Thursday, July 31, 2014

Food for Thought: Anger Danger

I heard something strange from a guest minister in a sermon a couple of weeks ago at church.

"It's not what people do to you that makes you angry, it's what's already on the inside of you that makes you angry."

Say whuuuut?

That had me a looking a little...

Now that didn't make much sense. I made sure to write it in my church notes so that I could ponder it later.

And after some thought, I could understand that statement a little better. I could view it through the lens of a quote I have posted a few times on my blog:

"Anger is an expression of fear."

That too at the time didn't make much sense to me. But after much thought, I must say that it has helped me immensely. When I am angry, I don't focus too much on who or what has made me angry. I always ask myself question "What am I afraid of?"

I spend much time with that question. I make sure to locate my fear, and try to face it. Fear is the root of my anger. If I kill the root, I kill the anger.

And then one of my favorite chickens Serenity_23, sent me one of her morning devotionals from Rick Warren, from a devotional entitled "Do You Need a Heart Transplant".  There was a good quote on anger included, that gave MUCH insight into the first quote above.

"If you build your identity on anything that can be taken away from you, you're going to become insecure, and insecurity is at the root of your anger.  Until you start feeling secure about yourself, people are going to be able to push your buttons. When you know who you are and whose you are, people can't push your buttons.   They can't get to you. Anger and insecurity go together. The more insecure you feel, the angrier you feel. The Bible says in Proverbs 29:25 (MSG),  "The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects you from that."

When you are angry, your mouth just reveals what's inside your heart. A harsh tongue reveals an angry heart. A negative tongue reveals a fearful heart. A boasting tongue reveals an insecure heart. An overactive tongue reveals a guilty heart. A judgmental tongue reveals a guilty tongue. A critical tongue reveals a bitter heart. A filthy tongue reveals an impure heart."

My oh my. That is one heckuva quote. You mean to tell me that I can listen to the what people say- I can listen to what I say- and tell what's going on in a person's heart?

Yes I can. There is a bible verse that addresses that, Matthew 12:34... "for out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks."

Hmmm....

That long quote does give some insight into anger. And it points straight back at that first quote of this post.

So the root of anger is internal.

Yes it is. I can vouch for that. This is why I do much internal work, because Lord knows I have my issues. Sigh.

I almost blew that first quote off. I am glad I didn't. I have had anger management problems in the past, and I still work on that. This just gives me more insight into what's going on.

11 comments:

  1. Wow .. Definitely something to think about. This wedding in particular has brought out a lot of anger in those around me. Which in turn made me really Anger and frustrated. Good Post to really think about.

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  2. I've always had issues with anger. I take that back ... I used to have issues with anger. It used to be something that I carried around with me like a security blanket. It was always right below the surface, waiting to show itself.

    It was kind of scary to be that angry all the time. I've done a lot of work on myself to discover where it came from and how to release it.

    I agree that it stems from fear and that once you know yourself -- you can let it go -- the fear and the anger.

    Great post.

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  3. Anonymous11:51:00 AM

    whoaaaa.....what a revelation!

    ~LisaBinAR

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  4. Anger and fear...need to ponder some more.

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  5. I'm trying to wrap my mind around this post. I had a relative physically attack me. I was scared. I am still mad at him. I know my fear is part of the anger. I am hurt and pissed. I guess I needed to read this post.

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  6. Anonymous5:25:00 AM

    Great post, it opened my eyes to look within. I can't go around anymore saying someone made me angry

    Mary

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  7. Great post!
    The last time you wrote about anger, it really made me open my eyes. I just read something that other day that said something like most people respond to threat by either fighting or fleeing. But, we don’t always have the option to fight what threatens us. Instead, we have anger.

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    Replies
    1. "But, we don’t always have the option to fight what threatens us. Instead, we have anger."

      These sentences just flipped a switch on something that I have been struggling with and praying about. I understand something about me a little bit better. Thank you for sharing.

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  8. I am going to have to think about this post a little bit more. I know it has something for me it in.

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Slap the *crickets* out the way, kindly step up to the mike, and SAY something!!