I am Thankful... Part II

Click here for I am Thankful... Part I

LadyLee's Married Man Story (circa 1989), continued.

So I'm standing there at the front door, in awe, staring at this wonderful sight of a man standing before me, all dark chocolatety and muscular, gripping the doorjamb...

... thinking to myself "I'ma DO him!"

He said that he was in the neighborhood and was driving by, wondering if I still lived there. I would think that he knew that I did, as my T-bird was parked in the driveway. He was wondering if I would like to get together sometime and go out. He wanted to talk to me about something.

Now I remember standing there just staring at him, real close to salivating.

Never mind that I had a man. Heck, I'd just hung out with my man earlier that day.

Whatever!

I was gonna try and hook up with "Rocky J".

The problem was that me and "Rocky J" had history. I met him in 6th grade. He was the class clown, the one who stayed in trouble. We even went to high school together. We hooked up back when we were in high school, in the summer of 1985, before we went to the 11th grade. We would talk on the phone, and I liked him a lot. He came over one day during the summer, when I was home alone and we got busy. Never mind that I was involved with someone else ("TB") at the time. (I posted about "TB" in this post under the "LadyTee steps up defend my honor" heading. LadyTee is STILL pissed off about my situation with "TB" even though it is 2007. )

(By the way, what the heck was up with this cheating problem I had back then? I am starting to upset myself. Geez.)

Anyway that hot summer day back in 1985 was a milestone for me, a day I'd never forget. "Rocky J" was quite important, because he was the first person to... how could I say this lightly and delicately... help me understand that a man could have oral skills. Right now, I'm thinking back to that time, and I can't imagine how a 16-year-old boy could have such skills. I mean, I had no idea what he was doing at first, and then WHOOOOOAAA.

Goodness.

Yeah, we will leave it at that.

Now, I was so enlightened with him back in high school that I broke off with "TB", the guy I'd been seeing. I didn't know the proper way of breaking up with a person, so I was like "Uh, I like Rocky J... so um, I can't deal with you right now, ya understand?" (Imagine my sheer confusion after having to hear TB wail "How can you do this to me!? I care about you!)

Anyway, it was 1989, 4 years later, and Rocky J was standing at my front door, talking to me. I didn't hear much of what he was saying. All I gotta say is that it was a good thing that my mother was at home, or I would have dragged him into the house.

I gave him my phone number and we made plans to go out. After he left, my mama looked at me a little crazy, but she didn't bug me with too many questions. I went upstairs and called up LadyTee, and told her what happened.

Rocky J and I started going out. One of those times he told me that he was still married, but separated. He said that he didn't plan on getting a divorce or anything. He wanted to know how I felt about that.

Me? I wasn't asking him to do nothing like that. I didn't care. He married right out of high school, which I thought was stupid. All I was concerned about was getting my groove on. None of that was happening, and I was getting impatient. But we were digging each other, and enjoying each other's company. Plus, I had my own boyfriend to deal with. I was running around with Rocky J because I was curious about being with a married man.

LadyTee and I had a discussion about this. Her only advice was to be careful, because he was still married, and broads are crazy. She didn't want that broad to run up on me. I told her that it wasn't all that serious, and that we were just kicking it as friends, even though I wanted to get with him.

Well, Rocky J and I ended up going back to his place one night. He met me somewhere, and I followed him in my car back to his place. Once I walked in, I wasn't all that happy about that. First of all, I had no idea where I was, and I didn't tell anyone where I would be, as I was not expecting this. Second, he had all the windows in the house open. That was cool, since it was nice outside, but I didn't want that wife of his jumping through the window doing a Rambo on me. But I calmed down after awhile. We sat around and snuggled on the sofa. We talked and watched a movie.

And... uh, you know how that goes. One thing leads to another, and...

We ended up on the living room floor, wrapped in a sheet, getting busy.

I remember thinking, lying there, wrapped in a sheet with him on the floor, in the glow of the television...

"Dang, I just slept with a married man."

In all my naivite, I thought that I was going to be different, or the whole experience would make me different in a some way. But I wasn't. Everything was everything. I wasn't emotionally vested or anything, and I guess that was why I didn't feel any different than usual.

Well, Rocky J got all emotional on me. Wanted to lay up in the afterglow and talk. (I always thought that was a female thing. I've come across very few men who are "touchy-feely".) He talked to me about his issues with his ex-wife. I didn't want to hear about all that. But we'd been doing a lot of talking anyway, so I just let him talk.

Then he got over into how violent she was.

This... this revelation of violence caught my attention.

"Lee, she would come at me with sharp objects."

I'm laying there holding him, thinking... What the hell?

He got up and turned on the lamp. He was naked. I remember thinking "He sure has a nice body!"

He sat back down, and pointed to a bunch of keloided scars on his chest. He said his wife had ran up on him with a pair of scissors and tried to stab him. He fought off the attack, but he was cut up pretty bad. That's when he decided to get his own place.

I remember looking up at the open living room windows. The soft breezes were causing the curtains to flutter. It was a very nice moment. Or it least it could have been.

But I was imagining his wife jumping through the living room window at any moment, attacking us or something. I mean, whoever happen to be walking by while we were doing the deed probably got an eye full. I know they heard quite a few sounds. What if his wife had stopped by? Right then, any interest I had in him just went away instantly. Enough of the tender moments. I was glad I'd driven my own car. I quietly looked around for my clothes, looking for a way to casually get up off the floor, and get dressed so I could get the hell out of dodge.

"You're leaving already, LadyLee?"

The look on his face screamed "please don't go!" I felt terrible, but I was down for him.

"Uh yeah, I gotta go. I have some studying to do."

That was the end of that for me. I dodged his calls. I dodged him. He even stopped by my house one day. I didn't answer the door. I wanted nothing more to do with him.

Didn't want to get caught up. Man, I was much too young to deal with any drama that would come from that situation.

And besides... I knew in my heart that it wasn't right...

Now, LadyTee and I had had several discussions about all of this... I talked to her on the phone last night about this, because I didn't remember many of our discussions. I just know that we talked about it. She remembered it too.

One thing I do remember... She didn't dog me out over it, or turn her nose up at me. She didn't withdraw her friendship from me. I do remember her being mindful of me, keeping up with me, and checking up on me...

Last night, she told me (after a long pause to think about all the CRAZY stuff I've done in the past) in the 25+ years that we've been best friends, there hasn't been anything that I have done that would cause her to cut our friendship loose. Nothing at all.

And for that?

I am thankful...

to be continued.