Monday, December 05, 2005

Jeremy's Funeral

Today, December 4, 2005, we buried my beloved tomcat, Jeremy Girard Dorsey, a.k.a. "Lil Head", in the backyard of my house.

Snake, the local crackhead... I mean, um... the local substance user, came over on Saturday and dug a grave for Jeremy.

We planned for a Saturday funeral, but my sister Kay had to work. Then Kay decided that she would rather spend the weekend with her boyfriend in Macon, GA. I was talking on the phone to my best friend Lady Tee when Kay told me this...

"Well Kay, since Jeremy is in the garage in the deep freezer, we can just have the funeral next weekend," I suggested.

"Hell na'll," Lady Tee barked. "You tell Kay to pass by that damn freezer, say a few last words to Jeremy, and then get the heck on. We burying my nephew this weekend."

Hmmm... Kay was cool with that...
The next thing I know, Kay had packed a booty bag and got the hell on...

Doggonit Kay... you skipped Jeremy's funeral for some weekend "twerk" action...

Humph...
I ain't mad at you...

So there were just three of us at the funeral. We got together after Church and had a 2:30 p.m. funeral.

Pokie, Lady Tee's cousin, was to be the pallbearer, but I chose to go ahead and place Jeremy's casket/cardboard box in the grave myself...




Pokie grabbed the shovel and covered up the box, and I placed a makeshift tombstone on top...



"Ya'll got any departing words?" I asked.

Pokie said, "Yeah... So long, cat. Good-bye."

"I got somethin' to say," Lady Tee declared. "Jeremy, I remember how you use to park yourself in one of them dining room table chairs and hiss and growl at me when I would sit down in a chair next to you. Nigga, I wasn't trying to bother you. I was just trying sit down and eat my birthday dinner, and-"

"Alright, Lady Tee, calm down" I said, trying to console her, because I could see she was about to go off on my deceased cat.

I was the final one to say something.

"Jeremy, I'm gonna miss you, little boy. You were a good cat."

We had a moment of silence. Then we took a few pictures.

"Let's get our eat on," Lady Tee said.

I'd wanted to cook out, but it was raining off and on. So I picked up a 10 piece family box from Churches chicken on the way home from Church...



We sat around and ate chicken, mash potatoes, cole slaw, and biscuits. We also finished off Kay's sweet tea. (Sorry Kay, you'll just have to make some more...)

Then we looked at the Falcons game on television...

...and The Superfriends on my Laptop.





Snake, the local substance user, showed up late for the funeral. I told him that the funeral was over, but he could have a plate of food if he wanted. He declined, gave his condolences, then decided to sit on my front porch and shell some pecans... (He is deeply in love with Lady Tee... I think that's the REAL reason he was lurking around!. She went outside and talked to him for a minute. Dang, I never seen Snake smile so hard!)

But that is how Jeremy's funeral went.

I'm gonna miss you little boy...

You were a good cat.

Yes indeed!

9 comments:

  1. I'm sorry about the loss of your baby.

    I love my cats too. And my dog Ruby, who died at age 17.

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  2. Well that was just wonderful ma! Great send off:)

    My ex just gave me back the puppy we used to share..it's sort of weird to have a puppy and not a cat...:)

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  3. Oh I love the song ...how fitting...

    I tell you...that was deep...from the local crackhead(who are always around) to your sister skipping the funeral for some butt...

    But Goodbye Jeremy...I bet you were a good baby...

    Now if I can just get mine under control!!!!

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  4. @Jaimie... Thanks Jaimie. I had a dog that died at age 14. That's some devastating ish...

    @Dee-Dee... Thanks, Ma. (And you better keep little "Funky" around!)

    @DJ Diva... Thanks, DJ... And didn't you know cats acn't be controlled? (They control us! :) )

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  5. Ladytee3:11:00 PM

    I will miss my nephew.. The next Super Bowl, and my next B-day get together I want have any one to fuss with. Keep your head up LadyLee.

    Your girl for life,
    Ladytee, we still have Oscar.

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  6. @Lady Tee... You actually left a comment... WOW! you've NEVER done that before... You usually hit me on my cell phone and talk a lot of ish!! You're moving up in the world, girlie!

    yeah, you won't have anyone to cuss out anymore, will you... We still have Oscar Tyrone, though!

    But thanks, homegirl, for coming by for the mini-funeral... You see Kay got the hell on... I STILL haven't heard from that girl... Humph...

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  7. So very sorry to hear about your loss. I'm an avid cat lover also.

    If anything ever happened to my Pooter, I'd lose it!

    Sorry.

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  8. Am not a cat person but I know the pain of losing a pet

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Slap the *crickets* out the way, kindly step up to the mike, and SAY something!!