Yes, yes, yes.
I'm glad it's Friday.
The only thing that would make this Friday better is that if it was PAY DAY.
Alas, it is not. But at least it's Friday.
This has been a most... interesting week. I've had some... interesting conversations. This is usually the case, but they were just a little more O_o than usual. I welcome them. It gives me a little something to think about.
For instance, I had to express my feelings about something to a friend. This is always uncomfortable with me, as I'm usually punished for having an opinion. This wasn't the case with this person, so I am glad of that. That type of thing is always dicey for me. It's such a crap shoot. But I think this person understands my heart. That's what matters.
And then, yesterday morning I was called into the office of one of my favorite members of upper management. There's a new group/department forming, and he noticed that I don't and haven't been applying for these jobs. We had a LONG "Come-to-Jesus" talk about that, where I stood on my soapbox... several soap boxes as a matter of fact. Jobs in the past I have applied for within our department have been complete scams, i.e., management sleeping with each other and taking care of their favorite employees. You know me, I pride myself on not being a brownnoser, so this throws me off the favoritism ferris wheel. As a result, I don't like wasting all kinds of hours getting applications and resumes together. And the last promotion I applied for, some 5 years ago... well, when I didn't get it, I had to go console some person from another department on the panel who was COMPLETELY oblivious to what was going on. I am not sure why she was on the panel anyway, or why the other management ever clued her in on the scams. All I know is I refuse to go along with the shenanigans. I am too old for that. The only way I would apply for anything in the future is if it is on a merit basis.
And like I said, I don't particularly care for chemistry anymore. I have hit all my milestones. I told him that I am more interested in my dreams, goals and life's purposes.
He said "You want to be successful."
"Really?" I replied. "Am I not successful already?"
I ask you... Am I not successful?
With all I have accomplished over my 43 years of life... am I nothing but a mere failure?
No indeed. I rebuke that.
"Ladylee" and "Failure" do not and cannot exist in the same sentence... except right here in this sentence. Not in life. That is as far as THAT goes.
I backed my truckload of soapboxes and talked and talked and talked about that.
LOL. But I will placate these folks and apply. Much of that is because I have targeted my prayers. I had to figure out how to pray about job issues. I've had to really think about what I want to do and my desires and needs. I told him I am more interested in the agency across town that doesn't treat their people like crap, and isn't as messy employee-wise in general. He went a very long way to explain to me why that is (because he knows it is true). It was good to get some insight on a few things.
It was a very enlightening talk indeed. I learned much. I am less angry now.
I know when I left his office, he needed a good strong drank. VERY strong. That and a bowl of chitlins with plenty of hot sauce.
It was a good cleansing talk, You call me to your offices when I am sitting at my desk minding my own business... you're gonna get an EARFUL from the usually quiet LadyLee. That is all.
If nothing else, I think he understands these potent four words:
I am NOT my job
Unh-unh. Nope. I think about other stuff most of the time. Even when I'm working. Shouldn't be that way, but it is what it is.
We also had a fascinating convo about why folk are messy on the job. And how sometimes messy people are in charge of other people, which causes all types of problems in itself. It ties into one of those LadyLee postulates of life, LadyLee postulate #39371: People are that way way because they don't have a fulfilling life outside the job... or they have a most interesting secret life, full of secrets they are trying to hide.
We should be channeling all our internal raw energy into dreams and purposes and talents. That way, we won't have time or energy or even room to think about causing chaos in the lives of others.
*ladylee throws microphone high into the sky... it falls a few minutes later, just in time for that postulate to soak in*
I've read that in a couple of places lately. So I must be on to something. Hmmmmm....
Alright... I am tired of ranting. Got me looking all surly like Oscar-Tyrone in our picture of the week.
That's an oldie but goodie. OT is looking at me like I stole his money. And it's the major reason I rarely use my laptop in the bed these days. Oscar-Tyrone likes to stand there and stare at me in an accusatory manner. Not a good look. I think he just enjoys the heat blowing from the laptop. If he is enjoying it, he should at least smile.
"I don't wanna look surly like Oscar," LadyLee wails aloud.
On to more positive news.
I opened a credit union account yesterday. My sister Kentucky gave the birthday money I gave to her back to me. She wanted me to put it up.
I used about 12 dollars of it. So to keep from balling out of control with the rest, I put it in a credit union a block from my job. Go me! Green Eyed Bandit would be proud!!
I had a 10 minute doctor appointment on Wednesday. Got there at 3:27 and was back in my car by 3:42. That's what I like. It was only labwork. But I like that. I spent more time talking to the nurses than anything else. I need my appointments to be that short all the time.
We had a scare here in the ATL, where some mentally ill man ran up in a school with a weapon. A school administrator talked him down. She put that WORD on him.
Folks were saying that was pure luck. No, that was God. And it don't matter what people think anyway. It is what she thinks that is important. She will remember that hour of time the rest of her life. Her faith has been jacked up several notches. That is what matters.
And no kids were harmed. This man had 500 rounds of ammo. No one was hurt. I don't think anyone can stand another Newtown. No, no, no.
Song of the Week. Poetic Justice Instrumental by Kendrick Lamar
I don't care for the song with lyrics. I only like this song because I saw it performed on Saturday Night Live (never heard it before that) and it samples a Janet Jackson song I like. Otherwise, I have NO idea what he's talking about. He is a bit too deep for me. Let me have my old school rap, thank you very much.
I don't have much planned for the weekend. We have four days coming up in the ATL, where there will be NO RAIN. Clear skies for Saturday through Tuesday!
Baby, I feel like putting on some rollerblades and skating up and down my street all day with the sun shining warm on my face. That would be WONDERFUL. If it wasn't a shame, I'd take Monday and Tuesday off. Days of no rain. That's rare, like me going out and finding diamonds and gold buried in my front yard. GLORY!!!
I think I will just go for a nice walk or two instead. Yes, that sounds good.
And you... you enjoy your weekend, rain or shine, on purpose.