Tuesday Blues and Crazy Convos

I woke up this morning at 4 a.m. and felt like CRAP!

It has to be due to the 14 degree ATL temperatures. And that howling wind.

And me needing to caulk my bedrooms windows, because I was catching a draft or something.

Not to mention the ceiling fan was swirling at full speed.

So an Oldgirl woke up at 4 in the morning, and it felt like someone had taken a torch to my right sinus passage, my throat and my right ear. (Anytime I'm sick, it's always the right side. Not sure what that's about.)

And it just don't help that Aunt Flo is here. I'm like those women of the bible. I need to be in a tent on the edge of the city. Enough said.


So I called in sick today. I hesitated as usual. But I heard my doctor's voice, high and shrill, her chastising me...

"If you don't feel well, don't go to work! Please!"

This is good advice. I have over 700 hours of sick leave. So I need to use it, if I need it.

So I've been in bed all day long... sleeping on and off. I've been drinking cold water and orange juice. I feel a lot better. Not sure how I'll be tomorrow.

Maybe I need to go buy a coat, scarf and gloves.

And maybe I need to turn off the ceiling fan.

While I was laying here, my cell phone rings. It's my doctor's office.

My heart leaps for a moment when this happens. It's always about some test result. I must say, over the past 2 years it's been nothing bad. Last time it was some silliness.

"If you're taking supplements, please stop. Too much Vitamin B in your blood. And you have a slight Vitamin D deficiency."

I don't know what to do about that. I'm not taking supplements right now. And I'm not going to stop eating my vegetables and fruits. BITE ME.

And I'm not drinking milk. Any dairy I drink goes STRAIGHT to my mucus membranes. And I'm blowing snot the rest of the day. NO.

This time they called and were upset about my bill payments.

I have a balance of -$225.00. This means I have a $225 credit at my Doctor's office.

I am cool with that. Apparently the chick that does the billing isn't. She's new. She whined about it.

This happened a couple of years ago. I like to have a huge credit just in case I need a test. Trust, that $225 will get dented hard if I need a ecocardiogram, a 24 hour urine test, ultrasounds, Xrays, or a bone density test. So my remedy for that is a simple $25 dollars out of my check every 2 weeks to my Doc. I go every 6 weeks, and I don't have to worry about nothing. I can just walk in and out.

Some chick called me back then and told me stop doing my $25 dollar ritual. Result: I ended up with a $400 dollar bill somehow. I was HOT over this. And I didn't go back until I paid that amount off. (Some 10 weeks later).

But when I went back, Dr. B. and I had an interesting conversation.

"Lee, I haven't seen you in awhile."

"No you haven't," I said. I was sitting in a chair in the room (I REFUSE to get up on the exam table). "I'm here now."

We discussed some test results. My lupus was still active (as usual). We discussed a few more things.

She checked my joints for tenderness. "So, why haven't I seen you."

"Because I owe you money, Dr. B!"

She looked up at me. She's a slight indian woman, only 4'8" tall, but she has a mean stare, and will go off on me, making me all weepy. She could tell I was getting a bit excited. I could tell she was wondering what she had said to have my voice all pitchy.

"You know you can just come in and out. You get a bill, pay when you can. I just need to make sure you are alright. With this lupus, things can be okay one minute, and you fall off a cliff the next."

"But Dr. B.," I said. "I can't come in here and owing you money!"

I ran down what happen. And I was very DRAMATIC about it. I told her my method of dealing with my medical bills.

I had the shaky voice and lip quiver. Tried to produce a tear drop, but it didn't happen.

She picked up her stethascope and checked my heart. (I was having pleurisy isshas).

"You know, you can make your biweekly payments if you like. I don't have a problem with that."
"But that nurse who called me, she said I couldn't. Dr. B.! I just wanna make sure you get YOUR money!"

She put her stethascope in her pocket. "Hold on, Lee. I'll be back."

She left my room and went OFF on somebody. Man I hate to get people in trouble, but doggonit, if I got a system that works, go sit down and let me work it.

She came back, red in the face. "Lee, you be sure to do your biweekly payments. You won't have any more problems."

*lee cheesing hard like Celie*

I like my Doctor. She's a vegetarian, so I can pick her brain. There's no such thing as veggies with Vitamin D (we've been arguing about that), but overall, she's a good Doc, and has done well with keeping track of my progress and catching problems before they get too bad.

Now, there's a new chick in charge of billing... and she called me today, and we had a long convo, with the insane question of "Ma'am, I just got a check from your bank. Do you want me to destroy it?"

*lee kicking Oscar-Tyrone out of frustration*

"No. Cash that. Add it to my credit."

Looks like I'll be having another weepy talk with Dr. B. about this. Humph!

Really.