A LadyLee Christmas.

Now I know you're saying...

"LadyLee... How the heck you gonna be all late with the Chirstmas report?"

I just am. My Christmas wasn't all that spectacular. I was just happy to have 2 weeks off. I don't really celebrate the holidays. I'm not really down with hanging out with the family and what not. I was more interested in being by myself really. (Yes. I admit. I am selfish. SUE ME!)

I don't do the whole family get together thing any more. That is over. Stresses me out because I always get in some doggone trouble. I am 37 years old, and I am DONE with all unnecessary and preventable drama.

Looks like the older I get, the less of it I tolerate. Makes me come off as evil, but I don't give a flip.

Humph.

What I do is, during the week of Christmas: I spend a whole day with my Grandma, and a whole day with my Aunt. We all seem to enjoy ourselves a little better that way.

I took Grandma to see The Great Debaters, which she loved. (It is an excellent movie, and Grandma loves herself some Denzel!). I also took her to her favorite Christian Bookstore, and bought her a few books. I also let her know that I was going to hook her up with a debit card for use of some for her small expenses (gas, grocery, etc.), but she was not under any circumstances to tell my mama, cousins, uncles, etc. I would hate to have to open up my Book of Cuss on folks. I really would. 'Specially if they come smiling in my face.

So we were rolling hard in my z00m-zoom down the highway and I was carefully explaining this arrangement to her.

"It's called confidential, Lee. You want me to be confidential."
I glance at her and then back at the highway. "Yeah, yeah, confidential. Do you know what that word means."
"Yes I do. Confidential means confidential." She nods real slow.
*Lee frowns hard*
"Alright, alright. Long as you know."

Grandma nods again and gives me the hard eye squint.

I'm convinced that Grandma has a little undercover gangster in her. LOL!

I like hanging out with my Auntie Joyce. She always got some type of project going on, whether it be her oil painting, her doll making, sewing, soap making... She always into something. We like to get together, sit at her dining room table and work on things. This time, I was crocheting a blanket for Oscar-Tyrone. I actually finished it up.



Yes, he finally got himself a blanket. I made it with extra yarn left over from Tayari's blanket. I had to pretend it was mine for awhile, but I layed it at the bottom of the bed, and he has taken to it.

But Auntie, she came out the box on me. She took coffee filters and made some, uh, lovely snowflakes, something like that.




Auntie asked an interesting question:
"You wanna try, Lisa? I'll show you how to do it."

I looked at her like she had lost her mind, then straigtened up my face real quick. "Uh, no. That's alright. It's real pretty, but uh, no, you do YOUR thing, Auntie."

LOL.

Of course, I made plenty of cookies.


I have a 100 dollar budget for Christmas, which means people get homemade gifts or a simple "Merry Christmas", if you do get that from me.

LadyTee got her usual gifts, which I know I've given her for at least the past 10 years: storage bags, soap, and cookies. This time I did something new. . . she'd been talking about parchment paper, so I got that too!


And it's that good soap, too. She got locked up once, and they gave her the jail issued soap. She complained to the officers that she had sensitive skin, and couldn't use it, and that she only uses Dove or Tone. Of course they laughed at her.

I, as her best friend, from then on, make SURE she has her Dove and Tone soap! Always!

LOL!

I know she yelled at me something awful on Christmas morning, because I said I would be over there early. We were suppose to go to the dollar movies to see Tyler Perry's Why I Got Married. I messed around and got up late, and dedided to do some writing, which angered her. Plus her son got a Playstation 3 for Christmas.

"Anyway Lee, all you gonna do is get in that back room with Nell and play that doggone game!!"

Yeah, this was my intention, once she told me that was his major Christmas gift. Yes, I've been wanting a Playstation3, but have had to come to terms with the fact that I can't spend that type of money on some ish like that when I have other priorities. (Yes, I am growing up, finally).

"No, LadyTee, I will just have a look at it. Maybe 10 minutes or so. That's all."

*silence on the phone line*

She was hassling me something awful. I was suppose to be over there by eleven in the morning, but I think I got there by three.

Once I saw Nell, I was like... "Yeah, Yeeeeaaaah boy. I heare WE got US a Playstation3."

He had that same glow in his eyes that I have when it comes to gaming. He and I both LOVE the Playstation basketball games.

He wanted me to come look at it.

I had to play it off, or else LadyTee would diss me again, like she had been doing all Christmas morning...


"Dude, let me go in here and talk to your mama for a minute. But set up that Basketball game. Set me up as the Celtics," I whispered. "Go head on and set everything up. I'll be back there in a minute."

I talked to LadyTee, who was in the den, for a half hour or so, then pat her on the shoulder and told her that I was going to go check out Nell's game, and I would be back in a few minutes. She looked like she wanted to go off, but she didn't.

Yeah, I think me and the boy played that game for a good 2 hours. LOL!!

Later, LadyTee, her daughter, her mother Bobbie Jean, and myself went to the movies. That was a good time, especially since the price was 50 cents a piece! They made me drive, so I drove them NUTS with my Coffy Soundtrack.

Afterwards, LadyTee had me drive way off deep in the woods to some house that had a gazillion Christmas light decorations. They had it set up where you drive through their property and look at the displays. It was pouring down rain, and I wasn't in the mood, but I went along with the program.

Some of the displays were... interesting.

Man... when did the peeps from the Wizard of Oz get involved with Christmas?

And when did Snow White and Seven Dwarfs show up for Christmas? Snow White even has a wreath in her hand...

Yo... why is Snow White looking like she's had too much coffee... or too much meth... or has she had too much crack? I mean, she didn't look in the zone like that in the movie or in my coloring books... She looks like she might be singing that "You said I gotta go to rehab... I keep saying no, no,no!) LOL! And my goodness... I'm tripping out on Santa with the Baby Jesus. WOW! And I do love the cake with the candles!

I was all tuckered out after all of that... I went home and went straight to bed...

Overall, it was a great Christmas!