Still pondering my vision statement, turning it over and over in my mind.
And I'm making an effort to discuss each sentence in detail, trying to discover what it all truly means to me and my life.
Not quite where I want to be in each area, but I am forever mindful of where I'm at on the path to the goal.
As always, the part of interest for the post is highlighted in green.
"I am 100% healthy in my body, soul, and spirit. I acknowledge God in all my ways, and I seek Him before I make any decisions, big or small. I am a blessing to my family and to those that God sends across my path. I am an incredible asset to my friends. I am a good listener. I am an excellent employee, and I not only work hard, but I work smart. I take time to periodically evaluate myself, and I make changes accordingly. I stick and hold fast to the path God has charted out for my life. I accept and openly welcome constructive criticism, as I know it will help me become "a better me". I am a good steward, a fine manager over the finances He has blessed me with, to the point that God knows He can trust me."
"I am an incredible asset to my friends."
This doesn't take much discussion, as I feel as if I've been touching on it all week. As a matter of fact, that is why I grouped the last few posts together: they all involve facets of friendship. My friendships are important to me, since I don't have the huge deep close knit family relationships. As a result, my friendships hold a lot of weight with me.
But the most significant word in the sentence of interest is asset.
I looked the word up: it means, in this context, a person of value.
I am an incredible person of value to my friends.
Yes, I like the sound of that. That is a good, good, confession/affirmation for me to speak over myself. As a matter of fact, that was the easiest part of the personal vision statement to memorize.
The word asset has some wonderful synonyms: aid, benefit, blessing, boon, credit, distinction, help, resource, service, treasure.
Those are great words. I wanna be ALL that!!
There are some interesting antonyms to asset: disadvantage, liability.
To be a liabilty to someone? Ugh. That is crazy.
And if I am leave me alone, man... Run as far away from me as you can possibly get. Who needs someone bringing them down?
Although I have come across people in my life who will probably holler and scream that I've been a liability.
I think we've all come across that.
Usually, for me, it's because I ain't doing something they think I should be doing.
I, LadyLee, fall short of expectation. Yep, I said it. And that's alright. Will I change? Nope. Well, only if I'm doing something hurtful. Otherwise, I ain't jumping the hoops you're setting up for me. I cannot win that game. I stopped all that in high school.
You know, the older I get, I find that the easier it is for me to be okay with not being accepted by certain folks. I am really alright with it. I tend to concentrate on those with whom I've developed a good history with, and with those who I know love me.
Listen, there are 6 billion people on this planet. I have a handful of them in my corner, who are incredible assets in my life.
I don't need all 6 billion people in my corner. That's too much going on.
I can't be everything to everybody. And everybody can't be everything to me.
This affirmation of being an asset to my friends was born out of the way I felt growing up. My mother made me always feel like I was this horrible abnormal really bad person. I'm not so sure what's up with that. And I look back with sadness to a discussion I had with my brother and sister a couple of years ago, here at my house, and they have felt the same way, too. To the point where they were both saying that they didn't know if they wanted to have children, because they didn't want their kids feeling the way we all felt growing up.
Can't be upset with her. She did say some nice things, but it didn't hold much weight with any of us, for it was drowned out by all the negative. She even admitted to my sister that she didn't know what how to be a good mother.
(Oh that made me mad. Almost picked up the phone and called her. But I let that go. At least she realize it. We were GREAT kids. She just didn't know it.)
It took me well into my twenties to understand that I decide who I am and who I want to be. Period.
I am a person of value. To myself, and the people around me.
I am a great person, a very good person to know. You want me in your corner. I'm a great resource. I am helpful. I am sincere. I ain't gonna jack you up or do you wrong. I don't come at you with ulterior motives or agendas. I have the distinct ability to impart some things into your soul and your spirit that will help you become a better you.
You know, I say that to myself when I look in the mirror.
Heck, if I have to walk around the house and just say it to that Oldcat Oscar Tyrone, then that's what I'll do.
But I believe that about myself. I want it for myself. It's a desire of my heart. It's something I desire more than material things.
That's my definition of being an incredible asset.
And I have so many wondrous examples of that in my life. I know, in the last five or six years, I've had a grand infusion of people in my life who have been assets. They have taught me what it means to be a person of value.
For all of my friends are incredible assets to me. Each of them have their own specific purpose and dynamic in my life. No two are the same. I can look at each person in my life right now and let you know specifically what their purpose is and what type of asset they are to me.
I know I heard on the weekly show of a minister in my area that you really need to make sure you know the purpose of each of your friendships. And it ain't gotta be all deep.
"A friend's sole purpose" he said, "could be to simply keep you from cussing everybody on the job completely out."
LOL. I thought that was hilarious. But it is true. That person is an asset. Let's just say, uh, I got a couple of people who will snatch me by the arm and walk me to another corner of the building if I even look the least bit perturbed.
I can't be everything to everybody. No, that ain't possible, and I'd never want to be that. It ain't realistic.
But I can be an asset in some way to my friends. I can fulfill my purpose in their lives, however small or big it may be.
That's all I can ask for.
That's all I can hope to be.
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