hold special memories. I'll just go get another one."

I had to hear about all the fights.

Now I explained to the hot-tempered Timmy-Tim that um, you gotta treat black women gingerly. I don't know, but I was familiar with a couple of his past relationships and how he liked to argue about stuff, etc."

Like I said, I had to hear about the fights!

Cowgirl Cre: "Girl, you need to talk to your boy!! He trippin'."

On some other occasion... Cowgirl Cre: "Girl, you need to get your boy. I had to cuss your boy out!"

(Humph! Never quite understood why he was "my boy" or why I had to go talk to "my boy" when there was a problem.)

As usual, I'd see Timmy Tim in lab or in class. "Lee, I tell ya, we argued. She made me cry."

Goodness. Cowgirl Cre was a hood chick. I warned him about that. I mean, we had some LONG talks about that, because Cre was from somewhere off Cleveland avenue, deep in the hood, and she didn't take any sh** off peeps!

My boyfriend at the time found it all to be hilarious, to say the least!

That's what he get, LOL!!

But they stuck it out, through all the ups and downs, through thick and thin.

They got married on March 2, 2002, some six years later. It was a rainy rainy day. It was a beautiful wedding. I remember getting all choked up when I'd gone down in the basement of the facility where Timmy-Tim was hanging out, sitting there, waiting in his tuxedo. (Wedding was running late. Cre was taking her time... you know how we are). We took pics and talked. The wedding finally started. I believe they went to the Carribean for the honeymoon.

Anyway, I am no longer in the midst of stuff, where one of them is lamenting in one of my ears and the other is crying out in the other. (Although this does happen, but on very rare occasions.)

And Cre and Timmy-Tim, looking back... that ish stressed me out! Thank goodness we ain't going through that anymore, LOL!!

But I just wanted to wish the two of you a Happy Anniversary... Cowgirl Cre and I were looking over the menus of the restaurants that Timmy-Tim were going to take her to for their restaurants...

Do your homegirl a favor and hook this Oldgirl up with a to-go box.

LOL!!!

(But on the real... bring me some crabcakes!!)

Happy 5th anniversary!!

And many many more!!

Tayari Jones is Coming to Town!

Yo, I'd like to dedicate this post to that hater my book club sista/book club president Shunda, 'cause she thinks I jock Tayari so hard!

Yeah Shorty, I do... so get over it!!

*LadyLee brandishing a homemade shank in one hand and with the other hand throws up the hard Celie crooked 2 fanger point at Shunda*

Watch out now, Shunda. Don't make me have to cut you.

I would be remiss...

If I don't jump up and scream and shout that...

Miss Celie is coming to town!!!

Miss CelieTayari Jones is coming to town!

Tayari Jones is coming to town!



*LadyLee doing the happy dance so hard that she slips and falls down on the hard concrete*


Yes, I am a happy black child today!

Yeah, ya'll should know that Tayari Jones is my favorite author in the entire universe.

If you didn't know, go read my first post on Ms. Jones.

Now you know!

And here are the essential details...

Wednesday, February 28, 7pm-- Atlanta, Georgia
Margaret Mitchell House
Crossing The Line: A Conversation with Tayari Jones and Lee Smith
Reception at 6pm, Conversation at 7pm, Booksigning at 8pm

Saturday, March 3, 8:30 pm-- Atlanta, Georgia
AWP Conference
Reading and Signing (with Kaye Gibbons)

Now, the Margaret Mitchell crew likes to charge money for entrance into their events. I try to keep tabs on who is there, since it is only one block from my job. I saw Ernest J. Gaines, the author of A Lesson Before Dying there, last year. My coworkers have gone to see Alice Walker, Blair Underwood, and Tavis Smiley when they were there.

Yeah, they charge a fee, and the talks are always good. But's what's up with this conversation set-up? What the heck are they going to talk about? Listen, for my ten bucks, I want to see a show. Tayari and Ms. Smith better get an electric slide or a Soul Train line going. They better be passing out some tequila shots, hot wings and french fries up in that camp.

Ten bucks, man... come on, now. That's night club prices. That's half a tank of gas for my zoom-zoom. (Well almost half a tank.)

But I have been BEGGING Tayari over email to waive that fee and allow me to be a part of her entourage. I would gladly carry her purse, fetch a little water if she is parched, or even turn pages as she reads. Just waive the 10 dollar fee, man. Sneak me in the back door or something (She says I am on a list. We'll see about that... Don't be joshing me, man... because I will front on you, and you don't want that!! LOL!)

Now what's highly important is that AWP conference reading. She is suppose to read from her novel-in-progress. I have been lobbying HARD for the first 100 pages of it, and she is turning her nose up at me. (Humph. You Diva!) I have seen a very small snippet of it which was EXTREMELY thought-provoking, as to be expected. My praises of it DID NOT get me the requested 100 pages.

HUMPH!!

Oh well. I am just happy that she will be here. I will just have to buy the book the minute it comes out.

Now my brother, Milk and Cookies, Tayari's #1 Groupie, was suppose to drive up from his military base to attend the Saturday reading. He was going to do some old wild craziness, like act like Eva at the Apollo, or cry and scream uncontrollably as she walked by. Enough so people would say...

"Look at that poor hysterical child... He almost passed out when she walked by! What book has that boy been reading? I want that book!"

But the boy couldn't get away. He has to work his second job, and I hate for him to lose his job. ("Tell Tayari I need to make my money, Lee!!" he screeched over the phone.) Yes, he wailed VERY hard to me about this over the phone yesterday, as he'd been planning to drive up.

(Dude calm down! It's gonna be alright in the by-and-by! Geez.)

So I may or may not post about the readings. We'll see!

I'm just happy she is coming to town. She ALWAYS gives a good talk, and it's always like being in a quick writing workshop:

I always learn something new!!